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  1. Post menopausal sex drive or lack of it.

    BigBikeGuy [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 446
    • Joined: 16 May 2008

    So my sex drive is the same as it's always been (i'd say high) but over the last 5 or 6 months the OH has seen hers virtually die, she's 51 post menopausal...

    Is this usual, we've always been fairly well matched so this strange for us. She says she just doesn't fancy it... To be fair she's as fed up with the situation as I am. When we do have sex it's as good as ever, and she says we should do it more often but then she doesn't feel like it. We've discussed it and decided to make the best of it when she is in the mood.

    Can any ladies in the same position offer any advice or help, is there any thing she can do to get it back? thanks.

    toulouse [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Captain
    • Posts: 79
    • Joined: 6 Jun 2017


    Oh yes I can totally relate to this. I had two years of this! One minute I would feel very sexy and would want sex and then within literally ten minutes the feeling would just disappear,leaving my OH very frustrated. I would also have weeks of not being interested at all and then it was as if someone had turned a switch and I would change.

    Having hot flushes didn't help either as I couldn't' bare to be touched when I felt so hot and my skin felt prickly....I also had anxiety symptoms with it which didn't help me feel sexy. I used to get so cross with myself as I fancied my OH as much as ever but just couldn't motivate myself to do anything about it.

    Menopausal women also have dry bodily fluid problems which can be quite scary for us and make us feel insecure.

    I even didn't want to kiss for a while in case it led on to something else.

    We dealt with it by talking about it a lot and I had to reassure my OH that I still fancied him, I explained that he had to catch me when my hormones were up.easier said than done.

    Thankfully though he was really patient and understanding and I am out the other side.

    We tried and explored different things to try and get my interest back and just cuddled for a while. We went for intimate meals and I dressed up. I also talked it through with my friend's and slowly but surely the sexy feelings came back. I have to say not as strong as they were but it is fine.

    BigBikeGuy [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 446
    • Joined: 16 May 2008

    Thanks toulouse, good to hear from someone who's been through it, she says she still fancys me (and the bloke from Poldark) Though it's hard for her to do anything about it, it never seems to be the right time, that said we've just come back from holiday and we did manage a couple of sessions.
    I find it difficult as I feel a bit unwanted, I can empathise but I can't really understand how she feels.

    Don't know if there is any other way of coping, haven't looked at anything to improve her sex drive as yet.

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