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  1. Orgasm Army help needed....

    1277487321
    GHxx [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
    • Posts: 242
    • Joined: 20 Aug 2008

    Right, you're all fantastic at advice and I dont normally need to ask but this situation I've been changing my mind every few minutes it's driving me insane!!!

    I've been sleeping with my fuck buddy for 2 years, and the sex is incredible, he's a nice guy and it works.

    I dont want anything more from him but recently (we work together) my manager asked me if I was sleeping with him, even though I said no and since then she's took it upon herself to tell everybody at work... i hate bitching and gossip!!! anyway cut a long story short, he's found out denied it and we carried on as usual.

    Until today my close friend at work, who is a mutual friend said he had told my friend not to mention me to his other friends as he was embarrassed he'd slept with me (2 years ago we did sleep together at a work do, people know about this but it never came to light that we carried on)

    I don't want my personal life known same as him but I feel hurt that he said i was an embarrassment,

    I've said i'm going round tonight as I'd arranged, but part of me thinks this should be the last time...

    as great as the sex is i shouldnt be made out to be an embarrassment to him.... dont wana lose out on great sex but he's knocked my confidence big time, so i'm stuck!!

    any advice would be much appreciated.... (however I totally get you have more important things going on and will not take offence if you ignore this thread)

    Thanks in advance!!

    xGHx

    1277488146
    Ecksvie [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1173
    • Joined: 11 Jun 2009

    It's difficult to say without really being there. The thing is, having a fuck buddy isn't always a socially acceptable thing. I don't see why it isn't, but that's the way things are. It may be that he's embarrassed about the fact that he has a fuck buddy, rather than the fact that it's you. I know if I had a fuck buddy, it's unlikely I'd be shouting out about it to everyone, no matter who it was. I wouldn't want people to know. As much as I find it a good thing, other people see it as deviant and sometimes wrong.

    It sounds like you need to have a talk with him. Only then would I make a decision over that should happen.

    1277488404
    KittyPurry [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
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    • Joined: 22 Aug 2009

    Could it be that he's not actually embarassed you just about the situation in a general sense e.g. he's a bit shy or embarassed about people knowing that he has casual sex or sex with a colleage? Could it be simply that something got lost in translation? You're getting information 3rd hand so there's always room for things to get misinterpreted.

    You could maybe ask the mutual friend to find out what in particular is embarassing him. Having said that however I'd probably be more inclined to ask him directly. Explain the situation, tell him he's hurt you and if he's sympathetic and honest about his reasons for saying it (or if he genuinely has no idea where that's come from) you've got a good chance of working things out. If however he gets defensive or shifty I'd tell him to sling his hook then get yourself a bigger, better bedfellow! In my opinion it takes quite a pathetic individual to continue sleeping with someone they're ashamed of. Not wanting to broadcast it is one thing but embarassment is quite another: you deserve respect damnit!

    Whatever happens, don't let it knock your confidence my lovely

    xxKPxx

    1277488767
    Tigerlilies [sign in to see picture]
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    The minute that a lover involves a headache situation requiring more than one paragraph, it's time for an upgrade. Cut your losses and get a hottie outside of the work place. So much simpler.

    And your boss can kiss your ass.

    x

    1277494708
    X lovely lady X [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 50
    • Joined: 22 Jun 2010

    KittyPurry wrote:

    Could it be that he's not actually embarassed you just about the situation in a general sense e.g. he's a bit shy or embarassed about people knowing that he has casual sex or sex with a colleage? Could it be simply that something got lost in translation? You're getting information 3rd hand so there's always room for things to get misinterpreted.

    You could maybe ask the mutual friend to find out what in particular is embarassing him. Having said that however I'd probably be more inclined to ask him directly. Explain the situation, tell him he's hurt you and if he's sympathetic and honest about his reasons for saying it (or if he genuinely has no idea where that's come from) you've got a good chance of working things out. If however he gets defensive or shifty I'd tell him to sling his hook then get yourself a bigger, better bedfellow! In my opinion it takes quite a pathetic individual to continue sleeping with someone they're ashamed of. Not wanting to broadcast it is one thing but embarassment is quite another: you deserve respect damnit!

    Whatever happens, don't let it knock your confidence my lovely

    xxKPxx

    I really do agree with you KP! At first i thought confront him and make him feel bad just like he has done to you, but i think sitting down and being the bigger person by trying to sort it out is a much better idea. If it turns out what he has said is true then you can tell him you want nothing more to do with him. Your confidence should not be shaken your obviously a very desirable woman who deserves better! Go and get yourself a gorgeous man who will pamper to your every need!!

