• Forum Review Competition...

    1483960091
    Clockwork_Oasis [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
    • Posts: 276
    • Joined: 9 Jun 2013

    Lovehoney - Leanne wrote:

    I will be accepting until Midday today

    Oh, hurray!!! I didn't think I'd make it, but I'll get on it right away!

    1483960876
    Sum Sub [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 4030
    • Joined: 4 Dec 2012

    I wrote something. It was like 800 words so i edited it, now almost 400 words, hope that still counts as short! Anyway, sent it in.

    1483963216
    Lovehoney - Leanne [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1974
    • Joined: 9 Oct 2014

    Oh wow this is going to be hard to pick just two , I wish I had more to give out! 

    Fantastic enteries. There is still time for mroe too yes

    1483966196
    bondagegod [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 7256
    • Joined: 2 Feb 2015

    Submitted one final entry. Good luck all who have entered.

    1483968121
    Lorah13 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 603
    • Joined: 8 Jun 2013

    I'm excited to read the winning entries if the winners are happy for them to be posted :) Good luck to everyone who entered.

    1483970202
    Sum Sub [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 4030
    • Joined: 4 Dec 2012

    Win or Lose, I'm happy to share mine

    1483973068
    Lovehoney - Leanne [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1974
    • Joined: 9 Oct 2014

    So we have Winner Number one

    Clockwork_Oasis

    This is their entry that they have been happy to share with you all: 

    "Hunting the big O: a beginner's guide


    The big O is a secretive and mysterious creature, and hunting it is one of the most enjoyable sports known to man. Hundreds of millions of men and women, worldwide, take part on a regular basis. The activity is 100% vegan friendly, and no one needs to get hurt unless they want to. 

    Here are the basics you need to know if you want to start chasing your own O, but remember: the most important thing is to have fun! 

    1. Everyone's O is different

    The big O lives somewhere deep inside you, and can only be lured out by its own preferred combination of sensations. Some are best lured by soft vibrations and gentle tickles, others go crazy for suction or sweet paint. Experiment! You will quickly become the expert on your personal big O, and as you get to know it, it will get easier and easier to make it appear. 

    2. Use the right equipment! 
    Although some big Os can be wrestled down by hand, there is a whole arsenal of creative weapons and tools to chose from - all designed to make the hunt easier and more precise. You can start small with a few simple basics and work your way up to a full tool's chest as you figure out what your big O's personality is. 


    Here, Lovehoney is your best friend. In my opinion, no other equipment store has such a good understanding of the fickle nature of the big O and the number of variations in their preferences. Is your big O most attracted to outside or inside stimulation? Feather-light touch or stinging slaps? It doesn't matter! Lovehoney has what you need, and the customer service advisers are happy to point you in the right direction. In the beginning, it might be hard to know exactly what your O needs, but Lovehoney's return policy makes it risk-free to try out a few different options. 

    3. Talk to seasoned veterans! 
    Having problems? Experiencing unexpected challenges, or can't find thre right tool to help you? Talk to old hunters with years of experience. The Lovehoney forum has thousands of experienced hunters who aren't precious about their secrets, and always welcome newbies with friendly advice and support. Don't be shy about asking questions or airing frustrations; someone will have been there before you, no matter how particular your O's needs are. 

    4. Don't give up, and enjoy the small Os you find along the way! 
    It might, at times, seem hopeless. You may explore the lady garden from corner to corner, consult every expert in the book, try every tool and weapon at your disposal - and still only lure out a few thumb-sized Os from the bush. Don't worry! The big one is in there somewhere, and when you wring your first big O to the ground, and lie there victorious - gasping for breath - you'll know it was worth it. And most of us, when our appetite for the big one is satiated, start enjoying the hunt for the smaller ones just as much. 



    Good luck, my friend, and raise a glass in the classic toast: to the hunt!"
    I will let you have aread through this one and congratulate Clockwork_Oasis before the announcement of winner number 2!
    Also I couldn't just leave it at 2 I have a couple of Runners up to announce too... 

    1483973509
    Sum Sub [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 4030
    • Joined: 4 Dec 2012

    brilliant piece Clockwork Oasis!

