1. Reviews Page 1 - Suck-O-Mat Ultimate Milking Machine

      Average customer review 2 out of 5 stars16 reviews

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      1. Suck-O-Mat Ultimate Milking Machine

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    1. Customer Reviews

      Suck-O-Mat Ultimate Milking Machine 16 2 out of 5 stars 2 out of 5

      5 star
      213%
      4 star
      213%
      3 star
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      2 star
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      1 star
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      1. Suck-O-Mat Ultimate Milking Machine
      2. Suck-O-Mat Ultimate Milking Machine

        Our Price
        £199.99

    1. A great tease

      Reviewed: 16 October 2018 by kaigor, a Bisexual Single Male

      So the ultimate blowjob masturbator huh? Well it does not have any teeth to worry about, I'll give it that.

      Joking aside, in my personal experience with the toy this won't make you cum fast from a cold start. What this toy does really well is tease and edge you mostly hands free. You still need to support the toy to stop it falling off you, but if you're laying flat this takes almost no effort.

      Then just relax and let the toy suck and tease you for hours, literally hours if you want to. Then when you've had enough, just jack off to finish.

      It might be that given enough time on the highest speed and intensity this machine will get you off, but it's not going to be faster than a Fleshlight or your own hands.

    2. Overall Rating
      10 out of 10 stars
      Pros
      Teasing edging.
      Cons
      Nothing.
      Bottom line
      Ultimate tease machine.
    3. 2 people found this review helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Yes
    1. Blown away

      Reviewed: 04 April 2018 by SD-CJ, a Straight Married Male

      We received this item in typical Lovehoney fashion… Quickly and perfectly packaged.

      We couldn’t wait to get this opened and the first thing that will strike you is the smart looking packaging and above all else, the weight. You know this is a proper toy from that alone!

      Opening the box you’ll be met with the main body of the unit along with the neatly packaged accessories, all of which fit quickly and easily together.

      Plug it in, add some lube and you’re off, the controls are simple; one button for the strength of suction and one for the pattern. It’s really that simple, but don’t be fooled, the toy isn’t simple and will literally blow you away with the intense suction.

      As with the nature of a toy like this, there is a certain level of noise from the unit to create the suction, so no trying to use it somewhere quiet. But you can’t be surprised at that.

      All in all, a fantastic toy that will give you intense fun again and again. Highly recommended, you won’t be disappointed.

    2. Overall Rating
      10 out of 10 stars
      Pros
      Strength of suction, ease of use
      Cons
      Nothing
      Bottom line
      Fantastic
    3. Was this review helpful to you? Yes
    1. An excellent idea, almost executed very well

      Reviewed: 25 March 2018 by PhilJones, a Straight Going Steady Male

      I was lucky enough to be sent this toy to test in exchange for my honest review- a big thank you to the Lovehoney team for such an amazing opportunity, I am very grateful.

      This is the second hands-free style male sex toy which I have used, but the first that simulated oral sex. The concept is incredible and the finished product is almost as good, and certainly worth the price. As such I would recommend this toy to anyone who would like to move on from ordinary male strokers and would like to try hands-free masturbation.

      The toy arrived as per Lovehoney's excellent postal record in super quick time in a discreet brown cardboard box so that no one would know that was inside it. In fact, as I was away when it was sent out, it sat in the post office collection point for a few days and on collection I was not worried at all about anyone knowing what was inside.

      After collecting the toy from the post office my girlfriend and I frantically rushed home to open the box and play with our new toy. I've never driven so fast in my life! On opening and discarding the ambiguous brown cardboard box we were met with some exceptional sex toy packaging which gave an initial feeling that this toy would be of a premium quality.

      The box it comes in is glossy black and grey, with the name of band printed in a stylish gun-grey font, and the brand's logo embossed in red and grey. Inside the box, the toy is contained is dismantled and each part is snuggly placed in its own little compartment. The packaging really was exquisite, and made me very excited to try the toy- if the packaging was this great imagine how good the toy would be!

      However, the exterior packaging is where the presentation of the toy ends, unfortunately. The make and the look of the actual product is not at all to my taste The black box which controls the toys settings is made out of cheap looking black plastic, with large red plastic buttons on it to control the speed and level of suction, the intensity of which is displayed via LED lights on the box. Though the large plastic buttons are useful during play as it means it is easy to change settings, they only loosely fit, and I have some worries that if some lube were to get on them it may slide downwards into the mechanics of the motor. I also wonder if after some use the plastic casing may suffer some damage.

