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  1. episiotomy

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    Vampyrewillow [sign in to see picture]
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    Hi all,

    first of all feel free to shut this thread down if its not appropriate for the forums,

    i know alot of you are mums and for my course i'm doing a little bit of research on birth etc and i stumbled across episiotomies and i was wondering if anyone had ever one? alot of the things i have read seem to say they are horrible and have horrible effects on your sex life and some women have needed reconstructive surgery after having them.

    i don't need to write about this for my task or anything but it was something i stumbled on and was interested to know anybodies opinions because the things i was reading didn't say much about the after effects of such a procedure so i wanted to know if anyone has had something effect their sex life long term or their general life, because from the things i have read i don't think it is something that should be practised anymore! (obviously i am just a lowly childcare student not a doctor haha)

    VW x

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    Alicia D'amore [sign in to see picture]
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    The way I understand it - episiotomies are done when the skin is likely to tear anyway, it's making sure the tear happens in a controlled way rather than just shattering (which can happen and is terrifying) and they are pretty common and not all of them will end in disaster otherwise it'd be bigger news. I can absolutely see why they would be necessary in many cases.

    Whether I would happily have one or not is a different matter - I am fairly heavily set on caesarian due to personal circumstances so it's unlikely to be something I experience.

    Adx

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    Vampyrewillow [sign in to see picture]
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    Alicia D'amore wrote:

    The way I understand it - episiotomies are done when the skin is likely to tear anyway, it's making sure the tear happens in a controlled way rather than just shattering (which can happen and is terrifying) and they are pretty common and not all of them will end in disaster otherwise it'd be bigger news. I can absolutely see why they would be necessary in many cases.

    Whether I would happily have one or not is a different matter - I am fairly heavily set on caesarian due to personal circumstances so it's unlikely to be something I experience.

    Adx

    i have read a few accounts from mothers who say they are given them without their consent and even when tears aren't neccessary, i understand that sometimes they may be needed but alot of mums have said a tear is easier to recover from than the episiotomy, this is why i wanted to discuss it here though as these are comments and things left ages ago, no chance of me engaging in a discussion so now way to get alot of sides!

    VW x

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    WandA [sign in to see picture]
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    I'd never heard of the actual name for it until the you posted and wiki enlightened me:

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Episiotomy

    I know my mum had it, obviously hated it and remembers something about the nurse mentioning blunt scissors.... Doesn't sound at all nice!

    I honestly don't know enough about it to comment, my instinct is to agree it shouldn't be practised but I don't know if it's don't to prevent shattering or 'uncontrolled' tearing and is sometimes for the best or a medical antique left over from when childbirth was more barbaric.

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    Malteser81 [sign in to see picture]
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    As you've said VW tearing is much easier to heal but sometimes the skin can be too tight and needs to be cut or the baby will just not be able to come out. Its a hard decision to make as the longer a birth takes, the more painfull but then again the thought of being cut or tearing is horrifying to think of.

    One thing I know is that whilst you are giving birth most women are happy for anything to be done to make it end sooner and as soon as your baby is born any pain is forgotten. X

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    Vampyrewillow [sign in to see picture]
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    i hadn't until i started my research tonight!

    thanks for posting the link i actually meant to do that haha.

    my friends mum had it and forceps and found it horrific!

    i'm the same, instinct says no way but obviously there are situatins when it is needed, from the things i have read it seems midwives are bullying women into them,. admittedly the main of my research has been from america and things, i can;'t wait to get back to college 2 weeks today and ask my tutor!

    VW x

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    BashfulBabe [sign in to see picture]
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    I actually was meant to have one, as I was about to tear, but the baby decided she wanted out right now and they never got the chance: ended up with a third degree tear and a mess of stitches. They did ask for my consent before moving to do it, but by that stage I was so exausted I would have agreed to just about anything, so don't know if that can really count. The tear, even though pretty bad, actually caused me no problems: a bit of itching as it healed, and the embarassment of having a midwife constantly visiting to check the stitches "just in case", but it was all fine. Can't compare it to what would have been, but I know when there's a tear to that degree it can often cause some serious problems, including rupturing the wall between the vagina and rectum, so I was just very lucky it happened to tear in the right direction.

