The Beginner's Guide to Sex Toys

Why do people use sex toys?

People use sex toys for all kinds of reasons, but there's one big one: to experience incredible pleasure. Whether you love novelty or you just want a dependable way to get your rocks off, sex toys have a lot to offer.

You might use sex toys to:

• Experiment with different sensations, alone or with a partner

• Explore your sexual preferences

• Achieve stronger, more intense orgasms

• Help with issues like erectile dysfunction or low libido

You can use most sex toys during either solo or couple's play, no matter your gender or sexual orientation. When you're on your own, sex toys can help you learn about what you like and offer satisfaction you might not get just from your hands.

In a relationship, sex toys can open you up to new experiences and help you learn about each other's bodies and desires. For example, one member of the Lovehoney Forum says how much it turns her and her husband on just seeing each other using toys. "I love using strokers on my hubby," she says. "When he uses them on himself, I do get turned on watching him."

Many people use sex toys to make penetrative sex more enjoyable, particularly women who don't usually orgasm from penetration alone. If that's an issue for you, bring a clit stim toy like a wand or bullet vibe into play next time you have penetrative sex. You might experience a powerful blended orgasm, which is when you come from having multiple erogenous zones stimulated at once. Mind blowing.

One Forum member even found that using a dildo with their wife made oral sex incredibly thrilling for the wife, when she'd never been that interested before. "She came harder last night than I've ever seen her come," they said. If that doesn't make you want to try toys with your partner, I don't know what will!

Vibrators

Vibrators are, as you can imagine, sex toys that vibrate. You might think they’re are just for girls, but, oh boy, it’s not true.

Like dildos, some vibrators are insertable, offering sweet, rumbly stimulation to your G-spot or P-spot. Others are only for external stimulation, but you can tease them over any other erogenous zone — from your nipples to your anus.

If you’re buying a vibrator for the first time, I’d recommend going for a wand massager. They’re often gender-neutral and great for both couple and solo play. When you’re used to the magic, you can even explore adding different attachments to the head of your wand.

Here are a few other types of vibrator:

• Bullet vibrator: A tiny classic, these toys are usually external only. Since they’re so small and straightforward, they’re also great for beginners. Next time you’re alone, try tracing a bullet vibe along your vulva or shaft.

• Anal vibrator: You’ll learn more about butt plugs and anal beads later. Just know you can get vibrating prostate massagers too.

• Clitoral stimulation toy: As well as vibrating, this toy might offer clitoral suction to mimic the feel of oral sex. If you don’t usually orgasm from penetration alone, bring this toy into play next time you have sex with your partner. But only if you’re into total euphoria.

• Rabbit vibrator: Perhaps the most famous vibe of all, this one pleases inside and out. Rabbit vibrators are known for their little “bunny ears” which stimulate the clitoris while the rest of the toy goes inside you. Expect intense, blended orgasms.

Learn more in our Beginner’s Guide to Vibrators.

Butt plugs

Butt plugs should be in every anal play starter kit. These cone-shaped toys have a tapered tip and a flared base, meaning you can easily slip them into the anus without worrying about them getting lost inside you. Just be generous with water-based anal lube to avoid discomfort or tearing while you play.

Butt plugs can be used to gently stretch the anus before inserting something bigger, like an anal dildo or a penis. But that’s not the only reason to try one, especially if you’re intrigued by anal play.

When the pelvic muscles contract during an orgasm, a butt plug can intensify those pleasurable sensations, giving you something to squeeze against while stimulating the sensitive nerve endings of the anus. You can get some cute ones too, like this fetching jewelled plug or this lovely fluffy tail.

If you��re just starting out with anal pleasure, good for you. Use a butt plug or your fingers at first, never anything homemade (ask anyone who has ever worked in A&E why not).

Prepare for your first time by reading our guide: How to Use Butt Plugs

Anal beads

This sex toy looks like a string of beads, usually made from plastic, metal, or glass. The first few beads are small, slowly increasing in size, so you can enjoy more and more length and girth as you journey toward the toy’s base.

Anal beads can be used alone or to enhance sex and masturbation. They give you a “filled-up” feeling that many people find incredibly pleasurable and can transform a regular orgasm into an earth-shattering one. Think you can take it up a notch? Pull your anal beads out just before you orgasm for an even more intense experience.

