• Your job vs. your sex life - When should it matter?

    1283945719
    WandA [sign in to see picture]
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    Avrielle_Aniko wrote:

    My OHs mother works as a primary school teacher. She doesn't really know much about the internet, but she can use it for research for school topics and marking etc. Recently the school asked her to download something from a disc on to her personal computer. She was concerned so brought it over for us to have a look at and it was a tracker that showed everything she had looked at online! But if she didn't use it and bring the disc back every week to be checked, then she was looking at disipninary action..

    It's a scary world..

    That might be because it's a work provided PC which I guess is then OK, use your own for personal stuff. It should be made perfectly clear though... That's dodgy.

    If not then the simple answer is: "I don't have a computer, I lend one off a family member". Sorted

    1283946375
    BashfulBabe [sign in to see picture]
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    Most of the time, they'd be hard pushed to actually fire you for a FB status or something they found while trawling for porn themselves, but many places will then find another way out of it. It came up when they were discussing publishing our full real names automatically with our posts on the World of Warcraft forum (an idea that has since been abandoned *phew*). People doing the hiring will more often than not now do a quick Google on your name, just to see what comes up. Nine times out of ten, you'll get a few pages of irrelevant waffle (mine is all about some random US graphic designer), or maybe a hit from FB or Twitter or some such. But chances are, with the popularity of things like the WoW official boards, they'd get to page one no bother, and then all they'll see is you wasting all your time on a silly computer game (another bias, all gamers are losers and addicts who will waste company time playing or posting and not come in because they pull a sicky to play and so forth). They obviously can't refuse you the position just because of that, but since the majority of times they don't have to give a reason, or if they do, they can easily make something up (not enough experience/over-qualified/better applicants, etc.), so they don't have to say "it's because Google showed me you're a gamer". Same goes for sex, if they Google you and find you posting on a sex-related forum like this one, they'll not say "you like sex toys so I won't employ you", but many will be more inclined to find a reason to turn you down.

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    tronic [sign in to see picture]
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    For me, if what one does is legal and not in conflict with the interests of your company as specified in the contract of employment it should not make any difference.

    I appreciate this is not really how things are, there's lots of prejudice out there and I don't agree with it!

    As for not liking the dress code of serving staff or whatnot, to my mind that is your choice as a patron and you can choose not to use that service or encounter those employees again. It is the choice and responsibility of the business to enforce whatever measures are fair ad necessary for their staff to convey the proper level of decorum to the customers. Unless we are their business consultants it's not up to us to decide their best practise, we can only refuse to use their company any more.

    For the gnarlier issue of things like working with kids etc. It strikes me that the only difficulty is caused by the relatively easy access to information on the internet etc. which might give more info than desired about the person in question. It really shouldn't matter if someone likes spanking, and also is a great primary school teacher. I am of course assuming that the national curriculum is what is being taught, and not how to spank each other, and the professionalism of the teacher would be the issue, and likely as not a non-issue, as their private life is completely separate and they probably like it that way.

    Maybe the fact that proper perverts, real offenders, slip through the assessment processes and wriggle their way into positions to take advantage of minors or vulnerable people is the problem which needs addressing?

    1283948632
    tronic [sign in to see picture]
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    Having said that I should hold my hands up at being a dick one time some years ago when it was discovered that somebody at work was into quite heavy restraints. I found it amusing as the guy was so not the stereotype and was really open about it, but I could have been more understanding about it. I certainly didn't give two hoots about it with regard to his job performance though, he was a top chap (no pun intended) and it was merely chucklesome in anecdotal terms, like.

    1283955482
    WandA [sign in to see picture]
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    Avrielle_Aniko wrote:

    That just had me curious what comes up when I type my name in google. Obviously another person with my name on Bebo and seems a lot of Germans love her... Hmmmm.. Can I copyright my name?

    I have a fairly uncommon 1st and 2nd name and some bastard has now stolen my internet name print! At least I can blame any dodginess on a car lovin' Ozzie...

