• Share Your Best Ever Sex Tip!

    1334357013
    Nymeria [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1000
    • Joined: 26 Mar 2010

    I'm sure there have been a couple of threads on this but I wanted to make a fresh one based on the latest blog entry; 12 Sex Experts Share Their Best Ever Sex Tips - http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/blog/2012/04/12/sex-experts-reveal-best-sex-advice/ and the vote on the side.

    After reading through them I was torn between a few. I'm a firm believer of the concept of "give and take". I'd hate to be sexually spoiled by my partner one-sidedly although he does like to do this. I love how we both wish to spoil eachother. I ended up choosing "Dr Sonia Borg - 'sexual response cycle'" because I felt that it was very important to know what exactly turns us on and to go with that instead of relying on these so-called set tips like they have in Cosmo mags etc.

    I also like the options of using a blindfold (for another dimension) and the use of vibrating cockrings. The eye- contact came second choice for me too but I was put off at the the thought of us staring throughout the act. It just depends, really- I find eye contact very important and intimate for foreplay but whilst during, it doesn't matter so much.

    What are your thoughts on these sex experts' tips and what would your tip be?

    I'd probably say use the element of surprise but fundamentally communication is key. How else would you know that the other person is enjoying what you're doing? And going by Dr Borg's advice- "Studying your partner's breathing patterns, what their body does and when, where they like to be touched, how they like to be touched, timing, temperature, pressure, and the thoughts and sensations that carry them from arousal to orgasm is what will take your sex to the next level." I agree too; It's also about exploration and experimentation, together. =]

    1334357477
    kendo [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Captain
    • Posts: 49
    • Joined: 12 Mar 2012

    I think a lot of people just get on with the sex act and don't say what they want, or what they would like to do. The worse that could happen is their partner saying no.

    So, communication would be the best tip, or...

    I've found that if I kiss my wife's neck she'll do almost anything :)

    1334366526

    [suspended user]

    suspended user
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2668
    • Joined: 16 Feb 2012

    best sex tip...it is the most fun you can have without laughing,,,,,,,just have a laugh doesnt matter who comes when but it does matter who laughs last coz they laugh longest

    1334387559
    Lady.Gasm.X [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
    • Posts: 383
    • Joined: 31 Jan 2012

    kendo wrote:

    I think a lot of people just get on with the sex act and don't say what they want, or what they would like to do. The worse that could happen is their partner saying no.

    So, communication would be the best tip, or...

    I've found that if I kiss my wife's neck she'll do almost anything :)

    Hehehehehehehehehehehe, I know this feeling >:)

    1334390303
    Lovehoney - Alice [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 1327
    • Joined: 19 Jul 2010

    Avrielle_Aniko wrote:

    Another lengthy post. Apologies.

    Great post! Did you vote for Lou Paget's in the end...?

    1334415190
    Alicia D'amore [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 3406
    • Joined: 2 Feb 2008

    While that may be true - it *can* massively effect a person's confidence. From experience; I currently cannot partake in penetrative sex, this has been the case for more than a year. It's happened before and the first time I was devastated and felt completely unfeminine. Had my partner laughed it off, I'd have felt worse, I'd have felt like my insecurities were being dismissed. With support, it's become something that's no longer an issue but I needed that initial sensitivity and support before it could become something I could laugh about.

    All I'm saying is that a sense of humour *is* crucial for a good relationship - but it's also important to remain sensitive and appreciate how important things can be to some people.

    It's difficult to apply one rule to all relationships, all time points and all situations. It's important to read the situation and respond accordingly :)

    Adx

    1334419228
    Laveila [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2022
    • Joined: 8 Nov 2010

    I am with Alicia. Sex and communication about sex is often very important in a relationship. I also had some discussion about sex with my partner, for several reasons. Although at times we have other problems in the relationship as a regular couple, the issues in sex were completely unrelated to that. But by discussion we managed to sort the differences and it really paid off in the end. It maked me really more relax and start to enjoy sex knowing my partner knows my fears etc.

    Nevertheless I have to say that unsatisfaction in sex life can really lead to a breaking up of the pair. I had a friend who is into bsdm and also would like a bit of casual relationship when she would be able to to take other men in her bed. And her partner was the oposite - romantic, who would not even tie her hands. That could not work for long. and it did not. You cannot go on completely frustrated for years.

    Well, some can, I know someone who did not have sex for 20 years, because his wife gave up that long ago and he just does not feel like breaking free. And does not give him hug either, nothing. I am between admiring he is still faithful to her and bit feeling sorry for him.

    I know that in those cases even discussion would not likely solve it, if they are too different, but in some others it really can.

    So my best sex advice would be really be attentive and listen to your partner concerns if they bring some up.

    1334424242

    [suspended user]

    suspended user
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2668
    • Joined: 16 Feb 2012

    Laveila wrote:

    Sex and communication about sex is often very important in a relationship.

    So my best sex advice would be really be attentive and listen to your partner concerns if they bring some up.

    Laveilia I have selectively quoted your post I hope you dont mind.

