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  1. Personal messages.. (inbox)

    1490350722
    Lovehoney - Leanne [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2417
    • Joined: 9 Oct 2014

    Sorry come in to be a party pooper... Again! 

    Ok so personal messaging  is not a thing and will not be in the future, explinations have been given as to why. Same for the sharing of personal information (email addresses, twitter etc) 

    I must also add that I am not a messenger, I am a moderator and review coordinator. I have in the past been happy to reach out to members in extreme circumstances, for example Health related issues and If there is an extreme circumstance in future I will be happy to help. 

    However I will not reach out to allow members to have a one on one discussion through me so they can simply have private chat. Please do not use the community email address to 'reach out' to indervidual members for such chat. I simply do not have the time and completely defeats the object of the forum! 

    Please do not 'try to find ways' to include a one on one chat function. The forum is open to all and it will stay that way.

    Many members get to know each other just fine using the forum and sticking to the rules. 

    Thank you 

    1490351868
    Terri JJ [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 12520
    • Joined: 20 Aug 2014

    Lovehoney - Leanne wrote:

    Sorry come in to be a party pooper... Again!

    Ok so personal messaging is not a thing and will not be in the future, explinations have been given as to why. Same for the sharing of personal information (email addresses, twitter etc)

    I must also add that I am not a messenger, I am a moderator and review coordinator. I have in the past been happy to reach out to members in extreme circumstances, for example Health related issues and If there is an extreme circumstance in future I will be happy to help.

    However I will not reach out to allow members to have a one on one discussion through me so they can simply have private chat. Please do not use the community email address to 'reach out' to indervidual members for such chat. I simply do not have the time and completely defeats the object of the forum!

    Please do not 'try to find ways' to include a one on one chat function. The forum is open to all and it will stay that way.

    Many members get to know each other just fine using the forum and sticking to the rules.

    Thank you

    You are in no way a party pooper.....you're just doing your job...keeping everything safe and functioning as it should. I cant believe that people have been using the community email to try to contact others !

    Why cant people just read the rules !!

    1490352220
    Yummymummy :-* [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 403
    • Joined: 22 Dec 2015

    Leanne's Secret Squirrel Messenger Service...erm no.

    🤔

    1490375416
    lovingnewtoys [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 5309
    • Joined: 16 Jan 2016

    Terri JJ wrote:

    Lovehoney - Leanne wrote:

    Sorry come in to be a party pooper... Again!

    Ok so personal messaging is not a thing and will not be in the future, explinations have been given as to why. Same for the sharing of personal information (email addresses, twitter etc)

    I must also add that I am not a messenger, I am a moderator and review coordinator. I have in the past been happy to reach out to members in extreme circumstances, for example Health related issues and If there is an extreme circumstance in future I will be happy to help.

    However I will not reach out to allow members to have a one on one discussion through me so they can simply have private chat. Please do not use the community email address to 'reach out' to indervidual members for such chat. I simply do not have the time and completely defeats the object of the forum!

    Please do not 'try to find ways' to include a one on one chat function. The forum is open to all and it will stay that way.

    Many members get to know each other just fine using the forum and sticking to the rules.

    Thank you

    You are in no way a party pooper.....you're just doing your job...keeping everything safe and functioning as it should. I cant believe that people have been using the community email to try to contact others !

    Why cant people just read the rules !!

    +1 - seriously!!!!

    1490485067
    Richie1 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
    • Posts: 269
    • Joined: 10 Feb 2016

    lovingnewtoys wrote:

    Terri JJ wrote:

    Lovehoney - Leanne wrote:

    Sorry come in to be a party pooper... Again!

    Ok so personal messaging is not a thing and will not be in the future, explinations have been given as to why. Same for the sharing of personal information (email addresses, twitter etc)

    I must also add that I am not a messenger, I am a moderator and review coordinator. I have in the past been happy to reach out to members in extreme circumstances, for example Health related issues and If there is an extreme circumstance in future I will be happy to help.

    However I will not reach out to allow members to have a one on one discussion through me so they can simply have private chat. Please do not use the community email address to 'reach out' to indervidual members for such chat. I simply do not have the time and completely defeats the object of the forum!