    1483973779
    Colonel Lube [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 214
    • Joined: 6 Oct 2005

    Very impressive entry. Like it.

    1483974593
    NatandTom [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 6092
    • Joined: 6 Jun 2015

    Congrats! Great piece :)

    1483974768
    wildflower [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 4262
    • Joined: 17 Jul 2013

    Absolutely brilliant , well done Clockwork Oasis !

    1483974959
    Lovehoney - Leanne [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1974
    • Joined: 9 Oct 2014

    Winner number two we have Sum Sub with entry :

    "It was a gloomy and damp night in December 2012, the light from my internet browser shone brightly in my face, the rest of the room dark and cold.

    On the screen before me, a butt plug on the Lovehoney site.  ADD TO BASKET The screen screamed out into the dark.  The cursor made its way slowly across the screen, a loud click broke through the silence.  Then, onto bondage tape.  Again, another loud click.  CHECKOUT the screen proclaimed, I clicked…

    And so it was I became acquainted with Lovehoney.co.uk

    It would be awhile before I visited again, but visit I did, and the forums this time I found.  Watching and lurking, reading about anal, oral and even floral.  The hours built up and eventually I bit the bullet and wrote on a thread.  Suicide Girl Photoshoot was the topic.  My comment?  That I like the juxtaposition of ultra-minimalism against the strong colours of suicide girl fashion. 

    The next to comment was Lovehoney – Jess, her thoughts well-informed and helpful, as I have learned has become the norm.

    With the ice broken, the foot in the door, the forum sucked me in.  The threads were plenty, Good morning, afternoon & evening went from no 2, to no 3 and ballooned to no 20 in no time at all; the banter friendly, helpful and lighthearted. 

    Get up in the morning.  Check lovehoney.

    On the bus to work. Check lovehoney.

    Mid-morning lull lovehoney Lunchbreak lovehoney, lovehoney lovehoney lovehoney. 

    Threads on toys, threads on life, threads on games, threads on threads; and when it goes quiet, there’s always that reassuring ADD TO BASKET to go and find.  When you come back from your trip to the shop, the community is there waiting - unassuming, supportive, accepting and immensely knowledgeable.

    And the boxes, they keep on arriving; dildos, vibrators, butt plugs, bondage kit, lingerie, lube, even naughty sweets, the reviews keep on building, smashing 100 and onwards, upwards.  Review of the month, testers, gifting.

    So now, on a damp and gloomy January in 2017, my face again lit by the light from an internet browser, I look back over the past 49 months.  A lot has happened, happy and sad, gain and loss, and I’ve changed, changed a lot and lovehoney too has changed.  But still that community is there, and has been there for me, accepting, advising and assisting all that ask, without judgement and with love and care. 

    Thankyou Lovehoney."

    Look out for some Runners up . That is luxury sets spoken for now though. 

    I have to say we have had some fantastic enteries and thank you all for taking part! 

    1483975031
    lovingnewtoys [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 4369
    • Joined: 16 Jan 2016

    Sum Sub wrote:

    Win or Lose, I'm happy to share mine

    Me too!!! Congrats first winner - excellent piece xxx
    1483975239
    lovingnewtoys [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 4369
    • Joined: 16 Jan 2016

    And you too sum sub xxx

    1483975373
    wildflower [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 4262
    • Joined: 17 Jul 2013

    Many congrats Sum Sub , a fab summary of what Lovehoney means to lots of us :)

    1483975562
    Clockwork_Oasis [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
    • Posts: 276
    • Joined: 9 Jun 2013

    Hurray Hurray!!! Thank you so much everyone ^^ <3

    1483975600
    Lorah13 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 603
    • Joined: 8 Jun 2013

    Congrats to the winners, both excellent reads :)

    1483975646
    Clockwork_Oasis [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
    • Posts: 276
    • Joined: 9 Jun 2013

    Congratulations Sum Sub! What a lovely entry, made me happy to read it. Felt very true to the feeling of the community <3

    1483975683
    HappyHusband79 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 24
    • Joined: 11 Feb 2010

    Congratulations both excellent writing

    1483975976
    Lovehoney - Leanne [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1974
    • Joined: 9 Oct 2014

    I am pleased to announce Runner up Number one:

    ThrowMeToTheLesbians:

    "It had been a long day as you shut the front door behind you, sigh and toe off your shoes, dumping your keys with a clink into the aptly placed bowl in the entranceway. You groan as you flex your toes, feeling the muscles relax after being on your feet nearly all day.