    I think the idea is to take that luck factor out of the equation: if they can guarantee an easily healed wound in a safe place, it's better than risking the tear going the wrong way and causing serious issues. I haven't heard of anyone having any negative effects because of it, but obviously it's not the kind of thing many women would feel comfortable posting on their Facebook page.

    There was a different procedure that used to be quite common in some places that was meant to have a similar reason, but it involved actually cutting into the pelvis - can't recall the name for the life of me - and many women who had it done were left incontenant or even unable to walk. It was fairly common in Ireland, especially with young single mothers who didn't have a man there to speak out for them at the time, and there was an element of "it'll stop the sluts getting knocked up again" to it. Only comes to mind because it was about a year ago that these women started speaking out against it, although the practice is pretty much done away with. Only mention it because there could be a possibility that it was lumped in as the same idea - both were cuts made to prevent tearing - and with the horror stories that came from that, there's a chance that some of the bad effects you've heard of could be in fact this other, more horrific version.

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    WandA [sign in to see picture]
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    Vampyrewillow wrote:

    i hadn't until i started my research tonight!

    thanks for posting the link i actually meant to do that haha.

    my friends mum had it and forceps and found it horrific!

    i'm the same, instinct says no way but obviously there are situatins when it is needed, from the things i have read it seems midwives are bullying women into them,. admittedly the main of my research has been from america and things, i can;'t wait to get back to college 2 weeks today and ask my tutor!

    VW x

    To be honest it wouldn't surprise me it's a problem in America, I imagine Britain shows a bit more discretion with such matters.

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    kittycatgirl [sign in to see picture]
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    I had my daughters in 2004 & 2007 the hospital I had them at said they didn't do episiotomys because they find it heals better to tear 'naturally', I tore with both births, quite badly with the first, and found that within 6 weeks that I had pretty much healed and have had no complaints from Hubby, although I do think there is scar tissue internally,but not really having spent much time examining that area not too sure, it's just a bit of bumpy like a small lump on the skin. Any ladies worried about this effecting their sex lives, shouldn't - yes it's tiring and that doesn't help, but as long as your man understands that it has taken 9 months to grow this baby and therefore will take as long if not longer to recover physically, so they will just have to lump it. Oh and some lovely gifts from Love Honey help.

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    shellyboo [sign in to see picture]
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    I have no experience with this at all, but just from a logic point of view, I'd rather be cut than tear. Given that a cut will be in a specific place designed to cause the least damage and a tear could be ANYWHERE, including into your rectum etc. Heard a few horror stories like that from my best mate, she's a doctor.

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    Alicia D'amore [sign in to see picture]
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    shellyboo wrote:

    I have no experience with this at all, but just from a logic point of view, I'd rather be cut than tear. Given that a cut will be in a specific place designed to cause the least damage and a tear could be ANYWHERE, including into your rectum etc. Heard a few horror stories like that from my best mate, she's a doctor.

    This is what terrifies me - shattering and uncontrolled tearing could lead to the greater issues! I think I'd probably prefer to be cut too.

    Although for me, I'm so adament that labour will mess me up completely physically (I tear just from cock, actually I tear just from walking so imagine what a baby will do to me) that I'm pretty certain caesarian is my best option.

    I'd rather have a huge massive cut that heals, than potential shattering that takes years (or never goes back to normal).

    Adx

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    WandA [sign in to see picture]
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    'Shattering' makes me feel ill. Even just the mention of it makes me feel ick.

