Cillacat wrote:
long sensual big O that i used to get when he was well.
Have you experimented enough to know what kind of vibrations you respond best to? I love my iroha sakura but it doesn't lead to long sensual orgasms for me. More like mindblowingly intense and a reasonable replacement for one kind of orgasm I get with the real thing, but not long and sensual.
Do you know about edging? Where you start slow, build up a bit, let it back down, and so on until you're ready. That's how I get something long and lingering. Best for me are low speeds focused on the clit with something inside to clench around. Using kegel balls regularly helps too.
Low speed and focused is the opposite of a wand of course. I'm in the minority on this, at least amongst people currently posting on the forums. Something as powerful as a wand gets it all over far too quickly to be satisfying and leaves me too numb to try something else. Taking a break from vibes (for other reasons) let me regain better sensitivity and learn how to really use subtler vibrations.
Would your husband be able to hold and caress you? Any sort of contact would bring in more sensuality and some of what you're missing.
Welcome to the forums Cillacat.