    You sigh again and look at the clock as you enter the kitchen. It’s late so leftovers for dinner it is. You pull out the refrigerated Tupperware, get a fork from the drawer and bump it closed with your hip, snagging a can of your favourite drink as you close the fridge door.

    You bypass the lounge and head directly upstairs, turning off the lights as you go, and flop down onto the bed with a bounce. It doesn’t take long for the day to catch up with your brain and you’re soon full from the leftovers, eyes heavy with sleep. You’re still a little tense though. If only there were some way to fully relax before trying to rest.

    You roll over on the bed and your eyes land on the plain brown box you received in the post a month ago. You bite your cheek absently as you think. ‘No one’s going to know if I try it, are they?’ ‘No one’s going to look at me differently if I do it in the privacy of my own home.’ ‘If I don’t like it I can just stop.’ ‘I’ll never know if I don’t try.’

    You grunt with the effort of leaning over to snag the box without fully leaving the bed and flop back down with a triumphant huff. You open the box and set out your purchases, wondering where you got the courage to buy this stuff in the first place. It’s not much, just lube, cleaning wipes, a storage bag, and… that.

    You take it out of the sleek packaging and hold it up in the dim lamplight. For such a small silicone object it sure does give an impression. It’s beautifully crafted. Sleek and a lovely deep colour that had you mesmerised from first glance on the webpage. You run your fingers over the end of it, imagining it in use and you feel the first tingle of arousal. It’s been far too long since you indulged in carnal pleasure. Certainly far too long since you’ve ever thought about experimenting. With renewed determination you set out to change that.

    The lube is simple, plain and highly recommended. It also makes it so easy to get your toy in the right place. And boy is it in the right place. You’ve never felt anything like this before. Your fingers ache from the relentless pumping and thrusting, your skin is flushed with a slight sheen, your thigh and stomach muscles ache from the involuntary clenching. It’s so good you don’t want it to stop.

    You don’t know how many times you’ve orgasmed, or how hoarse your moans actually sound, but you know you have one more in you. Just... one... more… yes! You cover your face with an arm instinctively and start laughing, the bed shaking with it. How long have you put off using this? How long have you denied yourself this ecstasy?

    You fall asleep with only a perfunctory swipe of cleaning wipes, face slack and happy. It’s the best sleep you’ve had in years.

    The next morning is the start of the weekend and you immediately indulge in a hot soak in the tub, scrubbing your skin pink and letting the water soothe your tight muscles. You dry and dress in your comfortable lounge clothes and plod downstairs for coffee and breakfast. You eat and drink at your desk, browsing the website that awakened something inside you, something hungry and confident, something sexy.

    You leave your first review after your third order, singing the praises of this wonderful new toy that had your legs shaking.

    You experience your first example of customer service when a toy just stops working, and are pleasantly surprised to have it replaced with no questions asked, no fuss and no quibbles.

    You have your first anniversary. Others have come and gone in your life, you’ve a new job, a new pet and a new laptop; the first bookmark, naturally, being for your favourite website.

    It’s at this time, when you noticed the date is 365 days after your first order, that this is one of the shortest but one of the most meaningful relationships you’ve ever had. It’s one that has helped you discover things about yourself, your tastes and desires. It’s one that has helped you grow as a person, to not think others are wrong or weird for different inclinations. It’s one that has changed your view for the better and has never led you wrong, even when things didn’t turn out the way you wanted they let you try again. It’s the one that made you realise it’s okay to be different, to be soft where others would be hard, to be Dominant where others would be submissive, to be colourful where others would be plain. It’s the one that’s made it okay to be yourself, and be loved for it.

    You sit back and watch the sun set on the anniversary of your most beneficial relationship to date; the relationship you discovered between yourself and Lovehoney.

    Fin."

    As I said I only had two luxury sets to giveaway so a small bundle is on it's way to this Runner up. 

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