• Roses are Red. Violets are Blue, we want to know more from you... COMPETITION!

    1486774157
    zombifiedguy [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
    • Posts: 50
    • Joined: 4 May 2015

    1.
    The cuffs are black
    Your corset is red
    Fuck the poem
    Now get on the bed.

    2.
    My kinks are many
    Chains and locks jingle
    Problem is
    Im fucking single!!! No need to sit and ask the whys Theres toys for singles And lovehoney supplies :)

    Not my best but i'll work on it lol

    1486776619
    zombifiedguy [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
    • Posts: 50
    • Joined: 4 May 2015

    1.
    For valentines day,
    Shop at lovehoney,
    Find the perfect gift,
    For your cuddle bunny.


    2.
    My kinks are many,
    Chains and locks jingle,
    Problem is,
    Im fucking single!!!
    No need to sit and ask the whys,
    Theres toys for singles,
    And lovehoney supplies :)

    (had to repost after editting went squiffy)

    1486789980
    4Uonly [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major
    • Posts: 106
    • Joined: 11 Nov 2016

    *AdamKR* wrote:

    Roses are red,
    And cost lots of money!
    Instead i bought you some sex toys,
    Compliments of Lovehoney! ;-)

    +1...Lol. You have just make my day.
    1486791662
    Devoted Husband [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major
    • Posts: 69
    • Joined: 8 Jul 2016

    Be my Valentine,

    I give you this gift,
    It is something as sweet as you.
    Open the draw and see what is inside.

    Later in the night,
    When your heart desires something more,
    Flip the lid and see what lovehoney has hidden.

    Love your admirer.

    1486792344
    Tiger Dick [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 1169
    • Joined: 9 Nov 2016

    For my lack of a big wedge of money

    I dream for my wish list at Lovehoney

    Without wanting to whine

    I'm all alone this valentine

    Sharing a salad with our G spot Bunny

    1486792537
    4Uonly [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major
    • Posts: 106
    • Joined: 11 Nov 2016

    Making life happier for others;
    Making life happier for yourself;
    Happy people happy Lovehoney.

    1486793676
    4Uonly [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major
    • Posts: 106
    • Joined: 11 Nov 2016

    My 2nd (if allowed).

    Let my love speaks happiness;
    Let me love receives happiness;
    Only Lovehoney give you true happiness.

    1486800275
    Trev27 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Officer Cadet
    • Posts: 1
    • Joined: 11 Feb 2017

    Your still the one by Shania Twain sing to my wife all the time who love like the day we 1st got together

    1486806156
    zombifiedguy [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
    • Posts: 50
    • Joined: 4 May 2015

    I love you today
    I'll love you forever,
    Lovehoney toys,
    For fun times together.

    Lets have so much fun,
    You know what they say,
    Show someone you love them,
    This valentines day.

    1486813903
    Tallish Darkish & Average [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1703
    • Joined: 24 Oct 2012

    A questionable addition to the comp.

    Roses are red:

    Roses are red.
    It's leaves, they are green.
    Open your legs.
    And I'll fill you with cream.

    Roses are red.
    Their leaves, green as grasses.
    Here's two Lovehoney paddles.
    To spank both our asses!

    Our asses are red.
    This parcel's wrapped blue.
    More Lovehoney gifts.
    This V-day for you.

    Roses are red.
    Sometimes they're yellow.
    I'm happy you're mine.
    I'm such a lucky fellow.

    Roses are red.
    Some roses are pink.
    The Lovehoney purple.
    Oft' satisfys our kink.

    Roses are red.
    Roses are white.
    I'm anticipating
    A quite wonderful night.

    Roses are red.
    All around you is black.
    As you're tied up, blindfolded.
    Awaiting a thwack!

    Roses are romantic.
    They can make someone's day.
    I'm surprised Lovehoney don't yet do a bunch.
    In Fifty Shades of Grey!

    1486816165
    NewbieReview [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Captain
    • Posts: 11
    • Joined: 22 Mar 2015

    Poem 1 Roses are red

    the vibrator is ready

    And the condom is on now shut the fuck up and orgasm on !

    Poem 2

    Now love I'm not being funny but we have spend £60 on lovehoney, so spread your legs open and get your Clit out 

    1486816611
    NewbieReview [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Captain
    • Posts: 11
    • Joined: 22 Mar 2015

    First entry  made a 11.29 incorrect these are my poems

    Poem 1

    Roses are red the vibrator is ready

    And the condom is on now shut the fuck up and orgasim on !

    poem 2

    Now love, I'm not being funny but we spent £60 on love honey, now spread your legs and I'll show your the money

    1486818704
    The Real Mr Grey [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 145
    • Joined: 7 May 2015

    Valentines day is coming,
    Its time to order new toys,
    Start searching on Love Honey,
    I'm dreaming of all the joys,
    Shall we get a long one,
    Or just a little tease,
    Or some new restraints,
    To tie her wrists down by her knees,
    Some bottles of lovely new lube,
    A gag and flogger or two,
    Valentines day is coming,
    I think we will be too.

