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  1. Sex Club Advice

    Bigtrak [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2357
    • Joined: 17 Nov 2010

    So my wife has suddenly gone major exited over adding a femal encounter to our relationship. Now it's something that excites me immensely. I'd love to see her with a woman. I'd also like to experience the lifestyle and fill in the small gaps in our sexual relationship.

    Now we have joined Fab Swingers yesterday and talked clubs.

    I thin I prefer the idea of a club first so we can treat slowly and softly into this world. We are close without being too close to Vanilla Alternative and Liberty Elite clubs.

    So any advice on any of swingers clubs, MFF threesomes or fabswingers?

    Lovehoney - Paige [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1368
    • Joined: 28 Mar 2014

    I don't really have any advice or experience in this department however. The golden rule for everything: communication is key!

    Make sure you both understand what you are getting into, set guidelines if neccesary, think of situations and ensure the other person knows you are comfortable/uncomfortable.

    Good luck!!

    Tiger Dick [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 1448
    • Joined: 9 Nov 2016

    Hi there Bigtrak, exciting times ahead if you follow the rules you set yourselves.

    These need to be in place to keep yourselves within your safe places and don't let others persuade you otherwise. It can so easily, particularly in the moment move from these and put you both into a place where you don't want to be. It is flattering, to say the least, that others want to engage in sexual acts with you, however, it is you that have to live with yourselves and as long as you've both kept to YOUR rules, you'll almost certainly be fine.

    As Paige as mentioned, communication, as with most things in life is the key to getting this right. Rules are a formal communication agreement, have your no blame one in place too. The one that says at any time either of you can back out and the other will do so without hesitation or blame. This is a mind game, as much as a physical thing, the nerves before hand can be really powerful, but as long as you both respect each other and prioritise their welfare above anything else I'm sure you'll have a great time.

    Bigtrak [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2357
    • Joined: 17 Nov 2010

    Thanks Guys

    hornyleekbloke [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major
    • Posts: 163
    • Joined: 27 Dec 2012

    We have over 5 years of experience between us (and I've got over 15 years on my own) The main thing I'd say is communication, communication and communication. You both need to be absolutely clear in your communication with each other no matter what it is.

    We're on FAB and these days it's anything but. There are an awful lot of time wasters on there these days... Try Social Swinging. It's fairly new so there aren't a huge number of people, but it's a much much better site. Prepare to have your time wasted by couples and single women (especially single women...) Single guys will constantly wink/message you unless you change your filters to stop them.

    Can I just say - a guy who wants to see his lady with another woman... How original ! I jest of course! I've experienced this through us meeting couples. All I can say is prepare yourself.

    Equality is important. You (naturally) want to see your lady with another woman - how would you feel if she suddenly turned around and said she wanted another man? We've experienced this. From my perspective I was absolutely fine with it - and an MMF is something we continue to do. That being said, the first few times it was very weird seeing someone else penetrating my GF. Not in an uncomfortable way.

    I'd agree with you that clubs are the best way for newbies to go. You can check out the scene and, in a good club, you'll never be pressured to play. (It's called 'playing' just FYI.) Additionally, you may be invited to join a couple.

    The single woman to join you. In the scene, they are known as unicorns - and with good reason. A single woman is very hard to come by. We've been trying for an MFF for 5 years now. So far - nada. We've met a lot of woman who claim to be experienced and bi, but you soon find out they're like the idea but the reality scares the bejesus out of them. If you speak to one on FAB and arrange to meet in a club, be prepared for her to arrive with a FWB or FB she's not mentioned to you. Then be prepared to not get close to her because he's possessive...

    Rules shall be broken. Prepare yourself for that as best you can. My last swinging ex and I had a rule that we would never full-swap. In Atlantis one night, a guy was playing with her and she was enjoying it more than either of us expected. In the end, we had our first MMF. We broke our own rules. It was fantastic! Swinging is a very fluid thing, so don't expect your set of rules to remain constant.

    I usually structure my replies more, but it's now nearly 1am and Grammarly (a browser plugin) keeps telling me I can't spell.

    We have our very first MFF meet soon (hopefully) If it happens, I'll return to provide advice on what to expect!

    Good luck!

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