With durable, smooth spheres that are easy to insert and remove, anal beads are ideal for all experience levels. If you’re trying anal beads for the first time, I recommend the beginner-friendly BASICS Anal Beads. That said, these gorgeous glass anal beads can’t be ignored.

Discover the different types of anal beads in our Beginner’s Guide to Anal Beads

Cock rings

First of all, she’s got a lotta names, honey. Known as a cock ring, stamina ring, love ring, or c-ring, this toy is designed to keep blood from flowing back down from the penis. This gives you a longer-lasting, harder erection and can offer mutual pleasure during penetrative sex.

Most cock rings have a textured, forward-facing vibrating protrusion that stimulates the clitoris during partnered sex, while others focus stimulation on the balls, anus, or perineum to thrill the wearer.

Typically made from stretchy materials like silicone, cock rings are easy to wear (so long as you go lube first). Put it on while you’re flaccid. As you grow harder, the ring will begin to feel nice as snug. It shouldn’t feel uncomfortably tight.

You can get cock rings in a few different styles, including rings that fit over the balls as well as the penis. Keeping those balls in place will also keep your ring in place, while offering a little extra exciting constriction. This is known as a cock and ball ring.

Like standard cock rings, cock and ball rings should be applied while you're flaccid. Slather plenty of water-based lube inside the rings and on yourself to make this easier. Slip your balls, one at a time, through the first ring. Once both balls are inside, slide the head of your penis through the other ring so that the cock rings surround your entire package.

Did I mention you can get vibrating ones? Oh yes. Vibrating cock rings stimulate both the wearer and their partner during penetrative sex. Like some dildos, some cock rings don’t vibrate on their own, but have a little pouch where you can slip in a bullet vibe.

Prep for your first time with our guide: How to Use a Cock Ring

Penis strokers and sleeves

Strokers are a go-to sex toy — with good reason. The basic idea is that you slip your penis (with plenty of water-based lube) into the toy and move it as fast or slow as you like. They’re easy to use but feel totally different to your hand, stimulating your penis from base to tip.

You’ve probably heard of the Fleshlight, which is beloved for its discreet design and textured insides. Technically, Fleshlight is a brand, but lots of people use the word to describe any male masturbator.

Let’s talk texture. Some strokers try to emulate the feeling of penetrating a vagina, anus, or mouth. You can even get them modelled on the vulva of specific star, like Violet Myers. They might be made with soft, hyper-realistic materials that feel just like skin. You can also get vibrating ones, warming ones and some vibrating warming ones. The male sex toy game really has had a glow up, lately.

Strokers are typically thought of as solo toys, but you can bring them in to partnered sex and foreplay. (I’m telling you, if you or your partner's jaw aches after 30 seconds of sucking, a stroker could be your new best friend). Check out some of the open-ended varieties like this reversible stroker, which leaves the tip of the penis exposed for licking or kissing.

You can also get penis sleeves and extenders, which are typically used for partnered sex. While some of them look similar to strokers, their main use is to make the penis feel longer or girthier. You can also use them to delay ejaculation since they reduce sensations for the wearer.

Ready to go? Check our guide on How to Use a Fleshlight

Love eggs and kegel balls

Discreet and sexy, love eggs are wearable sex toys that vibrate inside you for incredible G-spot and vaginal stimulation.

Love eggs are ideal for couple’s play, since you can control them using a remote. If you’re in a long-distance relationship, go for an app-controlled toy like the We-Vibe Jive 2.

Sounding irresistible? Check out our guide on How to Use a Love Egg

Kegel balls can be similar, but they have a different purpose. Also known as Ben Wa balls, these small, weighted toys sit inside your vagina and give your pelvic floor a workout. Think of it like strength training for your vagina. Kegel balls strengthen your vaginal muscles, which can lead to stronger orgasms while helping you squeeze tighter during penetrative sex.

You can wear kegel balls around the house as a form or exercise. But plenty of our customers find the weight and texture of the balls super arousing too. Wear them to build anticipation throughout the day — or during foreplay and masturbation.

Find out more with our guide: How to Use Kegel Balls