    1277494789
    Thin One [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major
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    • Joined: 13 Mar 2010

    I think it's none of your bosses business who you fuck so why they asked in the first place is a bloody cheek. I think if the situation is effecting you emotionally then you should give serious consideration to knocking on the head but it maybe worth clarifying with him as to exactly what he meant.

    1277497913
    GHxx [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
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    • Joined: 20 Aug 2008

    thanks all as usual!!

    I'm going round to see him tonight, I just refuse to be an embarrassment - i dont think its cos he's shy at all he's very much a charmer and granted i dont want my sex life broadcasting. My boss can defo kis my ass, I'm more angry about that than anything if i'm honest!! but losing the great convient sex I've got used to will be gutting!!

    I will keep you updated, i hate having my confidence knocked by a guy i refuse to let it happen again but i have to have it out with him... i strongly doubt i'll get a straight answer!!

    Thank you all!!

    xGHx

    1277535037
    SEXYGET 69 [sign in to see picture]
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    If someone said after two years of me allowing them access to my body that "I" was an embarrassment i'd absolutely fuck them right off GH. You are not an embarrassment. If I said that to my OH my feet wouldn't touch the floor girl. You can get another bloke, easy mate! That's my opinion anyway. Life's too short for putting up with shit like that. SG x

    1277539058
    GHxx [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
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    Thanks I've told him what I heard and how I felt and I didn't really get a response so exactly as you said SG i fucked him right off and left!

    Bit sad about it today but I've got 80kids to teach throughout the day to keep me entertained!!

    Thanks to all again! Think this girl will be having fun with her toys alone for quite a while!

    xGHx

    1277540091
    SEXYGET 69 [sign in to see picture]
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    Bloody good on you girl, you encountered crap in your life, you took control of the situation and made a decision to resolve it to your satisfaction, brilliant mate! I'm a bit ruthless myself due to past shit in my life. We've only got 80 odd years in this place and we don't need any self centered pricks to upset the ride girl. I'm made up for you GH! Best wishes always. SG x

    1277540449
    GHxx [sign in to see picture]
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    SPOT ON! thanks SG!

    let the fun times roll....

    xGHx

    1277541033
    Muz333 [sign in to see picture]
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    Ah, I was going to recommend doing exactly that when I got back from the pub last night. Glad to hear you made the logical decision.

    1277545896
    Ilovemyman [sign in to see picture]
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    SEXYGET 69 wrote:

    If someone said after two years of me allowing them access to my body that "I" was an embarrassment i'd absolutely fuck them right off GH. You are not an embarrassment. If I said that to my OH my feet wouldn't touch the floor girl. You can get another bloke, easy mate! That's my opinion anyway. Life's too short for putting up with shit like that. SG x

    I agree with SG two years is a long time! I'm glad you sorted it out! Hope you find the man you deserve, someone that respects you! x

    1277553812
    Lovehoney - Gems [sign in to see picture]
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    Hi GHxx,

    I totally agree with all the other comments, nobody should ever be allowed to make you feel so bad but sadly it does happen.

    I've not been on the forums for that long but I can see that everyone on here is lovely and you definately deserve more than this man.

    To try and brighten up your day a bit I've popped a few more Oh! Points into your account.

    Try and have a good weekend - remembering that you are a worth while human being and all your friends on here believe that too.

    :o)

    1277554927
    Ilovemyman [sign in to see picture]
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    Aah that's lovely Gemma! I hope you get something lovely to make you feel better GH! You deserve it xxxxx

    1277555963
    spguy30 [sign in to see picture]
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    GH the words Total Pr*k Spring to mind... i no kinda how you feel was put in a simalar posstion a few years back and it totally knocked my confidance and still have not regained it.. as i let and take things pvery personaly like that... But that being said im slowly coming round and i started by thinking positive as corny as it sounds, and trust me when i say this, He will be the embarrassed one when he relises your gorgoeus and he wants you as a partner and reliaes what a fool he's been ... x

    Ya sound like a top girl and you will find someone who will adore you for you babe xx

    1277568785
    GHxx [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
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    Gemma you're lovely thank you!

    It's been a bit of a shit day but the sun is shining and i'll have to get my toys out tomorrow and get a little of myself back!!

    xGHx

    1277569682
    Muz333 [sign in to see picture]
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    Ah, lucky you getting some free points. Hope it helps but by the sounds of things it's not like you had any feelings for the guy anyway so just put it behind you. :)

    1278008562
    Alicia D'amore [sign in to see picture]
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    Glad you got it all sorted GH! Well done :D

    Ax

    1278020063
    WandA [sign in to see picture]
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    I haven't read many of the other responses but I'd just remind you that what your manager is doing isn't very professional and I'm sure it breaches quite a few laws!

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