1. Feeling quite emotional

    1525449423
    Bennyboy69 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
    • Posts: 686
    • Joined: 3 Mar 2018

    PinkVixen90 wrote:

    I'm so nervous about posting this as this is my very first post and I'm a very quiet person but I feel I need a bit of reassurance. I'm 27 and I'm a virgin (please don't laugh). I haven't even been kissed yet (again please don't laugh). I know it's nothing to be ashamed of and I have always been quite a patient person who doesn't rush into anything. It s just that lately I'm really starting to worry that I will never meet anyone and that I will be single for the rest of my life. I have always suffered from a lack of self esteem and I fear no one will ever be attracted to me. I also feel that I have no right even being a member of this site due to my great lack of experience.

    Hi PinkVixen90 welcome to the world of enlightened people I'm sure you will love the forum chat. As you have seen from the posts to your thread you are welcomed here as your own unique person and I believe that you should always embrace that fact (I will also say that to everyone on the forum, it will help you on your life journey). PinkVixen90 on your thoughts about your virginity, I like many others will tell you that please don't worry about losing your precious gift, better to keep it for when you want to give it to a person who your whole being will tell you is the right person for you. In this way it will be a more special moment in your lifetime to be cherished by both you and your chosen one. Bennyboy69
    1525454677
    Mr Cheeky Monkey [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 995
    • Joined: 31 Aug 2016

    Hi PinkVixen90, welcome to the forum :-)

    You don't need be nervous, no one here is going to laugh at you or judge you, we are a friendly, caring and understanding bunch.

    Please don't worry about losing your virginity, there is no rush. Take your time and you will find a genuine caring person who you will feel is right for you.

    I suffered with a lack of self esteem for years to an extent that I wouldnt look anyone in the face, I was tasked by a councillor to set myself a daily challenge eg make eye to eye contact with a total stranger and smile, give one person a compliment each day etc etc. This helped me, if you don't feel confident in trying something like this there are web sites on Google for beating a lack of self esteem which may help.

    I'm not great with words but I hope this helps a bit.

    Mr Cheeky

    1525466054
    VirginAngel [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 908
    • Joined: 1 Mar 2014

    Don't worry about being on here, im in the same position as you, but im 28.

    Medical issues have resulted in me being housebound and played the major part in why i still am, but i'm trying to get to know my own body to be confident IF or when the time comes.

    I understand the feeling embarrassed about it, but i've found the more open i am about it, the less it bothers me, and nobody has said anything negative to me about it at all who knows, in fact, a few males have told me when i find the right guy, it will be a good thing!

    1525483937
    VanillaWithSprinkles [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 402
    • Joined: 14 Feb 2018

    PinkVixen90 wrote:

    Thank you so much to everyone who responded (it has actually brought a few tears to my eyes). Your kindness and understanding, non judgemental replies have really reassured me. I just worry sometimes that if I were fortunate to meet that special someone, they may not be interested in me if I were to be completely honest and admit to being a virgin. I know there is nothing wrong with being a virgin but I don't want people to think that I'm a prude and not interested in sex because I am. It's just been through circumstances that I haven't yet met anyone I like enough to have a relationship with (I don't have any friends at the moment so I don't really get the chance to go out much).

    I was recently tempted to have a fling with someone in order to get it all over and done with. I know that may sound terrible to some but curiosity was really getting the better of me. In the end though I doubt that I could go through with it (I'm not judging anyone for having flings btw. I believe everyone is free to do what they want) as I know I would get emotionally attached to the person.

    Another thing I would like to add is that for all I may be a virgin, I still consider myself to be a sexual being as I love to use vibrators (especially the iconic rampant rabbits) and dildos (I have just purchased the 6' inch vibrating one. Can't wait for it to arrive!). I have a wardrobe full of toys and love using them on a regular basis. I do have times where I think it could be the closest thing I will ever have to an actual man but I guess I can't keep thinking like that.

    Thank you so much once again for all your lovely, kind replies. Posting on here was nowhere near as scary as I initially thought it would be lol.

    Hi PinkVixen,

    Just as a response to this, I was a virgin until about 6 months ago (I am 22) where I decided to 'lose it' on a one night stand. I was sick of waiting, all of my friends had done it and I just wanted to get it out of the way and over with. From personal experience please don't give into the temptation like I did, keep on waiting until the right person comes along- and they will.

    My night was painful, awful, embarassing and a complete cliche, the guy left the next day and now looks away whenever we pass in the street- mortifying! Not two weeks later I was asked on a date by my first ever boyfriend and when we had sex for the first time he actually made it a much better experience, still painful as hell but he looked after me emotionally.

