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  1. Swinging & the Single Man

    Strange Days [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 190
    • Joined: 15 Feb 2009

    From what I understand, its quite difficult for a single man, to get involved in the swinging scene. Would be very interested in any comments or views on this, from people who are involved.

    Single women are rare, but are very welcome - single men are common, but generally not welcome. This is based on what I have read. Does reality differ....?


    swingcouple [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Colonel
    • Posts: 161
    • Joined: 29 Jan 2008

    We have been on the swinging scene for a long time and would agree that it's probably most difficult for single men to get regular swinging meets. The reason is that most people like to be actively involved and pairs of both sexes ensure this; single men far outnumber the couples and single women who swing. From what we've seen, single guys usually struggle to get meets arranged on-line, but single men in clubs have more success, for instance she welcomes their attention when she feels the need to be a "greedy girl" in a club. Sometimes it isn't easy to get membership of a swinger club if you're a single man - there are often waiting lists - and you'll get charged more for entry. Single men usually pay more than MF couples, and single women often get in free.

    We've been to parties where there have been a few single men - Germaine Greer once said there ought to be more men than women at a sex-party as men need time to recover while women don't! But it's not easy to break into the party circuit as they tend to be held among circles of friends.

    Our advice would be to try and find a female partner to swing with; not necessarily to have a relationship with, but to come with you to clubs and meets; we know a few couples like that. Otherwise, join a club or clubs and get to know people socially as well as sexually and you may be invited to parties and home meets. Join a group like Fabswingers or Exchangists, write a good profile with interesting pics and don't give up trying for meets (it's time-consuming and often frustrating even for couples too).

    Good luck and we hope you have fun!

    Strange Days [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 190
    • Joined: 15 Feb 2009

    @swingcouple - Thanks for your reply. I have visited a local club, who warned me that its difficult. I could get membership, no problem - and yes event costs are higher for single man. The venue also runs fetish events, so I have joined for those to start with.

    Yes, I will concentrate on buildingup my social contacts. I have joined fabswingers, but need to work up my profile !!

    Thanks for your help. Fingers crossed I can make something happen. Its certainly fun....!!

    kelly_michelle [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 148
    • Joined: 15 Apr 2008

    I've had mixed feedback from guys I've met swinging. Some say they find it fairly easy to get meets, others really struggle. One guy I've met has next to no messages on fabswingers but can walk into almost any pub and will pull.

    The only advice is stay positive and keep trying. Also try the chat function on fabswingers, can be easier to chat than be one of a lot of messages that single women and couples get

    ghostgirl [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
    • Posts: 522
    • Joined: 26 Sep 2010

    Peter_matthews wrote:

    I found some great clubs info and some great people on [removed.] give it a go if you[']r[e] thinking about [supporting filthy spammers], Elite is simply the [spammiest]!!

    but posting it on 8 threads stinks of cheap advertising by the site owners


    Note from mod: Sorry ghostgirl, I edited the post you quoted, hope you don't mind!

    rose hip [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 1064
    • Joined: 19 Aug 2010

    not the first time either, GG. would someone else go through and report them? i've done it the last three times they've hit the site, but i just can't be arsed tonight. sighs. :-) there's a pile on the second page and the overly cheerful avatar is hard to miss.

    does anyone know if it's at least a legit site? or are they more of a phishing scam (where their main aim is to get email addresses and other private info from people)? the first is annoying, the second is dangerous.

    Despina Rose [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2581
    • Joined: 18 Apr 2010

    I have reported them, I hate people who spam.

    As for single male swingers, I think the problem is that lots of couples are looking for threesomes with a woman. Most of them aren't looking for men, especially not single men. If there are part of a couple then everyone gets to play so that isn't bad. There also seems to be a large amount of them and they do seem to be very pushy. I had to block all contact with single men as even though my profile said I was only interested in women they still contacted. Also, they only seem to say something like here is a pic of my cock, fancy banging it tonight babe?

    - Nicole [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
    • Posts: 417
    • Joined: 30 May 2012

    Ugh, sorry about that everyone. I'm going through and deleting them all now. The funny thing is, I don't think anyone on the forum would ever use their site after all this spam! Very very counter-productive.

    Anyway, thanks to everyone who reported it.

    ghostgirl [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
    • Posts: 522
    • Joined: 26 Sep 2010

    Lisa Clarke wrote:

    I just joined [removed] and loved it, give it a go!


    Tracey3x [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
    • Posts: 204
    • Joined: 27 Nov 2012

    I'm a swinger - i play as a single female AND a couple, and in both situations my preferance is single men joining me/us (as is the same for a lot of single fem's i know through this)

    It's not a case of single men aren't wanted, it's the ones who think they are god's gift and are pushy, arragant, rude and the ones who big it up then back out last second because they aren't what they had been saying they are and don't want to be caught out!

    I know a good few single guys who are known on Fab as some of the 'good ones' who get the meets because they are themselves, polite, non-pushy and don't have expectations - and the girls/couples like that!

    The theory that single males aren't wanted in swinging is complete b*ll tbh! They are wanted - a lot in some cases! - but not the idiotic rude pushy ones!



    Smokeyj [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant
    • Posts: 37
    • Joined: 27 Dec 2012

    theMightyBum wrote:

    I think all but one of the swinging threads should be locked, to cut down the available avenues for the spammers. It always seems to be swinging that they pick on!

    This might be a good idea.

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