1. Removing piercings for partners

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    VanillaWithSprinkles [sign in to see picture]
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    So I have both nipples pierced, which comes as a shock to any man who sees them for the first time as I am very "girl next door", nerdy, "not that kind of girl" and I love this.

    I always hated my boobs because they are too big and I have quite large areolas, this all changed once I got my piercings, the jewellery is so gorgeous and it has given me so much more body confidence.

    However, my ex-boyfriend did admit to me that he didn't like them, doesn't like the feel of metal and thinks they get in the way/ruin the experience. I was wondering if this has ever been a problem or even a dealbreaker for anyone else- and if so would you remove them or think about ending the relationship?

    I don't think I could ever take mine out as they would close up almost immediately and the whole re-piercing and healing process would take the best part of a year- is that selfish?

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    NatandTom [sign in to see picture]
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    Your body, your choice. Not selfish in my opinion!

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    Guy14357 [sign in to see picture]
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    Hell no if you like them keep them. They sound beautiful.

    if your happy wth them that’s all that matters. I’d like it if my ex had them

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    VirginAngel [sign in to see picture]
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    I have my left nipple pierced, again to help with how i felt my breasts looked, my left is much smaller and i have congenital syymastia. My right was pierced but was botched by the piercer, not got round to the re pierce as i hate the pain.

    No, i would not take it out for a partner. I had it done for my emotional benefit and body confidence and self esteem. It's also not a secret i have it done, all my friends know and like you, i'm not the "type" they expected to have it done either. I'm open about the fact i have it and why, so anyne i was considering dating would know before we actually got to dating stage so they have the option before it even gets that far to decide ifthey can accept it or not. If not, no date.

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    K&c30's [sign in to see picture]
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    If they give you body confidence you shouldn't have to change fore anyone so my vote keep them in it's selfish for someone to ask you to change. I have absolutly no issue with the wife getting anything she wants pierced infact i think a little piercing here and there is beautiful.
    I had my nipple pierced but i took it out when it kept getting caught on tops being pulled on and off. I now have a two little lumps from the healing and it looks a little silly now.

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    VanillaWithSprinkles [sign in to see picture]
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    I am in complete agreement. On the surface taking them out seems like such a small concession for a good relationship but in reality the self-confidence and joy that having them in brings is actually worth more!

    I'd never ask a partner to change anything about themselves either, and do love a nipple piercing on a man too.

    Thank you guys for your comments this has been bothering me for a while and it's nice to know I'm not the only one who'd refuse to change.

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    wildflower [sign in to see picture]
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    No I don't think it's selfish to want to keep your piercings. I personally haven't got my nipples pierced but if I did I would expect the person I was in a relationship with to accept them as part of me especially if I already had them before we met.

    Of course you don't to go through the piercing process all over again and lots of men actually find nipple piercings a turn on so it may not be a problem for the next partner you have.

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    jodielawsonx [sign in to see picture]
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    I got mine done about 3 years ago for the same reasons as you , I love them but my bf off 15 years is not the biggest fan off them and would prefer me without , he dosn't make a fuss about it thanfully and I think he would secretly miss them if I did remove them.But... I would never take them out to suit him.

    You are not being selfish at all , you should not remove them for someone else and your confidence is so much better so why go back the way? I would defintly keep them hun , nipple piercing!!

    #TeamNipplePiercings

    xxx

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    VanillaWithSprinkles [sign in to see picture]
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    #TeamNipplePiercings for the win!

    Thinking about it there were even times where he'd get a bit rough with them and I used to get so paranoid that he was trying to take them out and hoping I didn't notice. So much wrong with that first relationship that I didn't spot until it was over... Would have had huge regret if I had taken them out for something that lasted all of 3 months. We live and learn!

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    Bigiain [sign in to see picture]
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    Absolutely not!

    I've had my tongue pierced since I was 18, and my ex got to a stage where she wanted me to take it out...glad I never cause she's now the ex and my current g/f likes it...as do I

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    Justthe2ofus2007 [sign in to see picture]
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    I had my right side pierced when I was 18, and I did it for me, I took it out myself after a bad relationship , silly really as he got what he wanted. I had it re pierced at 23 but sadly it didn’t heal properly and the piercer didn’t put it straight , it made me self conscious.
    I say it’s your body and your choice, if I had my turn again I would keep it .

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    Lovehoney - Jess Wilde [sign in to see picture]
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    I would never ever permanently remove a piercing for a partner. or anyone else, and the only reason I would temporarily remove one would be if it was causing them or me actual pain during sexytimes (or I had to for an operation for example). 

