Reverse Cowgirl:
How to Ride Like a Pro

In this guide: Why try it? | How to do it | Tips to enhance this position | Tips to simplify this position | Does it work with bondage?

Get ready to ride: this steamy sex position is a classic for a reason. Offering total control for the partner on top, incredible views for the partner underneath and deep penetration for both of you, the Reverse Cowgirl is a whole lot of fun. It’s also easy to adjust to make this position feel even better.

And if you thought this position was just for heterosexual penis-in-vagina sex, think again: Reverse Cowgirl can be reimagined for all couples and genders — and tailored with toys to stimulate your favourite hot spots. So, let’s get into all the dirty details… Giddy up!

Only got time for a quickie?

Read the full article for advice from sex and relationships expert, Annabelle Knight. Otherwise, all the best tips are right here:

• Reverse Cowgirl is a receiver-on-top sex position. The penetrating partner lies back while the receiver straddles them, facing away. It works for vaginal or anal sex.

• Don’t skip foreplay or lube. Getting nice and wet makes penetrative sex feel smoother and more pleasurable. Foreplay will also help you feel relaxed and turned on, which makes climax even sweeter when it happens.

• Touch your penis or clit while your ride. You’ve got plenty of room to bring in a clitoral suction toy or stroker to layer sensation and build arousal. The combination of internal and external pleasure is sensational.

• Build intensity with anal play. Ask your partner to finger your behind or slide a lubed-up anal toy inside you while you grind. Use lube and never switch straight from anal to vaginal penetration without a thorough clean first.

• Do it seated for a fresh feeling. This changes up the angle and gives you the intimacy of leaning back into your partner’s chest while they caress your nipples.

• Try light restraint for a kinkier vibe. Either partner can be restrained depending on the power dynamic you want to explore – pick a bed restraint to pin down the giver and make them feel even more helpless.

In Reverse Cowgirl, the rider chooses the depth, angle, and speed of penetration. So, if you’re not usually the one in charge, or you find it difficult to come in Missionary, Reverse Cowgirl could help switch up your roles.

“Many women don’t reach orgasm through penetration alone,” says Annabelle Knight, our sex and relationships expert. “Targeting the G-spot through penetration while also stimulating the clitoris is much more likely to take you all the way to climax.”

G-spot stimulation is one of the main reasons regular Cowgirl was voted the nation's second favourite sex position. When you reverse it, you still get G-spot stimulation but the natural curve of the penis (or dildo) ofers a fuller feeling as it presses against the back wall of your vagina as well.

For couples made up of Cowboys rather than Cowgirls, the angle doesn’t necessarily target the P-spot (a.k.a male G-spot) as well other positions, however people still enjoy it – particularly thanks to deep anal penetration and the amazing view the giving partner will get of your behind. It’s also easy for the receiver to slide into position and control the pace.

Plus: if you sometimes get self-conscious on top, then the lack of eye contact can make Reverse Cowgirl feel more liberating than some face-to-face positions. You’ll also have plenty of room to hold a sex toy against your clit or play with your penis while on top (more on that later!).

“Be careful when riding the receiving partner’s penis in this position,” warns Annabelle, “There’s the chance of a penile fracture if the penis slips out and is squashed during thrusting. And nothing kills the mood quite like a trip to A&E!” You can always apply more lube, or slow down and focus on grinding, if either of you feels any discomfort.

Most guides assume the giver is a person with a penis, while the partner with a vulva gets on top. It’s just as fun for same-sex couples, though. If neither of you has a penis, or you’re interested in pegging, we recommend using a strap-on. You’ll just need plenty of lube and time to practice your hip thrusts!

The first time you try it, you probably don’t need to do anything special; the novelty alone makes Reverse Cowgirl feel super sexy. When you're ready to get a little more ‘Yeehaw!’, these techniques will enhance the position – it’s not our first rodeo!

Focus on foreplay

Foreplay helps to build suspense and makes sure you both have time to relax and get fully aroused. When you do finally climax, it’ll feel all the sweeter for a little build-up. We love to recommend that couples try mutual masturbation, since it can be really hot to watch your partner touch themselves.

When you’re getting into position, get your partner’s pulse racing by sensually rubbing your bottom on their penis and balls; if they have a vulva, simply grind on their lap instead. Be gentle; focus on the feeling of your skin brushing theirs rather than pressing too hard – unless they’re asking for more of course!

Or, once your partner’s seated, you could drizzle their chest and legs with warm massage oil from a massage candle. Take your time sensually smoothing it into their skin, drawing your hands ever closer to their penis or vulva, without actually touching their genitals. That way, your partner will be really turned on when it’s time to ride.