      Similarly, I did not like the colour of the penis sleeve. I found the translucent gold/brown quite unattractive. An opaque black or transparent sleeve would have been much more attractive in my opinion. The penis sleeve is made of a rigid jelly-like material, like a reinforced stroker with a pleasure ring at the base which is designed to assist in keeping the penis hard, increasing simulation, and ensuring that the sleeve stayed on the penis so as to make the simulation hands-free.

      The machine was easy to set up on following the included instructions, and I can not imagine anyone having any difficulty in doing so. However, the instructions did seem quite generic, and I wonder if they are mass produced to cover any similar toys in the range, rather than specifically for this toy.

      In use, this toy was quite frankly exceptional. After playing with the settings without my penis inserted in the sleeve, to get an idea of how the toy worked and what to expect, I placed a small amount of lube on my penis and in the sleeve and began to enjoy the toy. The first time that I used it, it made me orgasm in record time, and the orgasm was one of the most powerful which I have had to date. The suction on the lowest level is akin to the penis simply being in somebody's mouth, and at the highest setting it produces a level of suction which I'm sure no human could reproduce- it was exquisite. The speed setting controlled the regularity that the suction occurs- there are no moving parts, the stimulation is caused by waves of suction. At the lowest speed setting, it did very little to stimulate me as the suctions were too infrequent- it was just frequent enough to keep me erect. However, at the highest speed level, the waves of suction happen so quickly it left me gasping.

      My favourite way to use the toy is to have the speed on the highest setting from the start, and increase the suction gradually, with the highest suction level bringing me to the brink of orgasm, and then quickly dropping the suction level back to the first setting and building myself up again until I eventually let myself orgasm. Edging myself like this was amazing, and has intact helped me control myself better during penetrative sex with my girlfriend- it has helped me get a better understanding of when I am close to orgasm and how to control it when I am at that point.

      The unique selling point of this toy, and the reason that the toy carries quite a hefty price tag, is that it is hands-free. The first few times which I used it, I was dubious. I felt like I had to keep one hand on the base of the sleeve to prevent it from falling over, and the worry that it was going to did ruin my enjoyment of it slightly. However, the more that I have gotten used to it, the more confident I am that it is truly hands-free. This is more important than many people realise. It lets your other two hands roam all over other parts of your body; you can play with your nipples, anus or anywhere else you like to be touched. Having both my hands on me and having my penis simulated always leads to an absolutely mind shattering orgasm every time- especially when coupled with a vibrating butt plug or prostate massager.

      My girlfriend recently tied me up in a spreadeagled position on our bed and blindfolded me before inserting a vibrating butt plug and plugging me into this toy. She kept the butt plug and this toy on the lowest possible settings for over an hour while she teased me, before turning them both onto maximum settings. I had the most powerful orgasm of my life and she had to place her hands over my mouth to stop our neighbours hearing me. I would recommend this to anyone,

      This toy is very easy to clean with a few squirts of sex toy cleaner and a wipe.

      It is a shame about the presentation of the toy and the materials which the manufacturers chose to develop it in. However, in use it is truly amazing and would recommend it to anyone.

    2. Overall Rating
      8 out of 10 stars
      Pros
      Hands-free masturbation.
      Cons
      Colours and material used.
      Bottom line
      An exciting new way to masturbate.
    3. 6 people found this review helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Yes
    1. Great concept with a few drawbacks

      Reviewed: 21 May 2018 by CheesecakeAndNP, a Straight Engaged Male

      Lovehoney sent me this in return for an honest review. As always with Lovehoney, the item was securely and discretely packaged and arrived promptly. The box containing the toy is high quality as befitting a toy worth nearly £200. A sturdy box with carbon fiber-style covering showing that this is aimed at the male market (because carbon fibre automatically makes something better!). The toy does require a little bit of assembly but nothing requiring any tools and it's all done in a few seconds.

      I was really excited to give this a try and my fiancee was keen to watch me too. Having applied copious amounts of lube (yes, you really will need lots of lube to use this toy as it is intended), I slipped myself inside and turned on the power. Now, most reviews warn you about how noisy this product is and this review is going to echo those. It's loud. Really loud. Even knowing what others had written about it, I wasn't really prepared for the noise level even at it's lowest setting. On the plus side I suspect that a good quality pair of noise cancelling headphones would cope with this if you were using this toy solo and wanting to watch something stimulating.