    To me this is equally as important as never getting a piercing for a partner, too. 

    The only person you should ever get or retire a piercing for is yourself.

    Three things you should focus on here are: 

    1) You got them pierced for you. Partners will come and go, but you will be around you forever. So do what makes you happy :) 

    2) It sounds like you have a lot more self-love with your piercings in. Don't ever do anything for anyone else which could lead you to loving yourself less. It's never worth it. 

    2) He's an EX and probably for good reason. Stop worrying about what he thinks. His opinions can stay where he is: the past. 

    Oh and as for it being a deal breaker: I would absolutely end a relationship with someone who said that my nipple piercings (or a different modification) was a deal breaker for them.

    Anyone who puts that much importance on my jewellery / body mods is not putting enough importance on my personality and soul, and that is the kind of person that I don't I want to get to know at all, let alone be in a relationship with. 

    What the heck has a piece of metal in my body got to do with what sort of spouse I make? Nowt. I've experienced this situation from both sides. Some guys I've been with try to get me to remove or hide my mods, where others are clearly with be because of my tattoos and piercings because they think it's "cool" or something. Both are absolutely infuriating and hurtful. 

    I want someone to be with me for ME and the guys who last are the ones who see through my physical attributes, natural or paid for, and love me for my personality. The physical attributes should be an "extra": and feel like either a 'cherry on top' or 'a minor thing they can look past'. 

    Hope that helps! 

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    Alicia4Ever [sign in to see picture]
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    Jess pretty much says it for me.

    One thing I did't notice about what your ex said, is that it was all about how he thought it ruined "his" experience. What would be next, your hair style, the size of your boobs, the shape of your labia; wtf as any of it got to do with his pleasure. It's all your body, and it's nothing to do with anyone else; as Jess said, anyone who wants to change you into something else for the sake of their own pleasure, doesn't deserve to be with you.

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    KinkyMinxMoo [sign in to see picture]
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    "Huzzah!!" to what Jess said, could not have put it better myself.

    At first I thought that this thread was going to be removing as in "I can't get the bar / ring out / off, can you help?" (I am not 100% awake yet) but I am glad that I popped on and see that the thread is what it is as this sort of thing is something that I feel very strongly about.

    It can sound selfish but I think that you have every right to be when it comes to your body; people can't pick and choose the genitals that their partner has so why should they be able to with other things. I get a sense of "controlling" with this sort of stuff (personal experiences) as it may as well be telling you what clothes that you can and can't wear and most people wouldn't accept that so why would you if it is to do with body mods?

    I have coloured hair, piercings and tattoos, all of which I have done for me, sometimes I'd ask a partners thoughts or opinions but I come with disclaimer that I'll do what I want to do with MY body and if that was a problem, that was a deal breaker.

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    VanillaWithSprinkles [sign in to see picture]
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    KinkyMinxMoo I have now read the thread title back and can't imagine it any other way than "helping someone remove it" now lol.

    You are all very right and make some good points. I also never thought about it in the second way Jess pointed out, that some guys can be with you for the piercing novelty factor- not for you as a person. Definitely worth keeping in mind for future dating.

    I bloomin' love this forum, everyone is so supportive and there is a lot of female empowerment which I can really get behind.

    Cheers again m'dears

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    KinkyMinxMoo [sign in to see picture]
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    Oops haha, I have just re-read my response and I really need to get my head on... "people can't pick and choose the genitals that their partner has", I hope you'll all understand that I meant shape / size / colour.

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    Peakcouple [sign in to see picture]
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    I (G) took my first Prince Albert out for a woman I was having a relationship with, wish I hadn't and I had it re-pierced when R and I got together. It would have been much easier just to take it out for sex, as I do now when swinging with someone who doesn't like it.

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    RosyCheek [sign in to see picture]
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    I have the rebellious gene. If someone told me to take out my piercing I would be straight down that studio to get an many as my nipples would take!

    Be yourself and be proud!

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    Lovehoney - Jess Wilde [sign in to see picture]
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    RosyCheek wrote:

    I have the rebellious gene. If someone told me to take out my piercing I would be straight down that studio to get an many as my nipples would take!

    Be yourself and be proud!

    😂 Also this! 

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    aeiou [sign in to see picture]
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    Nooo I wouldn't take them out, especially if they would heal over! I woudln't personally end the relationship but if that was a deal breaker for him them good riddance.

    It definitely isn't selfish. Body confidence shows in the bedroom, if you weren't as confident you probably wouldn't be as good!

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