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  1. delaying ejaculation help?

    1486162207
    Tholuc [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant
    • Posts: 35
    • Joined: 25 Apr 2016

    I only lost my virginity a year ago, and I'm pretty sure I was masturbating before in a verryy incorrect manner, so now I always cum really quickly. like. Really. quickly. I've tried using a cock ring, using delay lube (although only once), I'm trying using a stamina fleshlight, relaxing, breathing techniques, pretty much everything I can think of, and so far no tangible results. I think reverse kegels are promising, but does anyone have any other advice?? My girlfriend reassures me it's fine but personally I'd want to go for a lot longer

    1486167327
    RosyCheek [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2685
    • Joined: 11 Apr 2016

    How quickly is really quickly for you? I've been with my husband for 12 years now and he still lasts for around 5minutes or so, a little longer with cock rings. We introduce longer foreplay to make up for it.

    You may still be over excited for it being sex and not a bit of self love if that make any sense.

    1486177034
    MrH [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Officer Cadet
    • Posts: 3
    • Joined: 12 Oct 2014

    I suffer from PE too. You are not alone. I can only go a minute or so and I've tried lots. I'm currently doing a stop start method, when I feel I'm about to cum I stop everything, thenI go again slowly, then stop.

    Same with masturbation, for around 5 minutes if you can, then longer and longer.

    1486199610
    Vampiror [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 35
    • Joined: 21 Nov 2013

    I suffer from PE as well. I have tried all sorts of things like what has been said so far but the only thing that has really worked for me was a delay spray.

    The one I have is no longer sold on LH. But these maybe worth a try

    http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=35203 or

    http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=30900

    I tend to spray it on and put a condom on as I found without it wore off quicker.

    hope this helps and you find a solution that works for you.

    1486204715
    emergencyexit [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
    • Posts: 85
    • Joined: 6 Feb 2013

    This delay spray really made a difference for us: http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=18912

    1486213417
    4Uonly [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
    • Posts: 475
    • Joined: 11 Nov 2016

    My hub is a quicky and I know how frustrating it can be when you are about to cum and there he goes! To overcome the problem we explored many areas and ways. Think what most guys are doing (maybe called training), be it start/stop or breathing out heavily/relaxing the muscles didn't really improved our situation. So for the last 20 years hub and I decided go slow in almost anything within the 4 walls. Situation change and he's able to control longer but still misfired when external influence comes into play. So we put all those things/actions aside till we are ready to go for the dive.
    We talk about anything and enjoy each others body during the slow and long foreplay. When hub id it's always slow and every thrush feels good for him and me. And when I'm near the ball will roll faster and we always had it together. It's not something we achieved instantly...but built over some years. You might want to take your time and go for a long foreplay. See if it helps. Good luck.

    1486215227
    jaymma [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Captain
    • Posts: 130
    • Joined: 12 Feb 2014

    What actually constitutes premature ejaculation? Going from the moment penis is inserted, how long are we talking is premature?

    1486221966
    4Uonly [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
    • Posts: 475
    • Joined: 11 Nov 2016

    Dictionary calls it a psychosexual disorder but I prefer the layman. Cumming before your woman had hers and not being able to continue to take her there.

    Hence in my opinion it's not a disorder and time doesn't come into play. Men are created that way.
    ...Oops! Maybe not all.

    1486222051
    Fredster [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 76
    • Joined: 10 Mar 2016

    Cant offer any help here but trust me.. I have the opposite problem and that's not so much fun either .. gets a tad sore after 2-3 hours

    1486230636
    Quiet ones are worse! [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 1236
    • Joined: 24 Jun 2012

    If you play with yourself to the point of ejaculation, then have sex with your girlfriend only a short time later is it the same effect?

    Whilst not a solution, perhaps try using a sleeve like this or similar http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=36124 it dulls the sensation for you so maybe better or wear a strapon http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=35671  to use on your girlfriend and she may also use it on you?

    1486236522
    NatandTom [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 6677
    • Joined: 6 Jun 2015

    Have you tried edging? It takes some trial and error and won't help over night, but it will train you how to last longer over time. I think there's quite a few threads on it, so I'll see if I can find some for you :)

    1486253449
    Alicia4Ever [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1757
    • Joined: 27 Feb 2010

    There is something else you could try. There have been a number of guys come on here with the opposite problem to what you have; and for the most part it could be put down to heavy handed masturbation making it hard for them to get off through PIV sex, because they become used to the strong sensations a hand can produce.If you were careful not to over do it and end up with that opposite proble it may help your situation.

