• Sex and smoking

    1271890408
    Columbus [sign in to see picture]
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    Personally, it wouldn't turn me on. My OH is a smoker and I loathe it. After twenty years or more of smoking it's taking its toll. He coughts and wheezes which is decidely un-sexy, it's stained his teeth, his fingers are sometimes stained yellow and obviously there's the smell. I don't like kissing him really because of it, plus it gets in his hair, clothes - just all over. Yuk...

    However, I can get that some people might like the imagery - just without the stench and related health conditions!!

    1271892383
    mimiaow [sign in to see picture]
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    Theoretically, I do actually get the appeal of the scenario Foot_Lover described... I'm not a smoker, and generally don't like to be around smokers (I have absolutely no problem with it, I just don't like second hand smoke), but the image is a huge turn on for me. I would really prefer it not to be, but the last guy I was seeing was pretty much a cigarette-junkie (perhaps like you Avrielle_Aniko?!), and I found him terribly attractive when he lit up. The minty-cigarette-y after taste wasn't the best by far, but not too bad! However I have to say that I don't find it an attractive trait in women (unless, like a previous poster mentioned, she's from the 1940s and belongs in the film noir genre!).

    1271892428
    mimiaow [sign in to see picture]
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    Columbus wrote:

    Personally, it wouldn't turn me on. My OH is a smoker and I loathe it. After twenty years or more of smoking it's taking its toll. He coughts and wheezes which is decidely un-sexy, it's stained his teeth, his fingers are sometimes stained yellow and obviously there's the smell. I don't like kissing him really because of it, plus it gets in his hair, clothes - just all over. Yuk...

    However, I can get that some people might like the imagery - just without the stench and related health conditions!!

    Actually, you summed it up rather well! :)

    1271892958
    Rowan [sign in to see picture]
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    Indeed; film noir smokers are hot, as wolverine Hugh Jackman smoking was hot. These are exceptions, as a habit I detest smoking, cannot abide the stench in my brother's flat (smokes rather a lot), the wheezing, the effect it has on your voice, the discolouration of skin, teeth, wallpaper etc. The entire thing is a huge turn off, wouldn't go near someone I knew to be a smoker (were I single) for a date. Teeth matter to me (I dislike my own) as does not knowingly inhaling carcinogens and developing Emphysema, lung or throat cancer, but then most men on one side of the family smoked (until dad) and for over 150 years only 3 of them saw 60. Smoking bad. Non smokers, sexier!

    1271895537
    Amykins [sign in to see picture]
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    oh no i wouldn't like it, i din't even like the smell. the smoke just suffocates me.

    1271935114
    SweetSubmission [sign in to see picture]
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    I am going to reread this thread every day until I have quit for good. So many of you are so anti, it makes me realise how unbelievably forgiving my nonsmoker OH is. I really want to quit, and I have a great additional incentive now. Plus, you all make me feel so ashamed!

    SS xx

    1271939776
    Student20 [sign in to see picture]
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    SweetSubmission wrote:

    I am going to reread this thread every day until I have quit for good. So many of you are so anti, it makes me realise how unbelievably forgiving my nonsmoker OH is. I really want to quit, and I have a great additional incentive now. Plus, you all make me feel so ashamed!

    SS xx

    There is was an article I read that talked about making it easier to quit smoking by turning it in to a game. You might want to read it if you're looking to quit but don't want to go cold turkey.

    http://www.escapistmagazine.com/news/view/96920-Quit-Smoking-With-MC-Frontalots-D-D-Ruleset

    1271940929
    SweetSubmission [sign in to see picture]
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    Thanks S20, I'll have a look.

    SS xx

    1271942098
    Cara Sutra [sign in to see picture]
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    Student20 wrote:

    There is was an article I read that talked about making it easier to quit smoking by turning it in to a game. You might want to read it if you're looking to quit but don't want to go cold turkey.

    http://www.escapistmagazine.com/news/view/96920-Quit-Smoking-With-MC-Frontalots-D-D-Ruleset

    I don't remember starting this!

