1. Post on behalf of my friend - opinions needed

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    lovelylumps [sign in to see picture]
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    My friend and her partner have an amazing sex life when it happens but he goes through stages of not even bothering with her. If she tries he just goes to sleep but then all of a sudden he pays interest in her sexually after x amount of days. They aren't having any issues together, not falling out etc he just blows hot and cold on the sexual side. What's your opinion

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    Ian Chimp [sign in to see picture]
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    Maybe his libido isn't as high as hers? They should probably have a chat about it.

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    MK7 [sign in to see picture]
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    I'm like this. It comes and goes in waves. Seems normal to me.

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    MsR [sign in to see picture]
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    It can all wax and wane over time in a long term relationship - sometimes over a few weeks, months or even years one partner can have a higher drive than the other. I think it is common. What makes or breaks a relationship is how each couple deals with it - certainly talking, being open, and deciding how both can find a way of being happy can only help.

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    Bigiain [sign in to see picture]
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    What's the issue? Maybe he just likes sleep...

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    Don’t it’s not all about Getting [sign in to see picture]
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    What age is your friends bloke, it is common for men to have in balance due to testosterone levels and at a certain age group it's more likely to factor, good news is it's not long term.

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    lovelylumps [sign in to see picture]
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    Don’t it’s not all about Getting wrote:

    What age is your friends bloke, it is common for men to have in balance due to testosterone levels and at a certain age group it's more likely to factor, good news is it's not long term.

    Late 30s
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    Don’t it’s not all about Getting [sign in to see picture]
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    After age 30, most men begin to experience a gradual decline in testosterone. A decrease in sex drive sometimes accompanies the drop in testosterone, leading many men to mistakenly believe that their loss of interest in sex is simply due to getting older.

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    Alicia4Ever [sign in to see picture]
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    Any decline in testosterone levels has no impact on the ability to perform; just the libido. Before anyone says that low testosterone level does impact male performance I should point out that as a pre-op trans woman taking oestrogen along with testosterone blockers, that I know first hand that it doesn't.  It's more usual for the desire for sex ( libido)  to come before arousal, but doesn't have to be that way. It is possible to learn to get the arousal going then the desire will usually follow. 

    He doesn't need to be feeling that mother nature is telling him it's time to be winding down; sex is mostly in the mind, consiquently that's where most of the problems lay.

    Maybe it's time for them to talk, so that any possible issues can be explored together. If he's just stressed from work, and wishes that he had more drive for it then they could try getting him to learn to get aroused first. If he was just not into sex any more I don't think he would blow hot and cold; for me it sounds like there is something behind this, be it hormonal, or otherwise. 

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    Don’t it’s not all about Getting [sign in to see picture]
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    Alicia4Ever wrote:

    Any decline in testosterone levels has no impact on the ability to perform; just the libido. Before anyone says that low testosterone level does impact male performance I should point out that as a pre-op trans woman taking oestrogen along with testosterone blockers, that I know first hand that it doesn't.  It's more usual for the desire for sex ( libido)  to come before arousal, but doesn't have to be that way. It is possible to learn to get the arousal going then the desire will usually follow. 

    He doesn't need to be feeling that mother nature is telling him it's time to be winding down; sex is mostly in the mind, consiquently that's where most of the problems lay.

    Maybe it's time for them to talk, so that any possible issues can be explored together. If he's just stressed from work, and wishes that he had more drive for it then they could try getting him to learn to get aroused first. If he was just not into sex any more I don't think he would blow hot and cold; for me it sounds like there is something behind this, be it hormonal, or otherwise. 

    Agree my post was only pointing to libido and stress for sure could also impact libido 

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