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  1. Bisexual?

    1282595517
    dotdashdot [sign in to see picture]
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    I'm 19, female and have been in a relationship with a guy for four years. I watch girl on girl porn and masturbate to it, I write girl on girl erotica in my spare time, I find girls attractive, I regularly dream about being with girls and I've completely gone off sex with my boyfriend.

    I've never been with a girl before, so I don't really know if my feelings are serious. I'm not sure if I could feel the same love for a girl as I do for guys but I definitely feel sexually attracted to them. Does this mean I'm bisexual or bicurious or straight but confused?

    I'm very confused. Help!

    1282596292
    Malteser81 [sign in to see picture]
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    Well I consider myself bicurious. For me i'd love to taste and be with a woman yet I however and very much inlove with my male OH. Maybe i'll get to test my curiosity but I would like it to be with somone im comfortable with =)

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    WandA [sign in to see picture]
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    Your sexuality is what ever you think it is or choose to call yourself.

    many people here before have explained similar feelings, men for relationships but sexual attraction to men.

    What ever the case it doesn't actually matter.

    1282597451
    toxycat [sign in to see picture]
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    I would say bicurious.............your curious about the opposite sex yet in a 'straight' relationship. I went through pretty much a similar thing where i was very attracted to women, so much so that i tested my curiosity out......and yes i did enjoy it.....however i would never class myself as bisexual as i never had a desire to pursue a relationship with a female......i just found myself sexually attracted to them.

    I still do now and iv been married for 10 years.....think women are gorgeous!!!!............

    Your only 19 so you still have alot to discover and pursue regarding your sexuality............i wouldnt worry about it or stress over your feelings........and dont feel you have to label yourself because of what you like...........in time youll find out.........so please dont worry about it!!!

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    toxycat [sign in to see picture]
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    headsouth wrote:

    Does it mean you bi? I think it just means you're you.

    Needing to attach labels to yourself is unlikely to really clarify anything. Just enjoy your life and do what you want and what you are comfortable with as it presents itself and fits in with your own moral code.

    couldnt of said that better myself!!

    1282689750
    dotdashdot [sign in to see picture]
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    Thanks everyone, I think I'm probably bi-curious but I guess it really doesn't matter what I am. I'm just me... no need to add a label to that. I think it's something I'll have to properly experiment with in order to find out my true feelings but I wouldn't want to do it whilst in a relationship. Maybe someday!

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    Wizzie86 [sign in to see picture]
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    Hello! Sexuality can be very confusing and I think the best thing you can do for now is not to give yourself a label. Don't pressurise yourself into being in a category. With regards to your other half, is it definitely because you are thinking about girls or could you just be going through a dry patch? If you were thinking about other guys rather than girls would you see things differently?
    There are quite a few threads on bi-sexuality and curiousness that may be useful for you to read. People share their own personal experiences.  Apologies that I can't link them as I am on my phone. Type it into the search bar & I'm sure you will find some interesting reading. Relax and remember that curiosity is only natural xxx

    1282729703
    dotdashdot [sign in to see picture]
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    I wouldn't want a threesome with my boyfriend, I'm not against the idea of threesomes I just wouldn't want to do it with him 1. Because he hates the idea 2. because I'm a green eyed monster and don't think I could deal with him doing stuff to another woman and 3. Because he has no idea I find women that attractive.

    It could well be because of my confusion that we are going through a dry patch, combined with many other reasons such as stress, anxiety and possibly because of my contraceptive implant. All I know is that I'm not interested in his dick whatsoever! Possibly a bad sign...

    I think if I was thinking about other guys instead of other girls I would be able to still want sex with him, I would just pretend that I was having sex with other guys. Because it's girls I'm thinking about I can't act out what I'd want to do to them on him!

    I'm going to look up the other threads for some more advice and insight. Thank you!

    1282730997
    toycar69 [sign in to see picture]
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    dotdashdot wrote:

    It could well be because of my confusion that we are going through a dry patch, combined with many other reasons such as stress, anxiety and possibly because of my contraceptive implant. All I know is that I'm not interested in his dick whatsoever! Possibly a bad sign...

    Ouch, that sounds like a bit of a problem for your relationship with him. If you don't find him sexually attractive any more, it makes me wonder why you are still with him? Do you still love him?

    1282731378
    dotdashdot [sign in to see picture]
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    I've had a look through the threads and have decided that I need a lesbian experience before I can be sure what I am. My relationship seems dead end, we've had sex once in the past month and it was effing awful. I'm not attracted to him or his dick and I fantasise about women all the time. I think it's not going to last much longer.