    Other things you can do are keep changing positions, as the time it takes to change can give you a short break from stimulation, letting you cool off so to speak. Try as many different positions as you can think of, and see if there are any which don't do it for you quite so much. so you can use this position to start with and switch to one which turns you on more to finnish; you may of course like them all as much as each other, but it may be worth a try.

    If you get more stimulation from what you are seeing as many guys do, you could try being blindfolded; but again some people find that more of a turn on.

    Try the old trick of thinking about something other than what you are doing, eventually you can learn to control the intensity of your sexual thoughts during sex, if you keep trying.

    Do you clench your pelvic floor muscules, which increases the strength of your erection an so can make you come faster, if you do you can try not to do this during sex, it may help. You may find that doing several of such things at the same time will give better control than just trying to use one.

    Find out if there are any thrusting techniques that give you less stimulation, such as short and shallow in between slow, longer deeper thrusts, or full withdrawal after each thrust, or full penetration and more grind your hips than in out thrusting, your OH may like this, as if you get it right it can give good clitoral stimulation, and give you minimum stimulation on your shaft.

    You don't say how long you last but, I remember LH Jess commenting a while ago that the average is only 5 or 6 minutes. It can be as much about all the other things that you can do in lovemaking, rather than just concentrating on PIV sex. It's just getting your head round it' as nature tells you that PIV sex is what you should be doing.

    If you are still having trouble, it is worth noting that it likley won't be an instant fix, it will be something you have to learn over time, and with persiverence.

    1486289453
    Daleh90 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
    • Posts: 285
    • Joined: 7 Oct 2014

    Have you tried the extended pleasure condoms
    http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=343
    Bought the by accident it the toilets when I was drunk, don't think I came at all the night, but my girlfriend did a good few times, just don't put it on inside out lol

    1486415200
    Tholuc [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant
    • Posts: 35
    • Joined: 25 Apr 2016

    Like instantaneously quick, one pump pony is a phrase that comes to mind :/ I might try the delay spray again, it seems to have worked for some people. And As you mentioned Alicia4ever I do think the main problem is the clenching of the pelvic floor muscles, which I've noticed since and I've been trying to reverse. During edging though, I've waited until I've felt okay but then as soon as we go again it's like I already need to stop. I dont know I'll try a combination of things, see what works

    1486423502
    sexyfuntime [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Officer Cadet
    • Posts: 3
    • Joined: 31 Jan 2017

    this is the only method that works for me. and if I'm not wearing a condom if finish even faster

    1486442644
    4Uonly [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
    • Posts: 475
    • Joined: 11 Nov 2016

    I'm just wondering how unsatisfied a man will be if he is denied the "feeling" leading to orgasm. I like my hub to feel me as much as he id. Any other methods to control his orgasm besides having his P going dumb needs to be explored successfully and jointly.
    Question? Will using delaying spray cause dumbness. If it does how is he going to sustain his erection?

    1486456626
    NaughtyNerd [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1127
    • Joined: 16 Aug 2016

    Sorry 4UOnly, I know your question was a serious one but your auto correct made my morning..
    "will using delay spray cause dumbness.."

    Delay spray de-sensitizes the user a bit so they don't get as excited so to speak, not complete numbness.

    1486457622

    [suspended user]

    suspended user
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 4024
    • Joined: 4 Dec 2012

    Delay sprays do cause temporary numbness - it's how they work.
    It's a bit like extreme pins and needles - you know you're being touched but you can't really feel it. With some delay sprays I've been so desensitised that keeping an erection is a near impossibility.

    1486466146
    4Uonly [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
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    @NaughtyNerd, thousand apologies.

    1486607789
    4Uonly [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
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    • Joined: 11 Nov 2016

    Sum Sub wrote:

    Delay sprays do cause temporary numbness - it's how they work.
    It's a bit like extreme pins and needles - you know you're being touched but you can't really feel it. With some delay sprays I've been so desensitised that keeping an erection is a near impossibility.

    If it caused numbness won't it be bad news for those having ED. Think some men needs the sensation feelings to stay awake too. Hmmmp...

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