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  1. On Top

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    Columbus [sign in to see picture]
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    Cool - thanks!

    My ex has had gfs ranging from size 8 to size 18 - he just likes women! lol

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    Alicia D'amore [sign in to see picture]
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    *Essay Alert*

    I struggle with on top - too painful for my joints. But we do tend to like, me on top but leaning down on to him so he's supporting me and thrusting....it's intimate. When I feel up for going on top properly I tend to feel a little awkward as others have said, but his reaction usually sorts that out, he loves watching my face. I can't "ride" him for long as my knees can't take it but we'll alternate between him doing the work and me doing the work.

    Love KPs suggestion of "counting" speeds out.....concentrating on the counting should take your mind of the awkwardness!

    And I do the thing of hovering around the tip of his cock and focus my movements there, I can make smaller movements that are less painful then as his sensitivity is increased

    Those worried about weight and size - I'm a size 8 - 10 and 9st 1 and I still worry about the little flabby bits round my belly and whether I'm too heavy for my OH, basically (I do have a point!) it's not worth worrying about it because if you are insecure (like I am) you have no reason to worry and would worry no matter what size you were! Honestly, stop worrying and just relax and enjoy yourself because noone will notice your "flabby bits" and I dunno about you lot, but I only draw attention to not so pretty bits that my OH had never even noticed by going on about them to him! Any guy on here will tell you that part of the sexiness of a lady on top is the sexy "wobble" when he can see you are just having a good time and just letting go and relaxing!

    Ax

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    Alicia D'amore [sign in to see picture]
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    Avrielle_Aniko wrote:

    Good advice there AW! Thanks. Needed your essay to read!

    *HUGS*

    Ax

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    Columbus [sign in to see picture]
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    meep [sign in to see picture]
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    Great thread - I'll be trying some of the ideas ASAP

    AndaW is right about the body image - I'm a lot more curvry than I should be, and am 3 stone heavier than when I got together with my OH, but I don't actually think men notice that the way we do. They see what they like (us) and don't seam to get why we're not happy with our bodies. The fact we actually have some curves mean they have something to get hold of, a really skinny girl is all boney, we're soft and yummy.

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    JayGee [sign in to see picture]
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    meep wrote:

    Great thread - I'll be trying some of the ideas ASAP

    AndaW is right about the body image - I'm a lot more curvry than I should be, and am 3 stone heavier than when I got together with my OH, but I don't actually think men notice that the way we do. They see what they like (us) and don't seam to get why we're not happy with our bodies. The fact we actually have some curves mean they have something to get hold of, a really skinny girl is all boney, we're soft and yummy.

    Before AdnaW gets her dander up, quite rightly and justifiably, all women are sexy whether well-upholstered or thin and all points in between.

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    Columbus [sign in to see picture]
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    i just realised I typed my 'ex' has had gfs ranging from size 8-18... Meant OH

    I think he does focus on the 'good' stuff but I mean I'm like 5 stone overweight so it's hard not to notice all the flab!! Anyway, I shall try and think fabulous thoughts and just enjoy!!

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    meep [sign in to see picture]
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    JayGee wrote:

    meep wrote:

    Great thread - I'll be trying some of the ideas ASAP

    AndaW is right about the body image - I'm a lot more curvry than I should be, and am 3 stone heavier than when I got together with my OH, but I don't actually think men notice that the way we do. They see what they like (us) and don't seam to get why we're not happy with our bodies. The fact we actually have some curves mean they have something to get hold of, a really skinny girl is all boney, we're soft and yummy.

    Before AdnaW gets her dander up, quite rightly and justifiably, all women are sexy whether well-upholstered or thin and all points in between.

    I would completly agree - all women are sexy, we shouldn't have to feel there is something not right with us if we don't fit a particular image, sorry if my post didn't make that as clear as it should.

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    JayGee [sign in to see picture]
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    meep wrote:

    I would completly agree - all women are sexy, we shouldn't have to feel there is something not right with us if we don't fit a particular image, sorry if my post didn't make that as clear as it should.

    Cool - I'm sorry to be a bitch but I do know that it's a sore point with our AdnaW, so I thought it better to save her blood pressure

    And you are so very right of course meep XXX

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    meep [sign in to see picture]
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    JayGee wrote:

    meep wrote:

    I would completly agree - all women are sexy, we shouldn't have to feel there is something not right with us if we don't fit a particular image, sorry if my post didn't make that as clear as it should.

    Cool - I'm sorry to be a bitch but I do know that it's a sore point with our AdnaW, so I thought it better to save her blood pressure

    And you are so very right of course meep XXX

    lol - your not a bitch - I'd rather be pulled up ASAP if something I said was open for misinterpratation and clarify it straight away. It can be difficult to communicate without tone of voice and facial expression

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    Alicia D'amore [sign in to see picture]
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    JayGee wrote:

    meep wrote:

    Great thread - I'll be trying some of the ideas ASAP

    AndaW is right about the body image - I'm a lot more curvry than I should be, and am 3 stone heavier than when I got together with my OH, but I don't actually think men notice that the way we do. They see what they like (us) and don't seam to get why we're not happy with our bodies. The fact we actually have some curves mean they have something to get hold of, a really skinny girl is all boney, we're soft and yummy.