    Heh.

    1271942686
    mimiaow [sign in to see picture]
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    SweetSubmission wrote:

    I am going to reread this thread every day until I have quit for good. So many of you are so anti, it makes me realise how unbelievably forgiving my nonsmoker OH is. I really want to quit, and I have a great additional incentive now. Plus, you all make me feel so ashamed!

    SS xx


    Absolutely good for you if you want to quit (good luck - I'm sure we'll be rooting for you, especially on this thread!), but I really don't think you should be ashamed for the choice of smoking. I don't want to go into the ethics of the tobacco industry (gods, I can be a bore :P), but if you're not forcefully blowing smoke rings into the faces of innocent pedestrians (or, more realistically, smoking in public places if others are around!), you shouldn't feel bad if other people happen to dislike it.

    Best of luck quitting!

    1271943424
    SweetSubmission [sign in to see picture]
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    Thanks Mimiaow. I am ashamed because I am an intelligent woman and I know this is a poor choice. It is very bad for my health, not to mention my bank balance. I don't make a habit of jumping under buses or stuffing my teddies with asbestos, so to make this choice seems very stupid, and I am ashamed that thus far, addiction has triumphed over sense. Hopefully, not for much longer!

    I'm feeling so ropey today that there is no way I want to smoke, can't think of anything worse when my sinuses are blocked and my throat is so sore, so today can be my first cigarette free day, easy.

    SS xx

    1271943897
    mimiaow [sign in to see picture]
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    Ah, fair enough (I am sorry, I would never imply that you're not intelligent!), that definitely makes sense.

    Urgh dear, that sounds awful. Are you coming down with a cold (and, very importantly, is there anyone contagious around that you can lay all the guilty blame on?!)? Honey and hot lemon drink? Well, I personally think honey's vile, so leave that out, but I hear it's rather good for soothing a rough throat. Hope you feel better soon, and good idea, looking on the bright side of feeling crappy! x

    1271944262
    SweetSubmission [sign in to see picture]
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    Goodness, you didn't imply anything of the sort! I just question my own sense when I do something I *know* damages my body.

    I've got a horrible feeling this is mumps, except that in theory, you can't have it twice and I've had it before. The symptoms are exactly the same as last time. As I said on another thread, my glands are so swollen I look like the love child of John Prescott and Jabba the Hut. Sexy, no?!

    Honey and lemon is a good call. I need someone here to bring me some, and ideally take the blame for having infected me! Ooooh, and back on topic, they could be my cigarette monitor and hide them away from me, and remind me when I start to struggle how much I want to quit. Any volunteers?!

    S xx

    1271944993
    SweetSubmission [sign in to see picture]
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    Avrielle_Aniko wrote:

    Hmmm. I think its silly to catagorise smoking in with stuffing teddy bears with asbestos. Smoking is sociable, and it wasn't that long ago that everybody smoked and it was as acceptable as a drink. It was rude not to offer a cigarette and rude not to accept, in the same way it was rude not to offer a drink of scotch or a cuppa tea.

    It's only now that the government and what not wants to get rid of cigarettes that it is considered an awful and disguisting habit. Drinking is about as dangerous as well, but they want to try and ban that aswell now. Yet drugs that are already illegal such as weed, is not as dangerous as alcohol or cigarettes. But they are just not taxed, not making money from it, and so considered 'bad'. Cigarettes and alcohol will turn the same way eventually too.

    Smoking did used to be almost universally enjoyed, but then we learned more about the science, and fewer people smoke now choose to smoke. For me, it's not about government legislation or about thinking that smoking is awful and disgusting, it's about knowing that it has a negative effect on my health. I'm certainly not one to be judgemental about other people, and in no position to criticise smokers! I just feel personally very silly for continuing to do something that I know is dangerous. That's why I made the deliberately silly analogy about asbestos bears - I'm exposing myself to an unnecessary hazard, and I really would like to stop.