    I get the stereotypes you're likely facing, I heard them all before, people assume that because you're a virgin you're prudish or frigid, where that simply isn't the case! I am incredibly kinky and that has not developed in the last 6 months since losing my virginity. I spent a long long time waiting for the right person only to fall at the final hurdle and I regret it tremendously. As a side note, I have found that guys find it incredibly sexy to find a virgin, they get a weird kick out of it so don't let that bother you at all. There is nothing wrong with you, you just haven't found a person who deserves you yet, don't settle, it really isn't worth it.

    xx

    1525509475
    Guy14357 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 514
    • Joined: 26 Jan 2018

    Vanilla is right. There’s a lot of us guys who’d like a virgin. Me included I have no idea why though.

    1525594512
    PinkVixen90 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major
    • Posts: 77
    • Joined: 28 Oct 2015

    VanillaWithSprinkles wrote:

    PinkVixen90 wrote:

    Thank you so much to everyone who responded (it has actually brought a few tears to my eyes). Your kindness and understanding, non judgemental replies have really reassured me. I just worry sometimes that if I were fortunate to meet that special someone, they may not be interested in me if I were to be completely honest and admit to being a virgin. I know there is nothing wrong with being a virgin but I don't want people to think that I'm a prude and not interested in sex because I am. It's just been through circumstances that I haven't yet met anyone I like enough to have a relationship with (I don't have any friends at the moment so I don't really get the chance to go out much).

    I was recently tempted to have a fling with someone in order to get it all over and done with. I know that may sound terrible to some but curiosity was really getting the better of me. In the end though I doubt that I could go through with it (I'm not judging anyone for having flings btw. I believe everyone is free to do what they want) as I know I would get emotionally attached to the person.

    Another thing I would like to add is that for all I may be a virgin, I still consider myself to be a sexual being as I love to use vibrators (especially the iconic rampant rabbits) and dildos (I have just purchased the 6' inch vibrating one. Can't wait for it to arrive!). I have a wardrobe full of toys and love using them on a regular basis. I do have times where I think it could be the closest thing I will ever have to an actual man but I guess I can't keep thinking like that.

    Thank you so much once again for all your lovely, kind replies. Posting on here was nowhere near as scary as I initially thought it would be lol.

    Hi PinkVixen,

    Just as a response to this, I was a virgin until about 6 months ago (I am 22) where I decided to 'lose it' on a one night stand. I was sick of waiting, all of my friends had done it and I just wanted to get it out of the way and over with. From personal experience please don't give into the temptation like I did, keep on waiting until the right person comes along- and they will.

    My night was painful, awful, embarassing and a complete cliche, the guy left the next day and now looks away whenever we pass in the street- mortifying! Not two weeks later I was asked on a date by my first ever boyfriend and when we had sex for the first time he actually made it a much better experience, still painful as hell but he looked after me emotionally.

    I get the stereotypes you're likely facing, I heard them all before, people assume that because you're a virgin you're prudish or frigid, where that simply isn't the case! I am incredibly kinky and that has not developed in the last 6 months since losing my virginity. I spent a long long time waiting for the right person only to fall at the final hurdle and I regret it tremendously. As a side note, I have found that guys find it incredibly sexy to find a virgin, they get a weird kick out of it so don't let that bother you at all. There is nothing wrong with you, you just haven't found a person who deserves you yet, don't settle, it really isn't worth it.

    xx

    Thank you so much Vanilla for your response. I'm sorry to read that you felt that way regarding your first time (although I can completely understand the temptation as I have previously pointed out). I'm so happy for you that you found someone special afterwards who treated you with respect. I really would ideally like my first time to be memorable for all the right reasons so I'm going to try my best to not give in to temptation as sex is something that is mentioned everywhere nowadays but I do get a lot of enjoyment from using my toys so at least I know a bit more about my body and what works for me.

    1525614402
    VanillaWithSprinkles [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 402
    • Joined: 14 Feb 2018

    Sounds like a much better plan than mine lol! Wish I'd have discovered LH before all of this happened but didn't stumble across it until after my first relationship was over. I admire what you're doing, truly, and wish you all the best!

    1525859646
    PinkVixen90 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major
    • Posts: 77
    • Joined: 28 Oct 2015

    VanillaWithSprinkles wrote:

    Sounds like a much better plan than mine lol! Wish I'd have discovered LH before all of this happened but didn't stumble across it until after my first relationship was over. I admire what you're doing, truly, and wish you all the best!

    Thank you Vanilla. All the best to you too

    Post a reply to this thread

    Please sign in to post messages to the forum.