      This toy is billed on the packaging as being hands free. It's not, not even a little bit. The sleeve your penis goes inside is quite heavy and the sucking motion will see it pop off within seconds. The sleeve is a jelly-like consistency with no rigid support and is smooth on the inside. As for the sensations the toy provides, this is not a quick, get the job done fast type toy. Think of it as more of a simulation of when you're with a partner who is giving your penis long, loving sucks and you won't be far off. This really will get the job done and it will be intense when it happens, but if you're in a hurry this is not the toy for you!

      I've taken a while to write this review as I wanted to give the toy a good shot at fulfilling its potential. What worked best for me was using this with my partner whilst we were fantasising with each other about having a threesome, with the toy taking the place of the third person. This obviously isn't for everyone, but it really enhanced the fantasy for us.

      So what would I change? The noise could be reduced substantially to make it easier to use without waking the whole house. There's only so many times people will buy that we're having to do some late night vacuuming! Whilst it is very similar to a blowjob, it's similar to having one performed by someone who doesn't have a tongue. I think that if there was texture to the penis sleeve it would heighten things immensely. I had considered cutting the end off a stroker and using this to line the sleeve but this is an expensive toy and I didn't want to break it!

    2. Overall Rating
      7 out of 10 stars
      Pros
      A really different sensation to anything else on the market, upmarket fee.
      Cons
      The noise, lack of texture on sleeve.
      Bottom line
      A good attempt that needs some development.
    3. 2 people found this review helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Yes
    1. Amazing idea, very realistic

      Reviewed: 29 March 2018 by zippo, a Straight Married Male

      I was kindly asked to test this for an honest review by Lovehoney and quite excited as I have never tried anything quite like this before.

      It arrived quickly as usual as always expected in plain packaging. I was quite surprised at how large the box was and how heavy this toy weighed. On opening the package it is in a high-quality black box and once you take the sleeve off the outside of the box there is no indication as to what’s inside so a great discreet box to keep it in.

      Inside you have a control unit finished in gloss black that is heavy and feels well made, some pipe a joiner and the sleeve and of course the power supply also an adapter so you can plug it in. The instructions are very basic just a picture of how it goes together, I sort of expected more than that for the price.

      Anyway onto the toy itself the only thing I didn’t like was the smell and colour of the sleeve it has a very plasticky/chemical smell that was still there after washing and it is sort of a light brown colour. After fitting it all together plugged it in and powered it up the first thing noticeable is it is quite noisy even on low settings nothing a bit of music wouldn’t drown out though.

      So lubed myself up well got nice and hard slipped it on, turned both settings on low and wow feels really good holding it lightly it worked its way slowly up and down with a great realistic sucking action just like a blowjob. Turned up the speed and it gets quite a bit quicker but the stroke gets a lot shorter but still feels good turned up the suction and it can really suck hard but the thing I found disappointing is that the sleeve isn’t long enough and you tend to get sucked on to the little hole at the end and while it feels great it just is not fast enough for me to orgasm, very nearly but not quite.

      The noise when it got going didn’t bother me at all but on full power, it is a bit noisy. I couldn’t get it to work completely hands-free as the sleeve is fairly heavy and sort of flops over to one side and comes off but with some experimenting, I think I could find a position that would work, I’m quite surprised that it didn’t come with some sort of suction mount.

      Cleaning is easy it all comes apart a bit of toy cleaner and a rinse under the tap and good as new.

      Would I buy it? Probably not but if you enjoy a long slow blowjob then it’s probably for you. An excellent idea that just needs a bit of tweaking. I will be using it again but I think more as a fun bit of foreplay.

    2. Overall Rating
      6 out of 10 stars
      Pros
      Great realistic sucking action.
      Cons
      Not fast enough needs more power and a bit noisy.
      Bottom line
      Great if you like a long slow blowjob.
    3. 1 person found this review helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Yes
    1. Left slightly underwhelmed

      Reviewed: 03 February 2018 by Toyjoyman, a Straight Engaged Male

      I was looking forward to a machine that could give me a different type of experience. When I think suction, I think of lips and a blowjob. This machine promised a nice sensation to experience with the variety of being able to use the tubing on pumps or other things that it can fit onto.

      When I got the toy I was excited, looking forward to seeing what this thing would do to me. Unpacking I felt the unboxing experience was good - a sleeve and a two-part box that feels sturdy.