    I don't know whether to tell him about my feelings or not. He's changed recently, since I started depriving him of sex he's much more desperate to make me happy and he's a lot more understanding. I told him I watched girl on girl porn the other day which he thought was interesting but I blushed and didn't want to talk about it anymore. I wouldn't want to tell him that I'm bicurious, I don't feel comfortable enough to.

    Anyway, IF we broke up how on earth would I go about finding someone to have an experience with? I would rather do it with someone I knew but I know that's not going to happen so it would have to be a stranger. I'd be really nervous about meeting someone of the net. Plus I know I'm going to be really fussy, I'd want someone pretty and slim who was semi inexperienced too so that I wouldn't feel like a complete prat if I did something wrong. I wouldn't want to do it with someone too experienced.

    How on earth do you find someone like this?!

    1282731395
    sexynurse09 [sign in to see picture]
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    Hello hun,

    I can identify with what you're saying. At 19 I was in my first serious relationship, we were engaged and I thought I liked men. It was during this time I met the most beautiful woman and developed a major crush on her. She has no idea to this day. I told my then boyfriend about it, as I believed communication to be very important and felt if he was going through the same thing i'd want him to be able to talk to me about it. He took it really well and actually loved the idea, for months. I later found out he thought I was joking. When he realised I wasn't joking and that I do like women aswell he wouldn't speak to me for ages.

    19 is a confusing age, like others have said, you're still very much getting to know yourself and what you like. Because he is all you have know sexually, and you are so young it is very natural to want to know what else is out there.

    I do feel if this carries on and you are certain its not a dry patch, you need to talk to your boyfriend, he deserves to know for the sake of his happiness and yours. Be who you are and don't feel pressured into giving yourself a label, you don't need one. All I know is if you're going to be happy in the long term, you need to be honest with yourself and him now.

    x

    1282731764
    Wizzie86 [sign in to see picture]
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    Well said SN. If you are going to try to meet someone on the Internet then please be very careful. People are not always who they appear to be x

    1282733198
    sexynurse09 [sign in to see picture]
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    dotdashdot wrote:

    I've had a look through the threads and have decided that I need a lesbian experience before I can be sure what I am. My relationship seems dead end, we've had sex once in the past month and it was effing awful. I'm not attracted to him or his dick and I fantasise about women all the time. I think it's not going to last much longer.

    I don't know whether to tell him about my feelings or not. He's changed recently, since I started depriving him of sex he's much more desperate to make me happy and he's a lot more understanding. I told him I watched girl on girl porn the other day which he thought was interesting but I blushed and didn't want to talk about it anymore. I wouldn't want to tell him that I'm bicurious, I don't feel comfortable enough to.

    Anyway, IF we broke up how on earth would I go about finding someone to have an experience with? I would rather do it with someone I knew but I know that's not going to happen so it would have to be a stranger. I'd be really nervous about meeting someone of the net. Plus I know I'm going to be really fussy, I'd want someone pretty and slim who was semi inexperienced too so that I wouldn't feel like a complete prat if I did something wrong. I wouldn't want to do it with someone too experienced.

    How on earth do you find someone like this?!

    Oops sorry hun we posted at the same time hadn't seen your last post.

    In all honesty I think you're making the right desicion. Its better to experiement now and find out what youo're like than to settle down with the wrong person only to find years later when you have kids etc...that you're not happy and don't know who you are.

    In my opinion, he deserves to know, but you have a right to keep it to yourself too hun. He is going to want to know why though. It doesn't sound like IF a break up is on the cards any more it sounds like WHEN from what you're saying.

    I wouldn't meet somebody off the net hun, you've really got to be careful. If you do decide to, make sure you take all safetly precautions (or come and meet me! ). I completely understand your feelings. I'm wanting to have a girl on girl experience and I know i'd be fussy too and terrified of making a complete tit of myself, not knowing what to do..etc. And it is very hard to meet someone once you take the internet away. You could try going to gay friendly pubs and clubs, see if you like the look of anyone there. Its hard to initiate flirting though with a girl! I've tried lol, I end up feeling sooo embarrassed.

    xx

    1282734213
    dotdashdot [sign in to see picture]
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    sexynurse09 wrote:

    dotdashdot wrote:

    I've had a look through the threads and have decided that I need a lesbian experience before I can be sure what I am. My relationship seems dead end, we've had sex once in the past month and it was effing awful. I'm not attracted to him or his dick and I fantasise about women all the time. I think it's not going to last much longer.

