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  1. Some spanking advice please

    1483482111
    delilahxx [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 5540
    • Joined: 12 Mar 2013

    Hey everyone

    So I'm in a new relationship, we've known each other 12 weeks, have met twice (it's a LDR). We have spoken on the phone and skyped lots, so we are getting to know each other really well.

    His last relationship was very vanilla (his words), but he is very open minded to trying new things. We have talked about spanking, which we really want to try together. He has very little experience of this. I have a bit more, in my last relationship we did spanking quite a lot but it was more of a Dom/sub role.

    My new man isn't a Dom, so this kind of approach isn't going to work. So how can we get into the spanking in a natural way, without going down the whole 'you've been a naughty girl' type thing.

    Any advice greatly received :)

    1483483072
    Just Jenson [sign in to see picture]
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    Just go for it.

    Last time I got involved with spanking was part of a very sensual massage which progressed to different sensuality type playing using warm and cold, scratching as well as spanking with a paddle and flogging too.

    Spanking doesn't have to be a punishment, hence the 'naughty girl' scenario and can always be regarded as a treat too.

    Just remember if if he is new to it all, that you will need to do a lot of communication so he knows what your body is in tune with.

    I've seen newbies go straight in heavy handed and ruin a scene for the receiver, since they think it's like they've seen it in the movies!

    1483483091

    [suspended user]

    suspended user
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    Just talk about it D, pull down your trousers, bend over and let him spank you...

    "yes I liked that, can you do it harder."

    "maybe a bit quicker between hits next time"

    "not so high up near the back"

    Just like you might if he was using a dildo on you or something, tell him what is good and what is not good - it doesn't have to be in the guise of reward/punishment - if you can aliken it to other sexual activity then it'll all click into place

    I wrote a thing on the blog that'll help too

    1483483258
    Sxleksaker [sign in to see picture]
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    I think it would be easy for him to incorporate some spanking with his palm while in doggy style :)

    1483483448
    NaughtyNerd [sign in to see picture]
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    Maybe a sexy message first with some nice oil. He can spank you bum then rub it better.

    1483483498
    Scorpius12 [sign in to see picture]
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    Sum Sub wrote:

    Just talk about it D, pull down your trousers, bend over and let him spank you...

    "yes I liked that, can you do it harder."

    "maybe a bit quicker between hits next time"

    "not so high up near the back"

    Just like you might if he was using a dildo on you or something, tell him what is good and what is not good - it doesn't have to be in the guise of reward/punishment - if you can aliken it to other sexual activity then it'll all click into place

    I wrote a thing on the blog that'll help too

    +1 Just tell him how much it turns you on, and how it makes you feel. I'm sure that when he sees your reaction there will be no issues with it - lol ;) xx

    1483488634
    mysteron [sign in to see picture]
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    • Joined: 7 Jan 2014

    Stick your bottom out inviting him to give you a playful spank. That's how we started and now my Mrs is always doing it as part of our normal interaction when we are alone. It will help him to normalise it.

    1483668604
    delilahxx [sign in to see picture]
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    Thank you everyone for the advice :)

    I'm now feeling much more confident about the whole thing. I know he is going to be more nervous than me and maybe feel awkward, so it's really up to me to make sure the whole situation is relaxed and natural.

    Excited but a little nervous :)

    1483701507
    cobra1987 [sign in to see picture]
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    You could try role playing and bring spanking in to it. I know this would work well.

    1483741519
    Terri JJ [sign in to see picture]
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    Scorpius12 wrote:

    Sum Sub wrote:

    Just talk about it D, pull down your trousers, bend over and let him spank you...

    "yes I liked that, can you do it harder."

    "maybe a bit quicker between hits next time"

    "not so high up near the back"

    Just like you might if he was using a dildo on you or something, tell him what is good and what is not good - it doesn't have to be in the guise of reward/punishment - if you can aliken it to other sexual activity then it'll all click into place

    I wrote a thing on the blog that'll help too

    +1 Just tell him how much it turns you on, and how it makes you feel. I'm sure that when he sees your reaction there will be no issues with it - lol ;) xx

    This .......☺

    Hope it goes well and you have fun together xx

    1483746469
    AsYouWish! [sign in to see picture]
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    There was a recent forum about spanking and I thought one piece of advice was great. I can't remember who posted it but...

    Try getting a paddle each and chase each other around the bedroom trying to land some smacks on the bottom. There could be prizes for the winner. More spanks for example?

    1487436533
    delilahxx [sign in to see picture]
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    Thought I'd update this as we spent the last few days together.

    It wasn't awkward but we were both a little hesitant to start with.He he sat on the bed wearing jeans and t-shirt as I laid over his knees wearing this http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=36370

    He gave me a lovely red bum :)

    Later on we went out for dinner and drinks and when we got home we tried again. As we were both a little more uninhibited due to the alcohol it was a bit more relaxed.

    I asked him how he wanted me and he said on my hands and knees, so of course I obliged...

    I put my head on the mattress as we got into it, and he held my head down as he pulled my hair and spanked me lots...

    It was such a turn on! We had to do it twice!

    I got a lovely red and bruised bum, which looks great today, and he got a bruised hand.

    It was such a massive turn on, and seeing him so turned on by doing it really did it for me.

    Thanks for all the advice guys :)

    1487437981
    bondagegod [sign in to see picture]
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    Congratulations. I'm pleased it went well for you and was relaxed and didn't feel awkward for either of you.

    1487519702
    delilahxx [sign in to see picture]
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    bondagegod wrote:

    Congratulations. I'm pleased it went well for you and was relaxed and didn't feel awkward for either of you.

    Thank you. I feel much more confident now to have spanking just because I/we like it. Rather than in a sub/Dom or roleplay scenario :)

    1487520109
    Scorpius12 [sign in to see picture]
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    I'm so pleased it is working out so well for you D 😘 xx

    1487531725
    bondagegod [sign in to see picture]
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    That is good you feel more confident now and was a pleasureable experience that you enjoyed being spanked because you both like it just for pleasure purposes.

    1487542630
    smirnoff09 [sign in to see picture]
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    Hi
    It is great you are talking about things and exploring new things together.
    When I met my husband I was very vanilla and I really thought that was how I was but over the years and many discussions we have explored many new things including spanking. Which we thoroughly enjoy both in a Dom/sub situation or as foreplay.

    Wish you lots of fun as you grow in your relationship x

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