      The machine itself isn't that elegant, quite cheap, but doesn't need to look fancy as its job is what you pay for.

      The sleeve was fatter than I thought it would be and I was disappointed to find the internal texture was just flat. I was slightly bummed out about that, but nethertheless I got myself set up to try this out.

      With an empty house, a bed and a good amount of lube I slipped inside and turned the power button on. At first I was intrigued at how it felt. Never felt a machine that sucks before as they've always been too expensive.

      It slowly slips down you and rises back up as the suction releases, and increasing the speed makes it seem like it just decreases the stroke length, which is kinda disappointing again. The strength of the suction at the start is ay. It'd never get me off though. I cranked it to 5 and enjoyed for a moment, the full sleeve sucking the tip of me, but my enjoyment never lasted long.

      Reason being is because the machine seems to require you either to balance it or hold it somewhat. You can't hold it onto you too hard, otherwise the suction gets cut off as it's not moving and creating the space it needs to re-suck again. This along with the mismatched suction levels created some worry in the back of my head. I assumed my machine was somewhat broken and I'm still not sure if this is the intention of the manufacturers or if my machine is faulty.

      Nevertheless the mismatched suction levels almost ruin this toys potential. I thought it would be obvious that if you had a suction toy that stays on you via suction that the initial suction down your penis would be stronger than the one that pushes it out. For some reason the toy when left to its own devices will just flop you out of it, meaning I can't focus too hard on something else or let it do its work on its own. You have to fondle around with it, either getting the sleeve semi stuck between your legs so it's always slightly pushed onto you or you have to manually wiggle your way back into the toy.

      Having said that, even though the sound of this is incredibly loud (no way you can use it without something being heard) it was a nice feeling when it did work. I just wish that it worked the way I expected it to.

      Then again i'm not sure if my product is at fault for that or if that's just the way the machine works.

      Either way the toy has more uses thankfully that just using a stoker and i'll experiment more with it.

    2. Overall Rating
      6 out of 10 stars
      Pros
      Suction feel, mixture of different things I can attach the tube to.
      Cons
      Sound level, mismatched suction levels, weight of the sleeve and lack of texture.
      Bottom line
      A loud but inventive tool that probably could do with some tweaking.
    3. 2 people found this review helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Yes
    1. A very nice idea

      Reviewed: 20 January 2018 by stuart58, a Straight Single Male

      This is clearly a very new idea. Unlike strokers or similar toys this has no moving parts. It relies in the pules suction from the pump.You really do need to experiment with this to get it right. I can't understand why its never been done before. So how does it feel?

      Well actually not bad at all. The maximum pump suction could do with being just a little more, but that said its actually not bad.

      I think that the sleeve should be a little more rigid on the outside. It's a little too flexible and you don't get the stimulation that could be provided. Also, and I haven't tried this... the addition of an egg vibrator secured to the outside of the sleeve would serve to greatly add to the stimulation.

      The Suck-O-Mat is new innovative and a great idea.

    2. Overall Rating
      6 out of 10 stars
      Pros
      Stimulating, easy to clean.
      Cons
      A little noisy in a quiet environment.
      Bottom line
      Not bad at all.
    3. 1 person found this review helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Yes
    1. Powersteering for your hand but you need perseverance and soundproofing

      Reviewed: 03 April 2018 by jackjohn, a Straight Married Male

      I was lucky enough to receive this free as a toy to test - thanks Lovehoney, I've wanted to try something like this for ages.

      The toy is made of four parts. A power supply (with a euro plug and UK adaptor), a pump with two buttons controlling power and speed, a tube, and a jelly penis sleeve.

      The packaging and appearance of the toy look very professional. Sleek and glamorous. The parts are very easy to fit together. The jelly penis sleeve feels great with and without the pump operating. For me, however, the toy didn't live up to my high expectations.

      The pump alternates between suction and blowing to create motion and sensation. I think this might work better if the blowing part were reduced as this part of the cycle moves the sleeve up the penis and the weight of the sleeve tended to then make it fall off. Greater suction wouldn't go amiss. I could not achieve hands-free use. It's more like power- assisted masturbation. It might be useful if you have reduced grip strength. With some experimenting I found pleasurable angles and sensations.

      I can't fault the construction or materials used. The sleeve and tube are robust and easy to clean. I operated the pump for at least 30 mins continuously and it didn't seem to get hot or struggle at all, although it is very noisy and vibrates vigorously. I left the pump running and could hear it all over the house. It was quite distracting. The pump is also quite large (13 x 20 x 8 cm), and is not something you could easily travel with.

