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  1. Single or long-distance, which is worse?

    1277734080
    Doug [sign in to see picture]
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    Malteser81 wrote:

    Doug wrote:

    the worst thing about being single is the lonlyness

    I can be lonly though and i'm with an amazing guy. I think it depends on what you are like in yourself and what uve been though in your life. Part of me would love to spend ALL my time with my OH but i'd or we'd go out of our minds and everyone needs space and do do their own things. Missing your OH is a great thing =)

    but part of missing your OH is knowing that your going to meet them again, so your not truly away from them (if that makes sense, brain beign melted)

    1277734081
    Doug [sign in to see picture]
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    Malteser81 wrote:

    Doug wrote:

    the worst thing about being single is the lonlyness

    I can be lonly though and i'm with an amazing guy. I think it depends on what you are like in yourself and what uve been though in your life. Part of me would love to spend ALL my time with my OH but i'd or we'd go out of our minds and everyone needs space and do do their own things. Missing your OH is a great thing =)

    but part of missing your OH is knowing that your going to meet them again, so your not truly away from them (if that makes sense, brain beign melted)

    1277735058
    GHxx [sign in to see picture]
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    I agree with the loneliness, but I was in a long term relationship and felt lonely for a good part of that, now being single I have a fab group of friends and very rare am I lonely,

    I'm happy in my own company so single life suits me.

    xGHx

    1277735246
    X lovely lady X [sign in to see picture]
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    I totally agree with Hella how are you supposed to bond and learn about each other from such a distance. But i guess that depends on how frequently you are able to meet up, and how committed you both are to the relationship.

    If i really felt that the relationship was eventually going to go somewhere, and there were definately strong feelings between the both of us then i would really try to make a long distance relationship work. If one or both of those things were questionable then it would be much more worth while finding a great OH much closer to home where a strong relationship can really grow.

    1277735334
    Miss BoomStick [sign in to see picture]
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    I'm really not looking forward to august/september time. My Lovely fiance is going to a uni in wales and even though we planned to both move there it's been so hard to find somewhere to live so theres a 90/95% chance he'll be going without me. Hopefully he'll be able to find somewhere once he's there but Aberystwyth isn't a very big town lol

    1277735405
    Tigerlilies [sign in to see picture]
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    GHxx wrote:

    I agree with the loneliness, but I was in a long term relationship and felt lonely for a good part of that, now being single I have a fab group of friends and very rare am I lonely,

    I'm happy in my own company so single life suits me.

    xGHx

    I totally agree. I find that when I'm at university, the apparent lonliness of singledom doesn't register, because I'm having such fun with brilliant people.

    Once people are in that space, I think it's much easier to be assured that you're not getting into relationship for the sake of not being lonely.

    1277747882
    sweetlove666 [sign in to see picture]
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    i'd rather be LDR than single, as others have said you at least have an idea where the next shag is coming from!

    also there are ways to communicate much more easily ( even though it may not be as easy as seeing face to face)

    1277748172
    Doug [sign in to see picture]
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    sweetlove666 wrote:

    i'd rather be LDR than single, as others have said you at least have an idea where the next shag is coming from!

    also there are ways to communicate much more easily ( even though it may not be as easy as seeing face to face)

    would you still prefer a LDR if you knew your next shag was over a year away?

    1277748537
    sweetlove666 [sign in to see picture]
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    Doug wrote:

    sweetlove666 wrote:

    i'd rather be LDR than single, as others have said you at least have an idea where the next shag is coming from!

    also there are ways to communicate much more easily ( even though it may not be as easy as seeing face to face)

    would you still prefer a LDR if you knew your next shag was over a year away?

    yeah, as i still would know it was there.

    im up to 7 months now, and i dont know when my next shag is coming.

    plus its comforting to know someone cares about me and finds me attractive. and even things like hearing the partners voice is amasing at times

    1277749422
    Doug [sign in to see picture]
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    fair enough. it has been nearly 2 years for me, although we did agreee that it was ok for us to be with other people, although i haven't taken that up.

