• Wait! We think you’re in the US - Lovehoney.com is a better site for you.
    Shop there and get 10% off!
    United States Flag
    Go to Lovehoney.com
  1. Swinging

    1504696253
    Pudgie [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant
    • Posts: 37
    • Joined: 2 May 2007

    My partner keeps mentioning swinging or having a threesum/foursum with other couples.

    Just wondered what everyone's views are on this? If anyone does it? How do you even instigate it?

    1504696536
    J&K2016 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major
    • Posts: 54
    • Joined: 10 Mar 2016

    We have done it. The only thing I would say is your relationship has to be 100% secure before you think about taking part, if it's not don't do it. Also, if you or your partner, are jealous don't do it as you will regret it forever.

    if you are serious join FabSwingers and see what couples and clubs are in your area. Always meet socially first before moving into swinging to make sure there is an attraction and connection

    feel free to ask any advice or questions, more than happy to help

    1504696809
    Pudgie [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant
    • Posts: 37
    • Joined: 2 May 2007

    Thanks J&K 2016 I'm not sure how I feel about it if I'm honest

    1504697169
    J&K2016 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major
    • Posts: 54
    • Joined: 10 Mar 2016

    Pudgie wrote:

    Thanks J&K 2016 I'm not sure how I feel about it if I'm honest

    If you are unsure then it's not for you. Don't just take our advice, let others give their opinion also

    1504697578
    BigInBerks [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 129
    • Joined: 21 Aug 2017

    There's a recent thread on having sex in front of others here: https://www.lovehoney.co.uk/community/forums/sex-tips-and-talk/1626467-being-watched-having-sex-need-advice-plz/

    As you can see, swinging clubs are very laid back. You can visit without any need to take part. As a first step, when (and if) you are ready, you could consider visiting a club, just to see what happens.

    1504698179
    Lovehoney - Jess Wilde [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2115
    • Joined: 30 Nov 2012

    My only tip would be to trust your gut in this instance. If you really aren't into the idea, then that's absolutely your right to feel that way. If you're initially not sure but are curious, then I'd recommend doing a bit of research (as you are now).

    Just remember that being proud/firm of what you don't like/want to try is just as important as being proud/firm with what you do like/want to try.

    Also remember that even if you show some interest you always have the right to take a step back (or forwards) at any point. Just coz you show a little interest doesn't mean you're "all in" and consent is a fluid thing which can be given or taken away whenever you want (repeatedly if you wish). 

    Oh and saying "yes" once doesn't mean "yes" forever. So if you are curious but are worried about what might happen if you change your mind after trying swinging or a threesome, just remember that you can always say "no" later and decide it's not something you want to do again. 

    Good luck! 

    1504709637
    DNK [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Officer Cadet
    • Posts: 3
    • Joined: 21 Jul 2016

    We have tried it and enjoyed it but it's not something we will rush into doing again. But the option is always there if we decide to.

    Make sure you're 100% secure with your relationship and that's for both people. If you think there's the slightest chance either you or your partner won't like someone else touching or having sex with you or your partner, don't do it.

    And remember, even if you agree you can stop at any time. You're not forced to do it and if one person wants to stop, the other should agree and stop too.

    Hopefully you make the right choice as to whether to try it or not and if you do I hope you have fun

    1504806486
    Pudgie [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant
    • Posts: 37
    • Joined: 2 May 2007

    Hi everyone

    Thank you for your replies I am seriously thinking about going to a swinging club with my partner I know it's a silly question but what actually happens I have it in my head it will be full of sleazy people etc but I bet it's not

    1504815751
    Bigtrak [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 1648
    • Joined: 17 Nov 2010

    We are both intrigued.....but maybe at fantasy level. Although I'm very sure I'd enjoy it and it would let her explore her Bisexuality. But not sure we'd ever go.

    1504819950
    ComeHereBabe [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Officer Cadet
    • Posts: 9
    • Joined: 4 Jun 2014

    I think it's great. Many people go to just watch initially because it can be overwhelming to start with, particularly for men who have to work harder at initiating contact and then also to perform to a high standard.

    Very liberating experience and a huge confidence boost for ladies - provided you're open minded enough to relax and enjoy it.

    1504946670
    aanda [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 157
    • Joined: 17 Oct 2009

    we used to swing, we enjoyed it for a while, and have made some great friends that we are still intouch with now, we stopped because, clubs wer not our thing and meeting online was mad trying to sort out the idiots from the real people, alot of couples do it because only one of them really wants to, these are not fun people to play with, make 100% sure your both wanting to do it, then enjoy, but if not 100% find another fetish, like role play

    1505905030
    LOVE [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 196
    • Joined: 19 Jan 2009

    you must both be into it 110 per cent and talk about what you are willing to do with the people you meet and make rules and respect everybodys limits

    we do meet o bi males only

    be prepared to have a lot of non meets if you are using contact sites,we do

    but when we find right people to peform with we enjoy the extra fun

    1505974851
    4Uonly [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 195
    • Joined: 11 Nov 2016

    Will definitely give it a try at Cupids Swingers club in my next visit to UK. Very good reviews. Like the facts that the swingers abides by the rules strictly.

    1505981827
    Philma45 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Captain
    • Posts: 25
    • Joined: 8 Sep 2013

    You have to be 100% sure in your relationship and discuss it before you embark. We have done it a number of times mainly with friends where we knew we all had an interest in the other people involved. We have always enjoyed it and have often repeated it with the same couples.

    Post a reply to this thread

    Please sign in to post messages to the forum.