      I will keep using this; I think it will take practice and experimentation.

    2. Overall Rating
      4 out of 10 stars
      Pros
      Nice sensations. Robust. Looks good.
      Cons
      Noisy. Bulky. Not hands-free.
      Bottom line
      Fun to be had here, but noisy and pricey.
    3. Was this review helpful to you? Yes
    1. Not brilliant

      Reviewed: 01 May 2018 by Dannylew, a Gay Engaged Male

      Order arrived quickly, on time and discreet as per all my other orders.

      Product is carefully and securely packaged. Once the outer box is removed, the product box looks and feels strong, luxurious and expensive.

      Upon opening the box the motor and all of the accessories are kept neatly and firmly in place with added foam interior, which adds to the luxury feel of the product. The instructions which are included inside the box are generic to a vast selections of sex toys on the market. You receive one small piece of paper with a basic diagram of how to assemble the toy. The toy is very self-explanatory, so most wouldn’t have an issue assembling the product.

      Once the toy is set up and turned on, you have two buttons - one for speed and one for intensity, each with five different levels which are indicated by LED lights. This product is quite noisy, so it is something you would want to use whilst no one else is in the house if you don’t want them to know what you are doing.

      Using the product is extremely simple. Just add a little water-based lube to the sleeve of the toy and a little to yourself and pop straight in. When using the toy I personally felt it was not realistic or even remotely similar in any way. When both the intensity and speed is down low - on the 1-3 settings the toy does offer a small amount of stimulation. However, it was not enough to keep me going, which caused everything to go floppy.

      When the toy is used on the 4-5 settings on both speed and intensity I found the toy is very erratic and falls off the penis if you don’t hold it on for yourself. The suction of the toy when on full speed literally sucks the head right to the top of the sleeve, which is extra uncomfortable when you do hold it in place.

      I have used this toy with different amounts of lube on both the penis and sleeve, used the toy when floppy, semi and hard and used with a partner. All attempts fail as the toy offers no real stimulation and feels very abnormal and unpleasant.

      All in all it is a great idea. However, the ability behind the machine is lacking for the price tag.

      I would personally say that, if you are looking for a good stimulating toy, I would opt for other toys which Lovehoney sells such as Fleshlights as in my opinion they offer more stimulation and mind-blowing orgasms.

    2. Overall Rating
      3 out of 10 stars
      Pros
      Sleek look and design.
      Cons
      Noisy, no stimulation, bulky.
      Bottom line
      Average product, needs some work.
    3. Was this review helpful to you? Yes
    1. Suck-O-noise

      Reviewed: 10 February 2018 by sexytime87

      I was searching through Lovehoney's site and I found the Suck-O-Mat. I showed this to my partner and we though that it would be something good to try. I have used strokers and masturbators before, so I thought this would be the next thing to try.

      Whenever I have ordered something from Lovehoney I know that my parcel will always be discreet and nobody apart from me and my partner will know what is inside. This is one of many reason we order from Lovehoney quite frequently.

      When the parcel came I was excited to see what this sucker could do. I did notice that the box was really quite heavy, so was expecting this to be a good sign. Once I got into the brown box I saw the box that the Suck-O-Mat came in. This I would say will be good for storing this toy. I would say though if you have limited space then you may wish to take this out of the box and keep it in a drawer?

      Being a man that has tried most other products for penis stimulation, I really was wishing that I had found the next best toy for me. After taking all of the contents out of the box I had a quick look at the instructions. These were very basic and looks like they have been written for all of the toys that this company sells. They do not have to write a specific one for every toy they have. This didn't faze me, but I thought it was well, basic.

      I saw myself how this fitted together, so I slotted it all in it's place. The one thing I wasn't too sure about was the plastic connector that slotted the two different sized tubes together. Surly this didn't need to be there. I can see that in some cases if you needed an extra bit of length then, yeah great idea. If not then the longer tube could be used and just have a plastic part at the end of the penis sleeve.

      It really was easy to put together and stayed together well. The housing unit for the motor was nice and glossy, giving a more "styled" look. This was the part of the toy that was quite heavy - just bear that in mind when you are thinking of buying this. There are two buttons on the motor housing one that controls the speed and one to control the intensity. Being a mains-powered toy I thought that this was going to pack a right punch.

