• I've started this thread after good advice from Seduced ....

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    Malteser81 [sign in to see picture]
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    All that means babe is that it really IS possible to find someone that loves you for who u are, even for what u call your faults =) Xxx

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    xxxxchelzsxxxx [sign in to see picture]
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    In my first relationship i was mntally abused.. to the point i though i was going mad.... I self harmed and everything, lost all my friends and was completely alone... i Still have problems now, with myself believing my husband loves me and will stay with me.... It scares me sometimes.. but after reading what Malt said i now no it was him who made me that way... i guess i just have to fight whats still at the back of my mind!!

    LY your an amazing girl, with so much to give! I hope it all works out for you and you decide soon what your future will be *hugs* xxxxxxx

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    Lookin - Yummy [sign in to see picture]
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    xxxxchelzsxxxx wrote:

    In my first relationship i was mntally abused.. to the point i though i was going mad.... I self harmed and everything, lost all my friends and was completely alone... i Still have problems now, with myself believing my husband loves me and will stay with me.... It scares me sometimes.. but after reading what Malt said i now no it was him who made me that way... i guess i just have to fight whats still at the back of my mind!!

    LY your an amazing girl, with so much to give! I hope it all works out for you and you decide soon what your future will be *hugs* xxxxxxx

    I can completely understand that , been there myself.

    Aww hun, thanks for the reply. I do appriciate it .

    *Hugs* x

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    Malteser81 [sign in to see picture]
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    xxxxchelzsxxxx wrote:

    In my first relationship i was mntally abused.. to the point i though i was going mad.... I self harmed and everything, lost all my friends and was completely alone... i Still have problems now, with myself believing my husband loves me and will stay with me.... It scares me sometimes.. but after reading what Malt said i now no it was him who made me that way... i guess i just have to fight whats still at the back of my mind!!

    LY your an amazing girl, with so much to give! I hope it all works out for you and you decide soon what your future will be *hugs* xxxxxxx

    You know hun, my ex will NEVER even to this day admit that the things he said, did were wrong..... even though everyone who witnessed the way he treated me told him he was out of order. I had to have a termination as he wouldnt wear protection or be carefull (long story as to why), I asked him to come to the docs and he said he would look after our girls, even though the neighbour said she would have them. My first hosp appointment I went alone on the bus due to the same reason, when I started to loose it in work he told me to stay there in work or i'd loose my job and then when I went bk to hospital for the morning to make sure I was completly cleaned out and suffered terrible contractions, he wouldnt be with me as said he didnt like hospitals. U know I can giggle now or I have to, not sure which one tbh but he will say to me I was the one who told him not to go. It hurts and I wish I never had to see him but being the father of my kids Ido have to.

    Thing is mental abuse is soooo hard to prove and yet so easy to do. I love the forums as there are so many sories people tell of things they have been through that I dont feel alone and it makes me stronger and smile..... I love you all. Xxx

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    xxxxchelzsxxxx [sign in to see picture]
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    Malteser81 wrote:

    xxxxchelzsxxxx wrote:

    In my first relationship i was mntally abused.. to the point i though i was going mad.... I self harmed and everything, lost all my friends and was completely alone... i Still have problems now, with myself believing my husband loves me and will stay with me.... It scares me sometimes.. but after reading what Malt said i now no it was him who made me that way... i guess i just have to fight whats still at the back of my mind!!

    LY your an amazing girl, with so much to give! I hope it all works out for you and you decide soon what your future will be *hugs* xxxxxxx

    You know hun, my ex will NEVER even to this day admit that the things he said, did were wrong..... even though everyone who witnessed the way he treated me told him he was out of order. I had to have a termination as he wouldnt wear protection or be carefull (long story as to why), I asked him to come to the docs and he said he would look after our girls, even though the neighbour said she would have them. My first hosp appointment I went alone on the bus due to the same reason, when I started to loose it in work he told me to stay there in work or i'd loose my job and then when I went bk to hospital for the morning to make sure I was completly cleaned out and suffered terrible contractions, he wouldnt be with me as said he didnt like hospitals. U know I can giggle now or I have to, not sure which one tbh but he will say to me I was the one who told him not to go. It hurts and I wish I never had to see him but being the father of my kids Ido have to.

    Thing is mental abuse is soooo hard to prove and yet so easy to do. I love the forums as there are so many sories people tell of things they have been through that I dont feel alone and it makes me stronger and smile..... I love you all. Xxx

    Made me cry........ I went through something similar... Mine wont admit it either... took me ages to get people to see when i finally found the strength to do so!! I thought that was it for me... That he was all i could ever have... It really scares me to think i may have died if i had stayed with him.. i considered so many times ending it all!! its scary to think someone can have such a hold on you... and still now in the back of my mind i can hear his voice telling me im not good enough... i have no worth... but he will never admit to the suffering he caused me... Its vile to think of it... i am learning to block these out as my husband is really amazing... but i think my constant 'your going to leave me' is due to him and i feel awful when i ask my husband, who i no loves me so much... I love you all so much... xxxxxxxxxxx

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    Malteser81 [sign in to see picture]
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    xxxxchelzsxxxx wrote:

    Made me cry........ I went through something similar... Mine wont admit it either... took me ages to get people to see when i finally found the strength to do so!! I thought that was it for me... That he was all i could ever have... It really scares me to think i may have died if i had stayed with him.. i considered so many times ending it all!! its scary to think someone can have such a hold on you... and still now in the back of my mind i can hear his voice telling me im not good enough... i have no worth... but he will never admit to the suffering he caused me... Its vile to think of it... i am learning to block these out as my husband is really amazing... but i think my constant 'your going to leave me' is due to him and i feel awful when i ask my husband, who i no loves me so much... I love you all so much... xxxxxxxxxxx

    U know everything u have said I felt too, its really hard to understand how can someone be wrong when they love you so much isnt it =S. Luckily my mind never told me to self harm though the amount of times I sat three and though why not...... I think to much =S.

    Unfortunatly, or at least I believe is the case for me, I will always doubt myself. The good thing is having someone there to tell you your wrong and are infact wonderful which chelzs and LY... you are <3

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    xxxxchelzsxxxx [sign in to see picture]
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    Thankyou so much Malt!! I found out something new about myself... and i now no to stop blaming myself for everything.... I no it will never fully go away, its something we will have to live i guess chick... but maybe we can stop listening to it so much thankyou x

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    Malteser81 [sign in to see picture]
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    xxxxchelzsxxxx wrote:

    Thankyou so much Malt!! I found out something new about myself... and i now no to stop blaming myself for everything.... I no it will never fully go away, its something we will have to live i guess chick... but maybe we can stop listening to it so much thankyou x

    I hope one day I will hun though my most frequently used word is "sorry" lol =)

    Xxx

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    Lookin - Yummy [sign in to see picture]
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    Aww lovelies,

    Malt I can sympathise 100% with what you said. I had a M/C at 11 weeks due to abuse and I suffered that alone. He wouldn't allow my family near me, convincing them he was looking after me. Of course I went along with it , I was too scared to say otherwise.

    Those kind of guys are very clever at what they do ; they make us depend on them. It's been 3 years since I left my ex and I will admit I am not fully over it now. But I can see what I couldn't at the time. For example, when shopping the cahshier would ask "Do you want a bag?" He would say "No, I've got one here." Everyone kept tellin me that was wrong, I thought it was just a joke.....

    However we are all free from those "Beasts" now. Onwards and upwards xxxxx

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