    SS xx

    1271945028
    Student20 [sign in to see picture]
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    Avrielle_Aniko wrote:

    Hmmm. I think its silly to catagorise smoking in with stuffing teddy bears with asbestos. Smoking is sociable, and it wasn't that long ago that everybody smoked and it was as acceptable as a drink. It was rude not to offer a cigarette and rude not to accept, in the same way it was rude not to offer a drink of scotch or a cuppa tea.

    It's only now that the government and what not wants to get rid of cigarettes that it is considered an awful and disguisting habit. Drinking is about as dangerous as well, but they want to try and ban that aswell now. Yet drugs that are already illegal such as weed, is not as dangerous as alcohol or cigarettes. But they are just not taxed, not making money from it, and so considered 'bad'. Cigarettes and alcohol will turn the same way eventually too.

    It really isn't. Alcohol is dangerous in excess, whereas smoking any amount of [insert smokable thing here] is harmful. Your body has a natural ability to get rid of alcohol, so drinking a small amount doesn't hurt unless you have serious health problems already. Your throat and lungs haven't evolved any meaningful defense against all of the carcinogens in cigarettes/whatever besides trapping a small amount of them in mucus, coughing it up and swallowing it. The only affect the volume of cigarettes you smoke has is how quickly you end up with useless lungs.

    1271945314
    SweetSubmission [sign in to see picture]
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    Student20 wrote:

    It really isn't. Alcohol is dangerous in excess, whereas smoking any amount of [insert smokable thing here] is harmful. Your body has a natural ability to get rid of alcohol, so drinking a small amount doesn't hurt unless you have serious health problems already. Your throat and lungs haven't evolved any meaningful defense against all of the carcinogens in cigarettes/whatever besides trapping a small amount of them in mucus, coughing it up and swallowing it. The only affect the volume of cigarettes you smoke has is how quickly you end up with useless lungs.

    Reading that S20 makes me even more determined to stop. Thank you!

    SS xx

    1271945563
    Student20 [sign in to see picture]
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    I've done work on cancer so I know insider facts. And knowing how much it can affect your body is one of the main reasons I wouldn't want to get in to a relationship with a smoker, in the long run it isn't going to be fun for anyone. It's also one of the most expensive ways to die.

    1271945776
    Alicia D'amore [sign in to see picture]
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    Avrielle_Aniko wrote:

    Hmmm. I think its silly to catagorise smoking in with stuffing teddy bears with asbestos. Smoking is sociable,

    I don't agree that smoking is sociable anymore - if people smoke around me I can't help thinking that they can't like me that much if 1) they are happy to share their "sticks of death" with me, 2) they know I hate it yet do it anyway. I don't have a problem with smokers - but do it around me, and I do have a big problem!

    On the cigars - my Grandad smoked from 8 years old then switched to cigars thinking they were healthier....he died aged 49 from tar causing cancer by dripping inside his lungs - not sexy!

    For me, smoking is one of the most unattractive habits and I could never date a smoker.

    I also find *many* (not all!) smokers rude, they force their habit on others. I work in a posh restaurant and the staff smoke during work, they come back breathing that hideous smell into customers faces!

    I don't have a problem with thoughtful smokers who don't force it on me, if they want to wreck their lungs it's their choice - but force it on others and I have a massive problem!

    Ax

    1271945813
    SweetSubmission [sign in to see picture]
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    I usually smoke two packs a week, not an enormous amount, but a significant financial dent of around £12. I am therefore going to set £12 aside each week that I don't smoke and spend it on a weekend away with my mister. Jesus, I know the arithmetic is simple, but it is shocking to think that in just ten weeks I could be £120 better off just by stopping smoking. I definitely want a weekend away more than I want to continue to be a smoker!

    SS xx

    1271945861
    Alicia D'amore [sign in to see picture]
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    Oh and good luck giving up SS I'm sure you will succeed!!

    Ax

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