      I thought I would turn the toy on before using it to get to know the buttons and see what I thought I may like. The first few settings on the toy are not too bad, but as son as you turn the speed and intensity up to the max there is one really big problem. The noise! Dear or dear. I think this toys much nosier than our washing machine. I think that this will be one thing that will put others off. If you have thin walls or you are living with others then this will certainly put you off using it when they are around.

      I let it suck onto the palm of my hand and I just thought it was a different sensation. It was definitely something I was going to have to get used to. I waited for my partner to get home, so we could see what this was like together. She was just as excited as I was to see what this baby could do. With all the noise we heard we really thought we were onto a winner here.

      I applied some water-based lube to me and the sleeve then slid myself inside. Now this was another thing that this toy lacked - length. I will never claim to be the biggest man, but I wouldn't say I was the smallest either. This only managed to stimulate the tip of my penis. I was a little let down at this point, but continued to use it.

      My partner turned both of the settings to the max and let it do its thing. I really wasn't getting a lot out of this at all. I wanted something that could suck most of me not just the tip. I had to keep telling my partner to lift the sleeve up as I kept hitting the top of it. It was really cool to see the sleeve going up and down on its own, though, and performing a sucking like sensation.

      After around 15 minutes of this I had to tell my partner to stop as it just wasn't doing much for me. I think what this toy needed was the following:

      1. More intense sucking action

      2. A quieter motor

      3. longer sleeve or possibly different length sleeves to suite all users

      If this toy was made to have these features on it I think it would be one of my dream toys. Personally I don't think I would get this out very often it will only be used for foreplay. I really did have high hopes for the Suck-O-Mat, but it didn't suck up to me!

      I would recommend this to men with a smaller package or men who like the head of their penis being stimulated. If you have somewhere to use this without being heard then you are onto a winner! I suppose we are all different and what I thought about this may be completely different to another's opinion.

    2. Overall Rating
      3 out of 10 stars
      Pros
      The idea of the toy.
      Cons
      The lack of power. How noisy it was. The length of sleeve.
      Bottom line
      A really good idea that still needs some work.
    3. 1 person found this review helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Yes
    1. This is really really rubbish

      Reviewed: 06 August 2020 by Jack1904, a Straight Single Male

      Bought this thinking for £200 it would bring me and my wife a little bit of a laugh and some fun nights. But no, not at all.

      Absolute waste of money. Better off buying a Fleshlight for a quarter of the price. Am I entitled to my money back Lovehoney?

    2. Overall Rating
      1 out of 10 stars
      Pros
      That carbon fibre box.
      Cons
      Everything else.
      Bottom line
      1/10.
    3. Was this review helpful to you? Yes
    1. Breathtakingly awful

      Reviewed: 16 June 2018 by doctorgasm, a Other Going Steady Male

      The best thing about this device is the cardboard box that it comes in; it's a lovely box, it really is.

      However, the "Suck-O-Mat Ultimate Blow Job Male Masturbator" itself is, without doubt, the worst and most useless sex toy that I have ever tried. Yes, I did read the negative reviews but decided to give the benefit of the doubt based on the product description and Lovehoney's reputation, so I took a punt on it anyway. I wish I hadn't wasted my time and I am left wondering why LH even sell rubbish like this.

      The noise it makes isn't as bad as others have made out, even on maximum, but that's about as positive as I can get about the device because it fails massively on every claim made about it. It just doesn't do the job and doesn't even come close.

      At least the advertisers speak highly of it!

    2. Overall Rating
      1 out of 10 stars
      Pros
      The fact that I can return it.
      Cons
      The fact that it doesn't do what it's supposed to do.
      Bottom line
      It is completely useless.
    3. 1 person found this review helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Yes
    1. Concept is there, but execution is bulky and lacklustre

      Reviewed: 16 April 2018 by DavidB1986, a Gay Married Male

      Full Disclosure: Lovehoney sent this to me free of charge in exchange for my honest review.

      Oh, I really did have high hopes with this product. I wanted to give it every opportunity to impress me, hence why it's taken me so long to get this review done; I was practically begging with the Suck-O-Mat to just actually do something for me; but I feel my desperate begging just fell on deaf ears...

      The Suck-O-Mat arrives in a truly enormous (and heavy) box. The postman certainly was looking at me quite quizzically as he handed over the package. In terms of packaging and presentation, it's actually quite nice. It's packaged securely and the box does double up a storage box once it's time to put it all away (which is handy).

