1. Married people

    1508926354
    4Uonly [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
    • Posts: 623
    • Joined: 11 Nov 2016

    @Irie, please read my post again. Surely you know I'm not targeting at all men and please accept my apology if you feel you have been targeted.

    And if the person who has to blast the rock it got to be @BeautifullyChaotic.

    1508927346

    [suspended user]

    suspended user
    • Rank: Brigadier
    • Posts: 583
    • Joined: 4 Nov 2015

    I think my wife and I beat most of you as we have just past the golden one. We still have sex several times a week, Why, because we love and trust each other. We not only have sex with each other but with all of our trusted swinging friends together or seperately. I am her Sub and she my Dom and the love we have for each other works. If she wants to have fun with her friends male or female then so be it, she will tell all later on and if I come back with a well spanked backside she will check and even add her own hand marks. So love and trust is the key.

    1508929979
    4Uonly [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
    • Posts: 623
    • Joined: 11 Nov 2016

    4Uonly wrote:

    @Irie, please read my post again. Surely you know I'm not targeting at all men and please accept my apology if you feel you have been targeted.

    And if the person who has to blast the rock it got to be @BeautifullyChaotic.

    @Irie, please also look at the link which is in my post. Read the survey done for 11000 couples who are married for the 1st 2 years subtracting the religion part (which is my opinion).
    1509010768
    Mild & Creamy [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Officer Cadet
    • Posts: 1
    • Joined: 24 Oct 2017

    Married for 3 years now with 2 children 11 years apart (the teenager is my step son).

    We’ve always had a good sex life. But keeping that up becomes much harder with children. Simply a lack of time and of course my wife not being that interested for 2 years after the birth of our daughter.

    She used to have a bigger sex drive than me, but full time job, children and household maintenance makes us both very tired and either not up for it or firing out of sync.

    The thing we noticed we were doing was making sex a routine and simply following a formula. Which is fine because we didn’t have time for anything long or involved but made the sex less satisfying.

    Talking about it is important. Asking how you can make it better and reaffirming that it was good but you want to make it better works.

    Taking time to take care of yourself. I pointed my wife at the Pleasure Mechanics podcast that had an episode on sex after baby that helped.

    It’s fun and easy to have freewheeling sex when there’s no children or other commitments. But there are times where that’s not the case for very long stretches. You’ve then got to put a lot of effort into it. And also recognise that it is important and worth the time and effort.

    Talking honestly in a constructive way is most important though.

    1509011422
    Tazzy84red [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 972
    • Joined: 18 Aug 2017

    I've been with hubby 17 years we have 3 boys together 10. 9 and nearly 2. We have had dry spells but on average we still have sex 3 times a week.
    We find being honest with what we like and the aid of toys and role play keeps us going. Although we do have lots of vanilla sex too. Some times we have just a quickie other times full on sesh with lots of toys and ties.
    Think it's normal for dips in sex.

    1509120328
    MrsND [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 95
    • Joined: 6 Feb 2017

    We have been together for 11yrs however only married 1. We have together since i was 15 and he 17.
    We have had dry spells. Many infact. We have 2 children which didnt help.
    However before we got married we talked about all aspects of our relationship and sex did come up. Thats when we found love honey. Many toys and trying new things later we have the best sex life we have ever had.
    If we feel things are drying up we have these
    https://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=35690
    Which helps to kick start things again.
    Communication is also the key. Being open about sex has been the turning point for me and hubby

    1509376918
    loopyfrank [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant
    • Posts: 4
    • Joined: 30 Oct 2017

    we have been married for 24 years, and did go through a bad patch a few months back involving chat sites...anyway that aside we talked and our sex life is the best it has ever been. I have a little notebook in my drawer and we write things in there that we sould like to do together. It has been brilliant looking at our different ideas and trying them out ;) Our children are all now older with the youngest being 11 and we are making sure we have date nights and being spontanious a(as you can with a house of 7) but you must keep talking and our purchases form LH as well as other places have helped spice things up x

    1509409795
    4Uonly [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
    • Posts: 623
    • Joined: 11 Nov 2016

    @loopyfrank, if you can share a little more in details about the problem and solutions I'm sure it will benefit some married couples who were in your position.

    I like your little note book very much, the constant talking and the purchases from LH. In marriage life sometimes the most easier thing to do we tend to forget.

    1509637224
    goodlove [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Captain
    • Posts: 31
    • Joined: 27 Apr 2017

    We are thirty years married. When the kids left home we had to re-connect so to speak. When the children were growing up we both were very arttentive parents. Now the kids have left home we found that we found we had time to get to know each other again. Honesty and cmmunication is very important we talk about everything, fears, desires and asperations. We spend time together just doing fun things. To keep the passion alive, or as we found we re-kindled it. When we were younger we were pretty vanilla, now we make time to make love, we experiment, we bought toys and outfits, we take our time over sex, we talk about it before and after, what we liked, what we did'nt we try most things onece, if we like it we do it again, sometimes again and again. I dont want to sould too clinical but it really works for us, we would never have thought a year ago we would be writing reviews on sex toys and lingerie, never mind getting great enjoyment in using them together.

