Lovehoney's Top Toys and Tips for Postpartum Pleasure

by Chelle

on 14 Mar 2023

Calling all top-tier mamas: this one’s for you.

We know that planning play dates, crossing off homework tasks, and running your mini humans from one club to the next is no feat for the faint-hearted. From keeping tabs on the groceries, to marathon-sprinting the school run before the start of your shift, you wear that ‘Wonder Woman’ cape like it was made just for you – and hey, we salute you!


But before you dust off your crown and set forth to steer the mothership like the modern-day heroine you are, let us let you in on a well-known secret: we’ve heard that all work and no play can start to feel a little dull. Contrary to what our grown-up children will one day choose to believe, parents just want to have fun, and here at Lovehoney, we champion that a healthy, happier sex life is for everyone – yes, you too, mama.

We’re here to remind you that time for you is essential and not every play date should start and end with hot drinks at the local soft play. Nah, forget about the hot choccie, this is about you living your best life once the kids are in bed and transforming into your sexiest alter-ego with the help of our top tips, tricks and toys. Remember, mums can have fun too!

Getting Back To Feeling Good

Postpartum, how we feel about sex and ultimately, ourselves, can change. It’s not that we become less sexy, it’s more that our perception on what sexy is can alter. You might find your body has changed, leaving you feel less confident than you used to be, or maybe the sleepless nights are catching up with you, tripping your libido over on the way.

If parenting has hit the pause button on your sex life, here are three ways to get you excited about intimacy again.

Slip Into Something Sexy


Trust us, there’s a ‘sexy’ lingerie for every mum, no matter how your body might have changed. If you’re still feeling a little conscious about your glorious mum-tum, a babydoll or chemise will highlight your very best assets while giving enough coverage to wear it with confidence.

If you’re pacing to get into something more skin-baring, but are feeling top-heavy still, an under-wired bra set could be the perfect option.

Have Fun With Foreplay


You want to get close to your partner, but sex still seems a long way down the road. Take it easy, Mama. Foreplay is perfect for being intimately connected without applying any extra pressure to your romantic situation. It’s a good way to explore together and find out what stirs your inner sex goddess into action.

Try role play costumes, add some flavour to your kisses, or get playful with an adults-only game.

Plan Date Nights


What makes you want to rip your partner’s clothes off and jump straight into bed? If the sight of your other half dressed up and polished turns you on, why not book a childminder and schedule some time away for you both to head out. Think a fancy restaurant meal, a cinema trip for two, or maybe head to your local night club to dance the night away.

Remember, if going out isn’t on the cards yet, there’s lots of ways to enjoy each other’s company at home too.

For Sexy Time on the Quiet

We know what it’s like… that gold-medal win once you’ve completed the successful tip-toe walk away from their bed without so much as a peep or stirring sound to stop you in your steps. So, why, once you’ve mastered the fine sport of floorboard hopping between the creakiest planks, would you do anything to sacrifice some time to yourself? Put simply, you don’t.

You’ve just got to assign the right toys to the mission in hand.

Looking for a way to enjoy sexy time on the quiet? Check out Lovehoney’s top picks for those whisper-quiet moments of pleasure.

Top Toys For Quiet Pleasure

For When You’re Feeling ‘Touched Out’

Look, let’s be real. We might love what those perfectly tiny hands can do – from the glorious finger-paintings we’ve taped to the fridge, to the mismatched beading necklace we wear with pride, but having them pull on our dress, snag our tights and twist our hair into a multitude of knots can be plenty enough to leave anyone feeling touched out.

So, it’s natural that when bedtime rolls round for them, but not for you, that sex and intimacy can be the last thing on your mind. But if you want to feel more turned on, than tuned out, here a few things to try.

Treat Yourself to a Massage

A slow, sensual massage can be great for getting those nerve-endings tingling with pleasure. It’s intimate and relaxing all in one and will let you enjoy the sensations of being touched in a much more romantic way. Using a massage oil or massage candle will enhance those all-over body strokes and will leave your skin feeling deliciously soft too.

Explore Sensory Play

Ever wondered what it feels like to be blindfolded? Or to be tickled all over by soft, fluffy feathers? By stealing one sense and exciting another, you allow yourself to be fully absorbed in the pleasures of touch alone. Introduce some new toys into your collection, like a feather tickler, satin restraints or subtle slip-on blindfold. To air on the side of kinky, you could try a flogger, paddle or pinwheel.

Be Self-Indulgent

Sometimes all you need is your own touch. Nobody else, nothing else. Spending time alone to explore your own body, needs and desires is often the best way to prioritise your self-pleasure. You don’t necessarily need to complicate things with toys, just go slow and allow yourself to become more familiar with what feels good.

When Postpartum Sex Still Feels New

If it’s all too soon to feel sexy, that’s fine. Things may feel different at first, your body is still adjusting to some pretty epic changes. You might find penetration less comfortable than before, or you might find yourself sub-consciously tensing up when it’s time to get intimate. A dilator set can be good for starting small, while wearing kegel balls can strengthen your pelvic floor muscles. At all times, lube can make things feel so much better.

Our Top Products for Postpartum Sex


Written by Chelle. Lovehoney Editorial Team
Chelle is a multi-published adult author who believes great sex starts with having the confidence to explore your fantasies in the bedroom.
A bondage and kink enthusiast, Chelle is also an advocate for BDSM education, and when she’s not writing blogs for Lovehoney, you'll find her planning for her next erotica novel.

Originally published on 14 Mar 2023. Updated on 14 Mar 2023