    Before AdnaW gets her dander up, quite rightly and justifiably, all women are sexy whether well-upholstered or thin and all points in between.

    I like you ....even if I'm not sure what dander means

    Ax

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    Alicia D'amore [sign in to see picture]
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    And don't worry meep - I have a thing about people skinny bashing when they mean to express love for curves (two different things you see)! You missed that rant so I'll let you off

    Good clarification on the point though and I appreciate it

    Ax

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    JayGee [sign in to see picture]
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    AdnaW wrote:

    I like you ....even if I'm not sure what dander means

    Ax

    I like you too, you lovely Christmas leggy elf you

    Dander = small particles of hair of feathers, so "getting your dander up" is like getting so annoyed that fur and feathers fly! *bemoans modern education*

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    Alicia D'amore [sign in to see picture]
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    JayGee wrote:

    AdnaW wrote:

    I like you ....even if I'm not sure what dander means

    Ax

    I like you too, you lovely Christmas leggy elf you

    Dander = small particles of hair of feathers, so "getting your dander up" is like getting so annoyed that fur and feathers fly! *bemoans modern education*

    Ahhh...it sounds vaguely familiar....I'm not good with "phrases", didn't know anything about "brass monkeys" or the likes 'til I met the OH, my mum had speech therapy as a child (bullied for her yorkshire accent) and now doesn't use slang or anything like that (apart from the phrase "it's a bit black over Bill's mothers" for some odd reason ) and you learn things like that from your mum usually don't you haha.

    Ax

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    KittyPurry [sign in to see picture]
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    Ahh damn insecurities! God knows I have plenty of them but I have noticed that my partner doesn't really see most of the things that worry me, acne is the obvious one! He also tends to love and praise the oddities that used to bother me like having odd shaped legs, chubby cheeks and quite a big forehead!

    A fine example of the different ways my OH and I see things is:

    I've recently been feeling a bit flabby because I haven't been able to exercise properly for a few months). However, all my OH has really noticed is that my boobs have gotten bigger! What feels a bit too wobbly to me he really likes! I think having an appreciative partner gives me the confidence to just jump on and go for it!

    When I'm on top it doesn't really feel like I'm being watched as such, I tend to keep eye contact with my OH so it feels really intimate rather than showy or porny.

    I find leaning right forward when I'm on top really lovely too, feeling our chests pressed together is again very intimate and loving (plus you get some fantastic clit-pubic bone friction going on!)

    A couple of other tricks that I've used to boost flagging confidence on top are:

    - wearing fantastic underwear, I find corests and basques in particular very empowering and super flattering. Plus by getting dressed up you can sort of pretend to yourself that you have a fantasy vixen alter ego who is going to seduce her lover and get the sex she wants!

    - blindfolding my OH: when I've felt particularly coy in the past I've whipped out a blindfold and suddenly got a rush of "I'm the boss now" ... tis a good way of getting used to going on top without feeling as self conscious because you can't be seen (an added bonus is that it seems kinky rather than shy!)

    I'd like to conclude my essay by saying that every single woman on this forum is downright gorgeous and I for one would be absolutely thrilled to be straddled by any one (or more!) of you, your partners are all very lucky indeed!

    xxKPxx

    PS My partner weighs nearly twice as much as I do and he doesn't squash me at all when he's on top of me, I just feel a very lovely sense of engulfment in his arms!

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    Columbus [sign in to see picture]
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    1260401230
    sexynurse09 [sign in to see picture]
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    Columbus wrote:

    Hey,

    Just as slight detour... do you mind me asking Magic Hands and Sexy Nurse, do you two enjoy BOTH using the forum? I think my partner was interested - or intrigued - but I felt like I want it as MY space you know. I don't say anything he's not aware of - in terms of how I feel - and I've reported back on some findings! I have said he should join if wants but he said 'no it's YOUR forum' (he's on a music one! lol). Do you two find it doesn't cause any issues? Or am I being too nosey?!!

    Hi Columbus,

    You're not being nosey at all! At first MH said it was my forum and wanted me to have it as my own space. But he was getting more and more intruiged so I encouraged him to join. I don't think it causes any issues between us, if anything its brought us closer because there's some things I feel too shy to discuss and if he reads it on here and he's interested he can bring it up with me then, but if not, nothing needs to be said.

    x

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    sexynurse09 [sign in to see picture]
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    Avrielle_Aniko wrote:

    This thread is being a bit scattered now...

    Back to the topic?

    Yep, sorry AA.

    So does anyone else have my problem when on top? After a few mins I can't feel him inside me anymore, and I don't know why

    x

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    KittyPurry [sign in to see picture]
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    sexynurse09 wrote:

    Avrielle_Aniko wrote:

    This thread is being a bit scattered now...

    Back to the topic?

    Yep, sorry AA.

    So does anyone else have my problem when on top? After a few mins I can't feel him inside me anymore, and I don't know why

    x

    I don't know why but a couple of guesses that come to mind are...

    - perhaps you're getting so wet you're loosing friction

    - you might be putting pressure on some nerves in the position you use and going a bit numb (like when ur bum went to sleep in assembly at school!)

    Is it the same in all on-top positions?

    xxKPxx

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    Columbus [sign in to see picture]
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    Thanks SN! I can't be any help re your query though x

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