    1283960596
    CurlyCoupleWife [sign in to see picture]
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    There are a couple with my name, one died in America in 1910 (the first few things on Google are a burial plot number & last will & testament)

    1283966483
    Vampyrewillow [sign in to see picture]
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    i am a student training on a level 3 course to end up becoming a nursery nurse/teaching assistant and i certainly wouldn't have my photograph up as i am in placements and i imagine parents might find it uncomfortable to know what their childs student nursery nurse likes in the bedroom, same with when i qualify, i am not bothered about keeping my face hidden as i don't particulary want anyone to know who i am but if it turned out you were one of my childrens parents i would feel uncomfortable knowing as much about your sex lives and also knowing that you know about me!

    it would be very awkward in my opinion so i would not put pictures on

    however if i was working in tesco or an office then no problem but you are entrusting me with your children and i don't want you to be sat there thinking my childs teacher wants to have sex outside or something

    i think we have to face facts that we dont want to know about our childrens teachers sex lives and i'm sure they dont want you to know either

    VW x

    1283966630

    [suspended user]

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    then they shouldn't be looking on here then ha ha xx

    1283968135
    Pinkilious [sign in to see picture]
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    Also a lot of professions especially those working with children are professional roles and it could bring a bad name to the workplace which i find ridiculous as there are not many people that don't like sex.

    But to be fair if i had a child and i knew there teacher was on here i would feel weird reading about their thoughts and fantasies which would put them in a very unprofessional light. Also how arkward would it be for a teacher if a pupil started quoting stuff off of the forum at them during lessons.

    1283969100
    Ecksvie [sign in to see picture]
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    WandA wrote:

    Avrielle_Aniko wrote:

    My OHs mother works as a primary school teacher. She doesn't really know much about the internet, but she can use it for research for school topics and marking etc. Recently the school asked her to download something from a disc on to her personal computer. She was concerned so brought it over for us to have a look at and it was a tracker that showed everything she had looked at online! But if she didn't use it and bring the disc back every week to be checked, then she was looking at disipninary action..

    It's a scary world..

    That might be because it's a work provided PC which I guess is then OK, use your own for personal stuff. It should be made perfectly clear though... That's dodgy.

    If not then the simple answer is: "I don't have a computer, I lend one off a family member". Sorted

    Is it a work PC though? If not, I say it's a serious breach of privacy. There's no way they could do it without your permission, so illegal.

    1283969165
    WandA [sign in to see picture]
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    Perhaps a point that has been overlooked is that if you are in a position in which some people may take objection to your personal life and you do post identifiable material then it perhaps demonstrates some other traits that you might not value.

    If we use a teacher as an example, although I'd have no issues with my child's teacher's private life, I would have misgivings if that teacher was silly enough to post such info. It hardly says "I'm intelligent enough to be teaching the next generation". Perhaps that is too harsh but I think if someone cannot/will not comprehend that discretion is advised it's not a great sign.

    1283969554
    WandA [sign in to see picture]
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    Ecksvie wrote:

    WandA wrote:

    Avrielle_Aniko wrote:

    My OHs mother works as a primary school teacher. She doesn't really know much about the internet, but she can use it for research for school topics and marking etc. Recently the school asked her to download something from a disc on to her personal computer. She was concerned so brought it over for us to have a look at and it was a tracker that showed everything she had looked at online! But if she didn't use it and bring the disc back every week to be checked, then she was looking at disipninary action..

    It's a scary world..

    That might be because it's a work provided PC which I guess is then OK, use your own for personal stuff. It should be made perfectly clear though... That's dodgy.

    If not then the simple answer is: "I don't have a computer, I lend one off a family member". Sorted

    Is it a work PC though? If not, I say it's a serious breach of privacy. There's no way they could do it without your permission, so illegal.

    From what I know about teachers they get free or really reduced computer equipment, it's pretty vital in modern teaching. If it is a work PC then I don't have any issues with them 'spying'.

    What would annoy me would be the double standard... I'm sure 'Hardcore Kinky Sluts 8' would receive more attention than a quick browse on Ebay, even if both were in personal time. However as a work PC then that is something you have to be aware of if those are the T&Cs of a free comp.

    1283969919
    Ecksvie [sign in to see picture]
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    I dont really get why it would bother them what you use it for though, as long as you're using it for the purpose it was intended for as well. While I can understand how the papers might scream about teachers using state funded computers to look at porn, once they've paid out, does it really matter? Presumably it would be the teacher's own personal electricity running it, thus not costing the state anything.