    *Shudder*

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    Vampyrewillow [sign in to see picture]
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    I've heard people saying that the episiotomy rips muscle and tissue etc when minor tears only rip skin, i think maybe this is a bigger problem in america than here,

    i will have to speak to my tutor in two weeks and ask her what it is like over here,

    i was reading about some women were the midwives will cut them before there is even any complications, just as procedure! thats frightening!

    VW x

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    Despina Rose [sign in to see picture]
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    I wasnt a big fan of the idea of kids but my god this has so put me off. That and the fact that they cost on average 100,000!

    Rips and tears and cuts... *shudders*

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    Vampyrewillow [sign in to see picture]
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    MasqueradeMinx wrote:

    I wasnt a big fan of the idea of kids but my god this has so put me off. That and the fact that they cost on average 100,000!

    Rips and tears and cuts... *shudders*

    i'm with you there!

    VW x

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    Despina Rose [sign in to see picture]
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    Vampyrewillow wrote:

    MasqueradeMinx wrote:

    I wasnt a big fan of the idea of kids but my god this has so put me off. That and the fact that they cost on average 100,000!

    Rips and tears and cuts... *shudders*

    i'm with you there!

    VW x

    Glad I'm not the only one!

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    Vampyrewillow [sign in to see picture]
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    I'm so glad i have no maternal instincts!

    VW

    (btw if anyone is sat there thinking hang on she wants to work with kids, i do love kids to pieces but being a mother is not for me)

    VW x

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    Despina Rose [sign in to see picture]
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    Vampyrewillow wrote:

    I'm so glad i have no maternal instincts!

    VW

    (btw if anyone is sat there thinking hang on she wants to work with kids, i do love kids to pieces but being a mother is not for me)

    VW x

    I totally agree, this is completely me. AS with you I love kids but I just dont want them myself.

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    shellyboo [sign in to see picture]
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    Vampyrewillow wrote:

    I've heard people saying that the episiotomy rips muscle and tissue etc when minor tears only rip skin, i think maybe this is a bigger problem in america than here,

    i will have to speak to my tutor in two weeks and ask her what it is like over here,

    i was reading about some women were the midwives will cut them before there is even any complications, just as procedure! thats frightening!

    VW x

    Yeah, but... how do you know if it'll be a minor tear? If a doctor told me "we can cut you as a precaution OR there's a chance of tearing, from minor to your vagina tearing into your rectum giving you fecal incontinence" I'd be handing them the scissors.

    I don't blindly trust doctors, but to me it's just logical to go for the predictable amount of damage over the possibilty of something totally heinous. But that's just me I suppose :)

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    Vampyrewillow [sign in to see picture]
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    shellyboo wrote:

    Vampyrewillow wrote:

    I've heard people saying that the episiotomy rips muscle and tissue etc when minor tears only rip skin, i think maybe this is a bigger problem in america than here,

    i will have to speak to my tutor in two weeks and ask her what it is like over here,

    i was reading about some women were the midwives will cut them before there is even any complications, just as procedure! thats frightening!

    VW x

    Yeah, but... how do you know if it'll be a minor tear? If a doctor told me "we can cut you as a precaution OR there's a chance of tearing, from minor to your vagina tearing into your rectum giving you fecal incontinence" I'd be handing them the scissors.

    I don't blindly trust doctors, but to me it's just logical to go for the predictable amount of damage over the possibilty of something totally heinous. But that's just me I suppose :)

    Haha good point, i think the way its handled isn't correct though, obviously i don;t know from first hand so this is just me basically saying hmm it should be a last resort rather than a precaution,

    i think i would rather go for a chance of a tear, than 100% chance of a cut if you know what i mean, but as i don't plan on children it doesn't matter, this is why i wanted opinion because obviously the boards and things i was reading only had the negative not the positive, nobody goes online to say how great something was so i figured get some perspective before i came to an opinion,

    i just realised i haven't even asked my mother her thoughts yet, duh!

    *toddles downstairs to ask the most obvious person*

    VW x

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