Touch yourself while you ride

Touching more than one erogenous zone at once might help you climax, and can intensify orgasm when it does happen... so, let’s do it! You can use your hands, with a dab of tingling lube, to tease the clitoris or penis while you ride. (You can also reach down and cup your lover’s balls with tingly lube all over your hands.)

“Clitoral vibrators come in all shapes and sizes, but you'll often find [they're] slim enough to fit between two partners, with a pointed or rounded tip to provide precise stimulation,” says Annabelle. Even a clitoral suction toy, which can be bigger than your usual bullet vibe, works really well in this position, since you’ve got plenty of room to hold it to your clit.

For some, the combination of deep penetration and the rhythmic flutter of a clitoral suction toy is almost too powerful, so start on a low setting and let the sensations build.

If you’re on top and you have a penis, try the Lovehoney Reversible Double Stroker. Slide yourself inside (again, you’ll need lube) let the textured interior excite your member. Not only is this stroker reversible; it’s also transparent which can be visually very fun.

Consider anal play

It can be really hot to ask the giver to caress or spank your behind while you ride, making them feel even more active and involved in this otherwise laidback pose. They’re going to have a sensational view anyway, so let’s not waste a great opportunity!

You might like to let them finger your anus or slip a butt plug inside (lube, people!) and control the vibrations from behind. Butt plugs are easy for beginners, especially if you pick one with a tapered end and slender neck, plus they offer another way to stimulate the pudendal nerve which sends signals of pleasure and arousal to the brain. Pick a plug with a winking jewel to enhance the view, or a remote control that you can hand over to your partner.

If you’re both into anal, Reverse Cowgirl can be a great position to try since you’ll get deep while keeping the receiver in control. But regular Cowgirl or the Pretzel sex position might be better for your first time, since you’ll have more face-to-face communication.

Flip that saddle

You can always start in Reverse Cowgirl then, when you’re ready, switch (carefully) to the regular face-to-face Cowgirl position. Or the other way around! That way, you get to enjoy some sexy eye contact and compare the sensations offered by both angles.

You’ve also got the option to squat rather than kneel, which some people enjoy because it feels more active. Penetration may even feel a little tighter as you hold your pelvic floor and bounce, rather than grind, on that D.

Quick tip: If you’ve got a vulva, you could go from vaginal penetration in Cowgirl to anal penetration in Reverse Cowgirl, keeping things novel and interesting. That said, never go straight from anal to vaginal penetration without washing the penis or dildo first, otherwise you’re at risk of getting an infection.

Dress like the main character

Receiver-on-top positions like Reverse Cowgirl lend themselves really well to lingerie, since your partner gets a full view of your body from below. Pick a crotchless style so you can keep it on while having sex. Bodystockings can be really sexy while feeling comfortable and stretchy enough to move in, which is a key consideration when you’re doing all the work on top!

Lean forwards while you ride so that you can rest your weight into your hands. Stay kneeling (avoid the labour-intensive squat) and try gyrating or rocking your hips rather than bouncing and thrusting passionately. You can try this for a short time and then switch to Doggy Style, if you’re find the position too tiring.

If you like the idea of using sex toys, but don’t like fiddling with controls or holding a vibrator while you’re on top, try a wearable toy like a vibrating cock ring. In Reverse Cowgirl, you might prefer to position the vibrating head underneath the shaft of the penis, where it can vibrate against your clit and your lover’s balls.

Yes! If you’re a BDSM fan, or you fancy trying out bondage for the first time, you can definitely kink up the Reverse Cowgirl.

But BDSM is only fun if everyone’s into it — so make sure you get enthusiastic consent first. Chat about your boundaries and be sure to agree a safe word or stop action that can be used at any time.

For complete giver-submission, you can restrain them using bed restraints while you climb on top. Or switch up the dynamics by placing yourself in wrist or ankle restraints. These will comfortably lock you into position, giving the sense of control back to the reclining partner.

To add to the feeling of domination, try wearing nipple and clit clamps. Your partner can take control of the chain linking the clamps, and tease you with gentle tugs. If you don’t have a clitoris, using nipple clamps alone works just as well.

For a full up, stretched feeling which can be really erotic, try a double penetration strap-on. These toys look like a dildo and a cock ring all in one, endowing the giver with an extra member so they can slide into your butt and vagina at the same time.

Ready to try the Reverse Cowgirl?

As long as you can embrace the slow grind and don’t feel the need for speed, we reckon there’s a good chance you’ll want to saddle up and enjoy the Reverse Cowgirl on the regular. Particularly because it’s fun for all genders, and there are so many ways to tailor it to target you and your partner’s favourite erogenous zones. So, make this move your own, and give it a go!