    I don't know whether to tell him about my feelings or not. He's changed recently, since I started depriving him of sex he's much more desperate to make me happy and he's a lot more understanding. I told him I watched girl on girl porn the other day which he thought was interesting but I blushed and didn't want to talk about it anymore. I wouldn't want to tell him that I'm bicurious, I don't feel comfortable enough to.

    Anyway, IF we broke up how on earth would I go about finding someone to have an experience with? I would rather do it with someone I knew but I know that's not going to happen so it would have to be a stranger. I'd be really nervous about meeting someone of the net. Plus I know I'm going to be really fussy, I'd want someone pretty and slim who was semi inexperienced too so that I wouldn't feel like a complete prat if I did something wrong. I wouldn't want to do it with someone too experienced.

    How on earth do you find someone like this?!

    Oops sorry hun we posted at the same time hadn't seen your last post.

    In all honesty I think you're making the right desicion. Its better to experiement now and find out what youo're like than to settle down with the wrong person only to find years later when you have kids etc...that you're not happy and don't know who you are.

    In my opinion, he deserves to know, but you have a right to keep it to yourself too hun. He is going to want to know why though. It doesn't sound like IF a break up is on the cards any more it sounds like WHEN from what you're saying.

    I wouldn't meet somebody off the net hun, you've really got to be careful. If you do decide to, make sure you take all safetly precautions (or come and meet me! ). I completely understand your feelings. I'm wanting to have a girl on girl experience and I know i'd be fussy too and terrified of making a complete tit of myself, not knowing what to do..etc. And it is very hard to meet someone once you take the internet away. You could try going to gay friendly pubs and clubs, see if you like the look of anyone there. Its hard to initiate flirting though with a girl! I've tried lol, I end up feeling sooo embarrassed.

    xx

    Don't tempt me!!!! :P

    Yeah I think it is more of a when we break up than an if but I just don't think it will do any good if I tell him, he's not very understanding about sexuality.

    I wouldn't want to meet someone off the net because you just don't know who you're talking to but I don't see any alternative. Go into a lesbian club and it's likely to be full of girls who are definite about their sexuality and know what they're doing. Plus I wouldn't know how to flirt with a girl, I don't even know how to flirt with a guy! x

    1282734719
    sexynurse09 [sign in to see picture]
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    Lol!

    Ok thats your decision hun, it's your business at the end of the day.

    If you meet somebody off the net PLEASE be careful. I'm not sayin it can't work because it can, I met my ex on the net and he wasn't a serial killer or anything. I completley understand your reasons for using the internet and if i'm honest i'd probably be doing the same in your situation. And its much easier to flirt when the person isn't actually in front of you so it might be better for you in that respect.

    If you want to talk feel free to add me on facebook just search for my email lisa_hunt_04@hotmail.com I'll help in any way I can, I've been where you are now xx

    1282736432
    dotdashdot [sign in to see picture]
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    To be honest I probably wouldn't do the online thing right away. I'd try my luck at finding someone first and then if I got nowhere then maybe I'd resort to it. But I know to be careful, I wouldn't do anything stupid.

    Argh this is so confusing, I wish I was lucky enough to have a friend who just happened to be curious and who wanted to have a go! It would be so much nicer to do it with someone I knew and trusted. My friends always said that if they had to have a lesbian experience then they would want to do it with me lol. I guess I'll just have to look around :) xx

    1282736686
    sexynurse09 [sign in to see picture]
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    Well that sounds promising hun! Would you be wanting a relationship with a woman or just sexual experiences? xx

    1282736892
    sexynurse09 [sign in to see picture]
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    In my view too AA! x

    1282739293
    KittyPurry [sign in to see picture]
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    sexynurse09 wrote:

    In my view too AA! x

    Agreed! I have all the deep emotional romantic relationship I will ever need with DD.

    I flirt a fair bit when I'm out and have kissed a few girls (and liked it!) but I'd love to find a girl I really like who could be a friend and playmate

    The curious friends thing does sound promising! I had a friend who I used to fool around with, she wasn't a lesbian she was just curious and liked orgasms! I advise getting out the Tequilla and playing truth or dare!

    xxKPxx

    1282742377
    dotdashdot [sign in to see picture]
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    No they're not curious, it was just in passing conversation if you HAD to have a lesbian experience with someone who would it be. They don't actually want to have one with me lol. I'd want a sexual thing first and then if I liked it I'd love to have someone who could be a great friend and a playmate too :) xx

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