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  1. my boyfriends fantasy is to have sex with me up the bottom :0

    Wildcherry [sign in to see picture]
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    All the advice so far about preparing i +1. However i have to agree with Ruby, my partner is vwe as have been some previous partners but i kinda never prepared. Just lots of lube and relaxation as even with butt plugs i still find myself tensing (im certainly not new to anal) so im no 100% sure if it makes it easier.

    naughtywildfun90 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
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    • Joined: 14 Mar 2012

    I felt exactly how you do now about 3 years ago.
    My first peice of advice, buy and use an anal douche. That way you'll know its clean and there's less risk of "mess" and embarrassment.

    Second please don't just lube up n stick it in, warm up with a finger, small butt plug, it probably will be a lot more painful if you just "go for it"

    Third is relax, if you arent relaxing or resisting it will definitely be painful. Try to enjoy the experience and take it slow, if you feel uncomfortable at any time ask him to stop and maybe try again after a few minutes

    Four, love the lube! The best one we've used is maximus. Use as much as you feel you need don't be scared of using it

    DavidB1986 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
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    • Joined: 11 Feb 2009

    Lube (lots and lots of lube) and BUCKETS OF PATIENCE

    These things alone are worth their weight in gold when it comes to prepping yourself for anal play.

    As others have said, it'd definitely not something you want to rush into. You need to make sure that you are really happy to try it. Doubt and anxiety will lead to a very painful experience - believe me.

    The best thing to do, is to take it slow. Don't jump straight on his penis (or let him just thrust it in) - there will be tears from both of you (his will be because you would have smacked him right round the head).

    Addressing the cleanliness issue, you can buy douche's for the anal canal - a simple lukewarm water solution is sufficient - NEVER use any soap or anything like that when douching. Not only will it hurt like hell, but you could do damage.

    When it comes to the act itself, start either with fingers, or a small buttplug. Use plenty of lube and reapply as often as you feel necessary. Leave it at that. Don't feel you need to get straight down to it. Spread it over a few nights, allow your muscles to get used to the sensation (the first time something goes 'up' it may trigger some other feelings (like needing to go to the toilet etc) - this is all perfectly normal. As you progress, increase the size of the object - maybe go for some anal beads, then an anal dildo/vibrator. Always remember to replenish that lube and STOP if you feel discomfort. It's very delicate down there!

    You could use a desensitizing gel. They 'numb' the area and help make penetration more comfortable. A word of warning though - by using numbing agents, you are putting yourself at risk of injury, especially if you are too liberal - you might not feel the pain straight away if they are a little too rough.. so use those with caution.

    If you choose to explore with anal sex, I wish you the best of luck. Just remember, you are the one in control - and always begin sessions with lots of loving foreplay (perhaps he could give you a nice sensual massage to help you relax - being relaxed when playing anally is SO IMPORTANT!).

    But don't feel you have to do it though, just because he likes it. I disagree with him'n'her - Yes we all want to please our OH's, but not at the expense of my happiness or comfort. I would never make the OH do something he wasn't comfortable with, just because I like it - and vice versa. Whilst I am happy to please him, and vice versa - there still needs to be a certain level of respect in the bedroom.

    Citygirl2810 [sign in to see picture]
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    the first time i tried anal was with an ex - it wasnt planned, i found myself begging him to do it to me. he was massive, because i was so aroused and wanted it so much he simply pushed it in bit by bit and gave me a good seeing to I LOVED IT. i think being relaxed is the key


    [suspended user]

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    • Rank: Field Marshall
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    • Joined: 12 Sep 2010

    As allways great advice from every one. the only thing I would add after Lube, lube and more lube is: that you take charge. You shuld not go straight to a huge cock. Fingers and plugs over a few weeks to get you ased to th idea.If your OH is to excited and cant wait you may need to do this on your own. Then when you are going to do it you take charge. This will be a huge turn on for your OH. Do it Doggy and you tell him he must'nt move or you will stop. He can line it up for you put he must not push. Then and only then do you, whilst holding your checks open slowly back on to him. Like this you can allow your butt to open and take him in at your pace. Remember your butt hole is a tight ring and when the head of his penis pops past this it is a bit unusual not painfull, but that is the hardest bit over When my OH did this for the 1st time I was coming before I was even half in. Amazing. Iam Big and she is less than average in size but like you she really wanted to do it, as we were both Botty virgins.

    StHubbins [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
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    • Joined: 11 Jul 2011

    It's been a long time (years) since we had full anal sex. Lots of toys and fingers now, but I thought my penis was a no-no from then on.

    Then last night my OH said she wanted to have anal sex again some time. Not straight away, but it is on the table.

    Draven [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Colonel
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    • Joined: 7 Jul 2010

    open up the strap on pages here at LH and say "you first" with a wink......... ;)

    but theres little i can honestly add that hasn't been said already. first time with his penis you should take control, hold it firmly and ease yourself onto it at your pace. if it gets to much, stop, try again etc.

    but you should also never feel pressured so only do it if you want too. :)

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