    1486821912
    Choconala [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Colonel
    • Posts: 389
    • Joined: 11 Feb 2012

    You don't need much money
    To shop at lovehoney
    With plenty options to choose
    From lingerie to lubes
    You can Treat yourself and your lover
    To a night of hubba hubba ;)
    So Valentines will be a breeze
    Whether you want classy or sleeze
    Get some items in your cart
    To give your loved one a racing heart!

    1486821920
    lmh95 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 3317
    • Joined: 6 Aug 2014

    Sung to the tune of:
    Can't take my eyes off of you - Frankie Valli

    Lovehoney is the best place it's true
    To make all of our Valentine's day dreams come true
    Their vast selection is such
    That I want to order so much
    The parcel will quickly arrive
    And our sex life will spark back alive
    Lovehoney is the best place it's true
    There's always something exciting and new

    With first class customer care
    There's nowhere else that can compare
    With live chat discreetly online you can speak
    To advice what's best to give your love life a tweak
    They know how nervous newbies can feel
    But they can reassure you it's really no big deal
    Lovehoney is the best place it's true
    To get a Valentine's gift or two

    I love you baby and we'll be up all night
    I need you baby to reach the highest heights
    I love you baby thrust in me and we'll play
    Oh pretty baby you'll tie me down all day
    Oh pretty baby now that I've bound you, stay
    And let me Lovehoney you baby,
    let me Lovehoney you

    Lovehoney is the best place it's true
    To make all of our Valentine's day dreams come true
    With floggers, pinwheels, feather ticklers and such
    I'll excitedly quiver from your touch
    Our bodies will truly feel alive
    When we experiment with a new toy or five
    Lovehoney is the best place it's true
    To find the perfect Valentine's gift for you

    I'd love you baby to tie my corset tight
    I need you baby to try some of Lovehoney's sweet delight
    I love you baby trust in me with some blindfold play
    Oh pretty baby we'll try warm oil or ice cubes today
    Oh pretty baby you'll feel it really good, okay?
    So let me Lovehoney you baby, let me Lovehoney you.


    Great competition Leanne. Good luck everyone x

    1486823753
    smirnoff09 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
    • Posts: 623
    • Joined: 22 Apr 2010

    Love is in the air

    Over here and over there

    Valentines but once a year

    Everyone get into gear

    Happy bunnies we all will be

    Once between the sheets are we

    New pleasures to find

    Erotic fantasies Bind

    Yes¡YesYessssssss!!!!!

    1486828614
    rumbled [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Colonel
    • Posts: 18
    • Joined: 16 Dec 2013

    Valentines upon us

    Oh what do we wear

    Red crotchless panties

    Or no underwear

    The honeys sites open

    Search and dare

    Strap on a dildo

    Now Husband beware

    I'm taking control

    You listen to me

    strapped to the bed

    Look at kinky me!

    Thanks to love honey

    For corsets and playwear

    1486829282
    lovingnewtoys [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 4321
    • Joined: 16 Jan 2016

    @LUC - I am guessing things are really looking more rosy for you both - for that I make you both winners xxxx

    1486829850
    lmh95 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 3317
    • Joined: 6 Aug 2014

    lovingnewtoys wrote:

    @LUC - I am guessing things are really looking more rosy for you both - for that I make you both winners xxxx

    +1. Hope you have a great Valentine's day together :)
    1486830426
    lmh95 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 3317
    • Joined: 6 Aug 2014

    lmh95 wrote:

    Sung to the tune of:
    Can't take my eyes off of you - Frankie Valli

    Lovehoney is the best place it's true
    To make all of our Valentine's day fantasies come true
    Their vast selection is such
    That I want to order so much
    The parcel will quickly arrive
    And our sex life will spark back alive
    Lovehoney is the best place it's true
    There's always something exciting and new

    With first class customer care
    There's nowhere else that can compare
    With live chat discreetly online you can speak
    To advise what's best to give your love life a tweak
    They know how nervous newbies can feel
    But they can reassure you it's really no big deal
    Lovehoney is the best place it's true
    To get a Valentine's gift or two

    I love you baby and we'll be up all night
    I need you baby to reach the highest height
    I love you baby thrust in me and we'll play
    Oh pretty baby you'll tie me down all day
    Oh pretty baby now that you've bound me, stay
    And let me Lovehoney you baby,
    let me Lovehoney you

    Lovehoney is the best place it's true
    To make all of our Valentine's day fantasies come true
    With floggers, pinwheels, feather ticklers and such
    I'll excitedly quiver from your touch
    Our bodies will truly feel alive
    When we experiment with a brand new toy or five
    Lovehoney is the best place it's true
    To find the perfect Valentine's gift for you

    I'd love you baby to tie my corset tight
    I need you baby to try some of Lovehoney's sweet delight
    I love you baby trust in me with some blindfold play
    Oh pretty baby we'll try warm oil or ice cubes today
    Oh pretty baby you'll feel it really good, okay?
    So let me Lovehoney you baby, let me Lovehoney you.


    Great competition Leanne. Good luck everyone x

    Hope it's okay to do so but I've ammended my spelling mistakes and changed my entry a little. I've just had a chance to read through all the ones that I hadn't read already and I noticed one of my lines is very similar to someone else's post. Sorry, totally unintentional, so I've changed mine slightly. Well done everyone. Some really clever posts so far!! Delboy1991. That post is hot, hot, hot! You'd be great as an erotic fiction writer x

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