      Putting it together is relatively straight-forward and intuitive (although they do include a nice set of instructions just in case). This is run from an EU plug, but Lovehoney are kind enough to throw in a converter for you (which is a fantastic little touch - Kudos to you - especially for the price tag of this).

      The components consist of the heavy control box, which is mains powered, and controls the level of suction and the speed. There is the masturbation tube, which is solid, heavy and made from flexible TPE which is relatively odourless. Once you have connected it up, You just need to apply lube and then switch it on and away you go.

      And that's where it all falls apart. The idea is that you turn it on, and then slip your penis inside; it's supposed to grip onto your penis and then... stroke it... whilst you just lay back and enjoy yourself. Unfortunately, the sleeve is so incredibly heavy that it just sort of... flops to one side. This makes it quite difficult to actually get a good seal around your shaft, so the Suck-O-Mat just sort of... flops around like a fish that's been out of the water too long and is slowly dying.

      The difference in suction between the lowest setting and highest setting is, truthfully, very minimal. The different speed settings are good; there is a nice variation. But the problem is that you kind of have to hold the sleeve in place (hands-free the box said... no), which then negates all the suction and the need for the 'speed'. In the end, it just feels like a gentle tickle, and not the intense blowjob sensation that I was expecting (and was promised!).

      Can we also just talk about the noise? It is so LOUD. It's not something you could use discreetly. I'm pretty certain my neighbours gave me a funny look the day after I used it for the first time. 'I was just doing some.. DIY... '. At 10pm a night? I'm sure they bought it...

      I've tried so many different ways to try and get it to work. More lube. Less lube. Standing up and 'resting' against a table... No way could give me the sensation that was pleasurable enough to lead me to orgasm. Perhaps that's not what this device is for? Maybe this is for REALLY long drawn out sessions that last for hours and hours... Well unfortunately I just don't have that kind of time, nor the desire to be masturbating for hours. Those of you who might be looking for a budget version of the 'Venus' will be sorely disappointed. With an increase in power (and perhaps a lighter sleeve) - this could be so much better. But right now, if I was to have paid for this, I would be very much in tears.

    2. Overall Rating
      1 out of 10 stars
      Pros
      The components feel strong and good quality.
      Cons
      The sensation! It just doesn't work at that well, and it's disappointing.
      Bottom line
      Promised a lot, offered very little. Not for me...
    3. Was this review helpful to you? Yes
    1. Noisy

      Reviewed: 30 March 2018 by Tattooed Barbie, a Straight Going Steady Female

      Me and my partner were excited to try this, however, the noise soon put us off. It's been difficult finding the time to try it simply due to the noise. It sounds like a hospital machine that helps you breathe.

      The product itself seems well made, it's simple enough to put together. The box doubles as storage and it's a good idea, however, there are too many cons for me to recommend this. The feeling my partner said is okay however it's not something that's a turn on.

      I feel the idea is there but perhaps some tweaking is needed to perfect this machine.

    2. Overall Rating
      1 out of 10 stars
      Pros
      The idea.
      Cons
      The noise.
      Bottom line
      I wouldn't recommend this.
    3. Was this review helpful to you? Yes
    1. Updated Review

      Reviewed: 16 February 2018 by stuart58, a Straight Single Male

      The Lovehoney system does not let a user edit a review, so I have done a second... Basically, as before, this product really is a good idea, but after some use I can now give a much more accurate review.

      As already stated, this relies on a pulsed suction to do the job. There are no moving parts. I have used this now for a few times and there are flaws with it. Firstly the sleeve itself is a type of jelly type material which in my opinion is too flexible. The so-called pleasure ring really needs to be more substantial. The vacuum pipe keeps slipping out of the sleeve, which is dammed annoying. And as others have said, the pump is really noisy. It has five levels and I can tell you anything above five is, well, let\s say you don't need anyone else in the house. It is so very noisy!

      I had high hopes for this when it arrived and I am sorry to say it just does not deliver. I did buy an egg vibrator that I taped to the side of the sleeve to try to add to the stimulation. It does work actually, but even with that I would not recommend this to anyone.

      Like others have put it. needs tweaking. Perhaps a mk2 version would be an improvement. To be honest I was so disappointed with this. I have since thrown it away.

    2. Overall Rating
      1 out of 10 stars
      Pros
      A nice idea.
      Cons
      Too noisy.
      Bottom line
      Not recommended at all.
    3. 1 person found this review helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Yes
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