    1509742431
    MrH_Sweetgirl [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 49
    • Joined: 23 Jul 2017

    Hello, MrH and I have been together for 23 years and married for 18. In that time out sex life has gone through many phases, initially we couldnt get enough of each other (as is quite usual) and we continued to have regular sex until I had a breakdown. For a few years things became quite difficult - my depression left me feeling unattractive and I put a lot of weight on which didnt help... no matter how much MrH would assure me that he still found me attractive I couldn't see how he could when I felt so disgusting in my own skin. I managed to loose some weight following an operation, and as I lost weight I began to feel more like my old self. MrH has never been overtly affectionate or passionate... public displays of affection were not his thing and so I have got used to that... but earlier this year I plucked up the courage to ask if MrH would consider a change in our relationship... I've always been very aroused by bondage and Submission - I read extensively and once read the Beauty Books by Anne Rice (no vampires in sight) and was extreemly turned on - but never had the courage to express this to MrH.... So one day I asked him to read an extract from 50 Shades of Gray, and simply said.. I would love it if we could try this.....

    This simple sentence opened the door for some of the most intimate and honest conversations we have ever had... researching the world of BDSM and talking about what interests us and what we want to try has made our relationship stonger and more passionate than it has been for some time... MrH is my Dom and I love being his submissive (which would surpise anyone who knows me as I am quite a dominant personality - in fact MrH didnt think I would like it) I love our new found passion, MrH messages me thoughout the day asking how I am, he tells me how sexy I am and how much he loves me, he messages me with little dirty things (like ... I wish I could do XXXX to you right now) which starts little sexting conversations... little things which have worked to keep our passion up...

    I am not saying that BDSM is going to keep passion alive for everyone... and BDSM is possibly more varied than you may think... the 4 letters actually cover 3 different areas:

    BD - Bondage and Discapline

    DS - Dominance and Submission

    SM - Sadism and Machicism (I am not a great speller!)

    MrH and I only explore BDS as we are not interesting is SM at all. Obviously some of our play sessions can be quite noisy and our children are now 19 and 24 and we don't get a lot of true alone time with them living at home, so we started going away to a hotel just once or twice a month for some real alone time. We treasure these nights away.

    This new relationship dynamic has made cuch a massive change to every aspect of our lives... I snuggle next to MrH watching TV, we touch more, holding hands, kissing, he strokes my hair and face. I keep a diary of how I feel and things I am enjoying and ask MrH to read it so he knows what I am thinking... I write fantasy stories which he reads so he can plan play sessions to incorporate my fantasies - and he has done the same... MrH also sends me instructions like while he is in the bath I am to put specific outfits on and he will tell me what he plans to do when he gets in the room... this anticipation makes the next few hours lots of fun :-)

    Anyway I do hope that this helps you with ideas... but again I stress... I am not saying this will work for everyone but it is definately whats working for me and MrH.

    Sweetgirl.

    1509820786
    Peakcouple [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
    • Posts: 328
    • Joined: 10 Sep 2014

    We started swinging a few weeks after we got together and have been doing it regularly for the last 13 years. We married after two years but kept on swinging at the same rate, roughly each month. That doesn't mean our sex together is lacking anything, far from it as it is always the best! But it keeps things erotic and meets our needs - we're both very highly sexed. The main thing is communication, we discuss what we want, what weve done and how we feel continually. We never argue about anything sexual, compromise is the key. It has worked very well for us.

    1510052898
    4Uonly [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
    • Posts: 623
    • Joined: 11 Nov 2016

    Peakcouple wrote:

    We started swinging a few weeks after we got together and have been doing it regularly for the last 13 years. We married after two years but kept on swinging at the same rate, roughly each month. That doesn't mean our sex together is lacking anything, far from it as it is always the best! But it keeps things erotic and meets our needs - we're both very highly sexed. The main thing is communication, we discuss what we want, what weve done and how we feel continually. We never argue about anything sexual, compromise is the key. It has worked very well for us.

    I'm so jealous... Great couple! 👫
    1510076271
    Tiger Dick [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 1106
    • Joined: 9 Nov 2016

    Peakcouple wrote:

    We started swinging a few weeks after we got together and have been doing it regularly for the last 13 years. We married after two years but kept on swinging at the same rate, roughly each month. That doesn't mean our sex together is lacking anything, far from it as it is always the best! But it keeps things erotic and meets our needs - we're both very highly sexed. The main thing is communication, we discuss what we want, what weve done and how we feel continually. We never argue about anything sexual, compromise is the key. It has worked very well for us.

    We've just started that journey after being together 32 years, having a ball and have met some great people along the way. Communication, as you've said is key and since starting swinging, we have opened up more than ever and we're having the best sex between us that we ever have. We both have an appetite to explore new things and are about to go to our first sex party...

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