• Anxious about a potential fetish - help!

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    LilyGreen [sign in to see picture]
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    So, I identify as demisexual, and don't really find porn involving real people particularly sexy, thankfully, the Internet provides as always with animated porn and hentai. I also have the reassurance of knowing that anyone involved isn't being abused in participating because they're just voice actors.

    Other background information, I have generalised anxiety disorder and over the last year I've gone through a lot of trauma with my family - serious illness etc. I'm seeing a psychotherapist for my mental health.

    A couple of weeks ago, after a long day, I went looking for some hentai to get myself off with and relax before bed, and ran across a tentacle rape video. I watched most of it, at first out of curiosity and then because I just couldn't look away. It was horrible. After I masturbated I felt sick and ashamed. I vomited and barely slept.

    I put it out of mind until the other day - I sometimes masturbate as a migraine cure, but found that I just couldn't get off. After about fifteen minutes of nothing I vaguely wondered about tentacles and came almost immediately.
    Last night the thought suddenly hit me that I might have irrevocably damaged my sexuality by watching that stupid video. I'm going to discuss this with my therapist next week, but I threw up again from the worry last night.
    I'm really scared, but I know that someone in this wonderful community will have some kind words for me. All I've been able to find is 4chan types being cruel and shaming people for their fetishes.
    I don't want to only ever be turned on by the thought of tentacles, if anyone has a story about a similar issue they worked through, that would be especially helpful.

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    GollyGotha [sign in to see picture]
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    Don't worry, there is nothing wrong with finding hentai which involves tentacles arousing and no, you haven't damaged your sexuality by watching it.

    My knowledge of the history of hentai is limited, but I know that the reason it was created was because they had to, by law, pixelate the genitalia and one of the ways around this censorship, was to create porn which used phalic objects such as tentacles as an alternative to penises.

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    LilyGreen [sign in to see picture]
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    Thanks Gollygotha, I just needed to hear that from someone else. On a rational level I know a fetish or kink isn't a big deal, but I'm honestly kind of inexperienced in general and don't have a lot of perspective or context. I don't know how this could impact my sex life in the future and the uncertainty is pretty frightening. Irrational me says I'm broken forever and ever with only animated tentacle porn to satisfy me.
    I really do need some reassurance that that is irrational thinking and not how it works :(

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    *sexybabe* [sign in to see picture]
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    Some of the things I used to get off on when I was younger don't appeal to me now, so you may not always find it arousing. And there will be other things which arouse you that you probably haven't discovered yet! But it's only a fantasy anyway.

    I sometimes fantasise about public rape, it doesn't mean in any way at all that I would enjoy that if it happened in real life, nor is it the only way I can get off. It actually horrifies and disgusts me but for some reason, it also turns me on.

    I used to worry that sort of fantasy made me weird or horrible, but now I realise it's just something that occasionally turns me on. And it really isn't anything you should be ashamed of, lots of us have 'strange' fantasies!

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    NatandTom [sign in to see picture]
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    I don't think tentacles or hentai is a weird thing to be aroused by at all. It's super popular. They even make dildos that are tentacle inspired!

    I have this https://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=21487 and I love it.

    Having a fantasy that seems 'out of the box' doesn't make you horrible. It makes you human. A huge portion of the worlds population have fetishes or kinks and that's all this is. As long as you are not hurting anybody (unless it's consensual) then there's no problems. You're free to enjoy and get off to whatever you want. Just maybe avoid the videos that upset you in the future and stick to regular hentai!

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    Sex Squid [sign in to see picture]
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    NatandTom wrote:

    I don't think tentacles or hentai is a weird thing to be aroused by at all. It's super popular. They even make dildos that are tentacle inspired!

    I have this https://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=21487 and I love it.

    Having a fantasy that seems 'out of the box' doesn't make you horrible. It makes you human. A huge portion of the worlds population have fetishes or kinks and that's all this is. As long as you are not hurting anybody (unless it's consensual) then there's no problems. You're free to enjoy and get off to whatever you want. Just maybe avoid the videos that upset you in the future and stick to regular hentai!

    Always on point Nat... +1
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    The Woodie [sign in to see picture]
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    I agree with Nat.

    I am learning what it is that turns me on.

    Some of it is not what is my expectation of normal.

    I have no experience of hentai.

    I don't make a snap decision on what turns me on based on one experience. I have to process the details based on when, where and why.

    Being on here will allow you to access a broader knowledge base of experience.

    It is giving me more confidence that I am not the only person having the thought and am not completely left field. I hope it does the same for you.

    As they say, knowledge is power and the more knowledge you have the more power you have over the doubts in your mind.

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    Bigtrak [sign in to see picture]
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    If it makes you cum and it harms no one then go with the flow. Seriously who are you hurting?

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    VioletWolf [sign in to see picture]
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    I've enjoyed a bit of hentai in the past, it's really nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed of! We're all into different things. I like Daddy doms, and in honesty it absolutely disgusted me in the beginning, I found it hard to work out just how I could be turned on by a Daddy when it all revolves around my daddy issues and the hate I have for my father. It just didn't make sense! And there are a lot of people out there that don't understand it, or simply don't like it, but that doesn't mean it's wrong. And that's the same for your tentacle rape hentai, don't be afraid of it, it's not wrong.

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    mysteron [sign in to see picture]
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    As long as you are consenting adults and its legal then go for it. Doesnt matter what others think .

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    hippy [sign in to see picture]
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    If there was no call.for it there wouldn't be any. No one was hurt by what you did and you are enjoying it sexually then it's not wrong.
    Many people have interesting kinks and maybe you've found yours or it system temporary.

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    KingGrthy [sign in to see picture]
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    Hey Lilygreen, check out a site called primal hardware.

    not sure what the rules are around this, I know shouldn't post a competitors website, while they are sex toys though, they are not really in the same market as Lovehoney lol, thought you might get a kick out of seeing it though.

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