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  1. Help

    Pudgie [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant
    • Posts: 37
    • Joined: 2 May 2007

    I am after a little help i am a 31 year old female. I have been with my husband for 15 years and married for 9 years. we don't have a great sex life because i just cant climax and have an orgasm. its very rare that i do. we have tried everything and nothing seems to work. Ive just ordered my first vibrator today to see if that helps. but i am wondering if anyone has any advice? x

    mysteron [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 7354
    • Joined: 7 Jan 2014

    I am sure there are plenty of ways of enjoying sex without having to have the big O .It all depends on if you are happy to experiment and find alternative ways of doing things without necessarily having penatrative sex .

    sassykitten;) [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 1389
    • Joined: 28 May 2014

    Have u tried solo, through clit or penetrative foreplay if u can orgasm through clit vibs perhaps a vibrating cock rick would help???

    Purring-Pussy [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 3383
    • Joined: 11 Jun 2012

    I use to only be able to have clitoral orgasms. Then I tried experimenting with finding my G-spot, bot solo and with a partner. The Happy Rabbit 2 really helped and I can now have orgasms from penetration as well.

    It also doesn't help if you are worrying about it too much. Relax, experiment and enjoy x

    TB149 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 159
    • Joined: 6 Sep 2010

    Toys help a lot! There are some great toys out there and it's pretty rare we have sex without using one. They just make everything better!

    PetiteJess [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Colonel
    • Posts: 231
    • Joined: 2 Mar 2010

    Toys are great for helping you get to know your body. It sounds like you put a lot of pressure on yourself to climax, don't. It is difficult to climax when you add pressure to yourself to orgasm.
    Do you struggle to orgasm in general or just G-spot penetration? G-spot penetration is much more complicated to have an orgasm than clitoral.
    Just relax and have fun with your partner and new toy, dont pressure yourself or try and reach climax when having fun.

    Secretty [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
    • Posts: 113
    • Joined: 27 Mar 2015

    Some good advice already. Mine would be, although toys are good, make sure to keep your OH involved to stop him feeling left out. Try a vibrating cock ring or something similar as it will allow clitoral stimulation and penetration at the same time. Use the vibrator you got to work out whether you prefer clitoral or g-spot stimulation and buy some toys to help give you that stimulation while your OH penetrates you.

    My OH loves her clitoral stimulation. :P If I wear a vibrating cock ring, it sends her wild. It's all about getting to know your body and helping your OH touch you in the right places.

    But my biggest advice is DON'T PANIC about it. A suprising amount of women can't have proper orgasms, but most of them enjoy a healthy and satisfying sex life. Work out what works for you and your OH. As long as you both enjoy it, it doesn't matter if either of you climax.

    happyvibes [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major
    • Posts: 39
    • Joined: 26 Apr 2015

    It does sound like you could both be putting a lot of pressure on you for you to reach the big O. I'd recommend having some quality alone time, glass of wine to help you relax, some good erotica to get you in the mood and then get playing with your new toy. Explore yourself and see what feels good. Enjoy yourself and don't worry about whether you cum or not. I don't mean to exclude your husband in this, but maybe with the pressure off a bit then things will happen. Then you can show him what you've learned about your own body - what feels really good even if it doesn't make you cum at this stage. Get him to touch himself infront of you whilst you show him what feels good to you - free porn for both of you and helps if you're both doing it so you don't just feel like he's watching and waiting for you to cum.

    Have fun, and good luck!

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