    So if you have one of these PCs, are you supposed to buy another PC for your own personal use? I say not bother, screw the free PC and just use my own.

    1283970297

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    . Oi Oi how would anybody know about your preferences unless you told them .So unless you done something outrageous and that it was" all around town"or in the press i can't really see your problem(paranoid or what?)but if it wasn't so bad that it wouldn't possibly effect anybody in question why the question on whether he/she is safe to work with even comes up..just small minded people i suppose

    1283970599
    WandA [sign in to see picture]
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    Ecksvie wrote:

    I dont really get why it would bother them what you use it for though, as long as you're using it for the purpose it was intended for as well. While I can understand how the papers might scream about teachers using state funded computers to look at porn, once they've paid out, does it really matter? Presumably it would be the teacher's own personal electricity running it, thus not costing the state anything.

    So if you have one of these PCs, are you supposed to buy another PC for your own personal use? I say not bother, screw the free PC and just use my own.

    Well... Porn sites do have a higher security threat I imagine. The school I was at had a virus problem, I spent a whole day running round scanning USB pens, explaining how to install the antivirus I downloaded on to them, turning networks off, scanning systems etc... It cost them less than geting a professional! I guess if you run a network you want to limit external factors that can screw things up. I think it's sensible to keep a work and personal PC/laptop (if only for your own security). I can understand why people get funny about mis use.

    1283970623
    CurlyCpl [sign in to see picture]
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    Although I have a laptop supplied by work I'd never consider it for personal use - I have my own box for that. The work one is there purely to allow remote access to corporate networks and the IT dept are understandably less than enthusiastic about users visiting potentially virus/trojan ridden sites (despite AV, locked down browsers etc). As such I fully expect my usage of works property to be monitored.

    In fact most corporate laptops are locked down tighter than a ducks arse with hard drive encryption and so on, and all internet access has to be done by going through the companies vpn.

    'Course if the blighters tried to monitor what I did on systems I own I'd be royally peeved and could feel lawsuits brewing!

    just my two penneth worth.

    1283970921
    CurlyCoupleWife [sign in to see picture]
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    Totally agree hubby.

    It's not your computer; it's something they've provided to enable you to work.

    1283971005
    Alicia D'amore [sign in to see picture]
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    The points I was going to make have already been mentioned I think!

    I agree with YesChef - there are cases when it does and should matter to employers - *they* have no right to discriminate against you, but their potential customers aren't legally bound. So they can turn down an opportunity to work with a group for any reason - even their employees sexual preferences. Once they sign a contract of course that is different. But I can see how it is important to an employer if their reputation is on the line.

    I think separating your work and personal life is important, I use different names for most of my online endevears (including non "kinky" things) except for facebook. I generally use a play on my first or first and middle names without my surname at all - the only exception being facebook. And I wouldn't ever agree to have an employer on my private facebook - I also would be wary about listing who my employer is on facebook for the points people have mentioned about representing your employer.

    I want freedom to discuss what ever I want rather than feeling I have to censor what I say - so I keep the two completely separate - and since I *have* to use my real name in my job, I'll use pseudonyms for personal stuff.

    Adx

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    Ecksvie [sign in to see picture]
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    lickmadick wrote:

    . Oi Oi how would anybody know about your preferences unless you told them .So unless you done something outrageous and that it was" all around town"or in the press i can't really see your problem(paranoid or what?)but if it wasn't so bad that it wouldn't possibly effect anybody in question why the question on whether he/she is safe to work with even comes up..just small minded people i suppose

    I heard a story about a teacher getting fired for being lesbian. Seriously!

    Admittedly, it did happen in America, but we're not even talking something outrageous here, just a simple life choice (if you even believe it is a choice!)

    1283971293
    WandA [sign in to see picture]
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    Ecksvie wrote:

    I heard a story about a teacher getting fired for being lesbian. Seriously!

    Admittedly, it did happen in America, but we're not even talking something outrageous here, just a simple life choice (if you even believe it is a choice!)

    Got to the bit in bold and thought: "America".

    Must not go ranty but I imagine it was another case of religious rights trumping all other types of rights, including personal. Strange how we still practically allow only sexual and religious discrimination, even stranger that there is often a legal framework to permit such discrimination.

    *Non rant fail*

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