    For me the question is not about communication but how you communicate, we dont talk much but we dont need to I can tel from body language what she likes and what she doesnt when she is or is not comfortable.

    Sex always was a major part of our lives, we slept together on our first date but our second date was exploring the beauty of the lake district, it is part of a whole not the be all and end all. In our darkest days when we were discussing splitting up, no sexual performance on her part would have changed my mind, however her love support and sympathy saw us through it...nothing at all to do with sex just a womans love.

    1334426566
    Laveila [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2022
    • Joined: 8 Nov 2010

    gunther wrote:

    Laveila wrote:

    Sex and communication about sex is often very important in a relationship.

    So my best sex advice would be really be attentive and listen to your partner concerns if they bring some up.

    Laveilia I have selectively quoted your post I hope you dont mind.

    For me the question is not about communication but how you communicate, we dont talk much but we dont need to I can tel from body language what she likes and what she doesnt when she is or is not comfortable.

    Sex always was a major part of our lives, we slept together on our first date but our second date was exploring the beauty of the lake district, it is part of a whole not the be all and end all. In our darkest days when we were discussing splitting up, no sexual performance on her part would have changed my mind, however her love support and sympathy saw us through it...nothing at all to do with sex just a womans love.

    Your situation is nice, but often those may not be about what you like, but also about problems, such as vaginal dryness, woman not reaching orgasm, sensitivity to different materials, previous bad experience, concerns, etc. Sex is fun, but often people have their issues and talk can really help. I came to my partner almost a virgin, with a pretty bad experience, and if he did not know my fear, I would just panic, instead he was very gentle and we took our time. And we still talk about anything if there are any concerns. Does not mean we talk constantly,but sometimes comes up.

    As for the second part, that is your experience, but some others will just see it different. Some may stand to the vows even when they have non sex, while others, when there are no responsibilities, like childern, morgate etc, will walk away, because the frustration is too much and they cannot imagine to spend their lives with partners who cannot satisfy them in sex.

    1334431106
    Nymeria [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1000
    • Joined: 26 Mar 2010

    Nice to see some opinions and feedback. I especially enjoyed AA's post. I can relate well to the points mentioned. I think I might have overlooked the "attention" tip.

    gunther wrote:

    it isnt a serious subject to me.....relationships are very serious but sex is just a small part of that, if a relationship is sound then normally everything is ok.

    The point is- as Ad/laveila said was that it's not the same for everyone... And there is no right or wrong way to perceive it. For others, it's not as simple as that.

    As for myself, personally- We do enjoy sex and have a laugh over it but we also realise that it's the time where we can really connect on a physical and intimate level. It is pretty important to us. And I'm saying this with a long distance relationship where we don't have the opportunity to do the act as casually as others. Like Laveila, I too was a virgin before meeting my partner so that communication really was essential and key.

    I'm not saying that sex is "everything" either but it is a fundamental component to my relationship and I'm sure to others (and I can accept it's not for everyone). =]

    1334431412

    [suspended user]

    suspended user
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2668
    • Joined: 16 Feb 2012

    Your situation is nice, but often those may not be about what you like, but also about problems, such as vaginal dryness, woman not reaching orgasm, sensitivity to different materials, previous bad experience, concerns, etc.

    As for the second part, that is your experience,

    as a married couple we have had to address all these issues and a lot more...we are growing older dryness and erectile dysfunction may become part of our lives but its part of living together........immediate solutions are lubs and laughs

    Of course it is my expierience what else can I quote from there are MUCH more serious issues can fall upon a married couple than slight differences in taste in the bedroom. This forum is fairly open minded but I could not even start to discuss what happened without most people getting completely the wrong end of the stick, on a forum it is difficult but we, together, had to cope and move on in real life.

    1334434122
    Laveila [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2022
    • Joined: 8 Nov 2010

    gunther wrote:

    as a married couple we have had to address all these issues and a lot more...we are growing older dryness and erectile dysfunction may become part of our lives but its part of living together........immediate solutions are lubs and laughs

    Of course it is my expierience what else can I quote from there are MUCH more serious issues can fall upon a married couple than slight differences in taste in the bedroom. This forum is fairly open minded but I could not even start to discuss what happened without most people getting completely the wrong end of the stick, on a forum it is difficult but we, together, had to cope and move on in real life.

    Yes, but the point is that while slight difference in taste in the bedroom may not be a breaking point for you, it can very easily be for someone else. Sometimes it could be sorted with compromises,sometimes the difference is just too big and cannot be sorted. Thats why I am trying to say comunication related to sex is the often a crutial part of the relationship. And the problems in bedroom my not always relate to problems outside the bedroom. Different sex drives, tastes, sometimes just worries etc...

    1334434615

    [suspended user]

    suspended user
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2668
    • Joined: 16 Feb 2012

    lavelia when faced with getting your house repossessed or serious criminal charges with no basis, how to massage the g spot and where my semen goes, becomes a very very minor issue.

    Thread closed

    This thread is closed, so no new messages can be posted.