    1277749499
    KittyPurry [sign in to see picture]
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    For me I think it would depend on the relationship. I was never into the abstract idea of "being in a relationship with [insert partner here]." I was merrily tonking along on my own then just met the right person and fell in love and our relationship is wonderful. Faced with the choice of LDR with my current partner or being single now...I'd choose LDR with him everytime but because it's him and I'm already in love!

    xxKPxx

    1277749769
    Laurakins [sign in to see picture]
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    I much prefer LDR relationships to being single. But i guess that comes down to me and my fiancee. We both met online and stayed together for a good few years like this. We did have our difficulties, but we always stayed true to each other, but i think we both felt really strongly about each other to be able to do it. After a few years we both met and it was amazing, such a feeling of completion whenever we was together. It was hard travelling back and fourth to America and the UK but we made it work, and have done for about 5 years in total. Yeah the sex life isn't anything like when you are together, but we made it work for us. We tended to use webcam and mic's and of course imagination! As this was a permanent thing for me and my OH we both made sure we had our own privacy, and we kind of timed everything around each other. We are now working on applying for fiancee's visa as we cant stand being apart, but this will be big hurdle! I think for LDR's to work you have to feel very strongly about that person to make it work. Your situation is a little closer than mine, so I'm sure if you really are wanting it to work then you can. If its just a case of sex then personally i would have said single, especially if your not really committed to this girl miles away, as it would mean probably turning down a few ladies when your out with the lads ;)

    I think its more up to you and what your relationship is like with the lady in question! Good luck

    LK xxx

    1278007413
    Alicia D'amore [sign in to see picture]
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    I haven't been single since I was 15 so I can't really comment - if I got horny before 15 it's not like I'd ever had any sex to know what I was missing :P

    But LDRs are incredibly tough. I had it easier because we were *always* long distance but in relationships where you used to see each other often then have to switch to once a month - I think I'd rather be single, at least if you really need to you can try and find someone to occupy your body and mind and you don't feel like you're "waiting".

    Ax

    1278007496
    Alicia D'amore [sign in to see picture]
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    Of course I obviously thought LDR's were worth 3 years of effort, but I guess I mean, in terms of toughness - I would prefer to be single. But with the right person, it's worth it and I wouldn't change my LDR for the world...confusing answer!

    Ax

    1278010745
    CurlyCoupleWife [sign in to see picture]
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    Nexas wrote:

    The thing is, it's not about the sex thing either... for me it's about knowing that someone's there and cares that deeply about you...

    absolutely!

    1278022037
    Alicia D'amore [sign in to see picture]
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    I answered with regards to sex seeings how that was the question.

    I wouldn't pick just any LDR over being single since not everyone is worth the hassle, but with WandA it was totally worth it. In terms of the relationship as a whole it was totally worth it. In terms of horniness it was worth it too, but it's more difficult than I imagine being single to be. Totally worth the wait though!!

    Ax

    1285427430
    Miss BoomStick [sign in to see picture]
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    Miss BoomStick wrote:

    I'm really not looking forward to august/september time. My Lovely fiance is going to a uni in wales and even though we planned to both move there it's been so hard to find somewhere to live so theres a 90/95% chance he'll be going without me. Hopefully he'll be able to find somewhere once he's there but Aberystwyth isn't a very big town lol

    He left yesterday for uni and I'm already missing him like mad. Not sure how this long distance thing is going to work, I'm already getting annoyed at him not being here and he's only been gone 33hours

    1285427840
    xxxxchelzsxxxx [sign in to see picture]
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    Id say long distance as missing someone tends to hurt alot more than being single, well depending on who you are... But i hate that feeling of missing someone you love x

    1285427923
    WandA [sign in to see picture]
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    Miss BoomStick wrote:

    Miss BoomStick wrote:

    I'm really not looking forward to august/september time. My Lovely fiance is going to a uni in wales and even though we planned to both move there it's been so hard to find somewhere to live so theres a 90/95% chance he'll be going without me. Hopefully he'll be able to find somewhere once he's there but Aberystwyth isn't a very big town lol

    He left yesterday for uni and I'm already missing him like mad. Not sure how this long distance thing is going to work, I'm already getting annoyed at him not being here and he's only been gone 33hours

    Although we started long distance so it was perhaps a bit easier than always seeing each other I think one positive to take from it is that it can make your communication excellent!

    I hope all goes well.

    1285428105
    Despina Rose [sign in to see picture]
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    Long distance. If you are single, you dont miss the person, you can have toys and extra fun. You dont miss a person. Its privation vs deprivation. Privation is never having something or someone so you can miss it. Or deprivation meaning you had something or someone and then you dont.

    My mum and her OH have been in a long distance (Norfolk and Callifornia) and they hate it, they dont see each other for much more than 2 months a year. The last time she was there was january and the next will be november!

    I couldnt do long distance, so privation rather than deprivation.

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