    Please do not 'try to find ways' to include a one on one chat function. The forum is open to all and it will stay that way.

    Many members get to know each other just fine using the forum and sticking to the rules.

    Thank you

    You are in no way a party pooper.....you're just doing your job...keeping everything safe and functioning as it should. I cant believe that people have been using the community email to try to contact others !

    Why cant people just read the rules !!

    +1 - seriously!!!!

    Surely the Lovehoney rules are absolutely clear. it is a shame that whether it be bad photos or attempts to have one on one private chats, the moderators are constantly having to remind people that these things are unacceptable.

    The forums are safe thanks to the hard work and diligence of the Moderators, long may that continue to be the case....Thank you Leanne. xx

    1509712740
    Michael777 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major
    • Posts: 201
    • Joined: 1 Oct 2017

    If there was a facility to block users if the messages aren't wanted then surely that would help keep the unwelcome messages, apart from the first one obviously. Maybe there could be an option for each user whether they receive private messages or not so only people who want pms can receive them.
    It's difficult sometimes for a topic not to turn in to one to ones without the facility.

    1509713211
    Lovehoney - Leanne [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2417
    • Joined: 9 Oct 2014

    Michael777 wrote:

    If there was a facility to block users if the messages aren't wanted then surely that would help keep the unwelcome messages, apart from the first one obviously. Maybe there could be an option for each user whether they receive private messages or not so only people who want pms can receive them.
    It's difficult sometimes for a topic not to turn in to one to ones without the facility.

    Hi Michael,

    Thanks for the suggestion but... 

    The chat function will not be returning under no circumstances. It is not just for member's safety it is also for moderation reasons. 

    It has not been difficult for many members to talk in this open forum within the rules so I don't see being an issue. 

    This thread has answered many a question/suggestion and here is something posted on page2: 

    Lovehoney - Leanne wrote:

    PM/DM , Twitter , Facebook ... basically anyway that means there is no longer open discussions will not be coming back. 

    There are a number of reasons and I for one and happy that this is the way it is. 

    Sorry guys but if you feel you can't say it openly and for all to join in then this is not the place to say it. 

    heart

    Hope this helps clarify 

    1509715115
    LIL_KNOWN69 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 965
    • Joined: 9 Oct 2005

    Also just want to add that when a chat function was added back in the day, it was a nightmare for people getting harassed. A lot of people assumed they could come here and use it as some form of seedy dating service which was kinda frustrating when your trying to help others.

    1509717698
    Lovehoney - Jess Wilde [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2239
    • Joined: 30 Nov 2012

    LIL_KNOWN69 wrote:

    Also just want to add that when a chat function was added back in the day, it was a nightmare for people getting harassed. A lot of people assumed they could come here and use it as some form of seedy dating service which was kinda frustrating when your trying to help others.

    ^^ Exactly. 

    This actually STILL happens now, even without the chat function. Lots of people still join the forum thinking its a hookup / flirting / dating site. Not to mention the amount of issues we have with forum members falling out with one another on social media platforms and then reporting those issues to us here (hence why we removed social media sharing privileges). 

    I'd hate to think out of hand it could get if we provided a non-moderatable function. 

    1509718499
    LIL_KNOWN69 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 965
    • Joined: 9 Oct 2005

    Agreed with everything above, It’s a contained environment and it’s good that it’s all pretty anonymous and saves anyone getting harassed on their personal sites. For instance, I’m a manager in an IT company with around 15-20 people in my team, I don’t exactly need or want any of them finding me here.

    I would love to have a meetup with members of the team to put some faces to names, but anything in this particular environment requires a lot of protective procedures as unfortunately some people can’t understand we’re not all sex fiends.

    1509719589
    Michael777 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major
    • Posts: 201
    • Joined: 1 Oct 2017

    I totally understand and agree in principle with everyone"a concerns for this I've been on other sites and had to block people who have become obnoxious.
    It's just a shame there's no means to very occasionally take a chat off line, so to speak. But if the thought of this offends certain people, then I can see that without regulations or personal options it's a no go!

    1510007068
    Saucy Sarah [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant
    • Posts: 40
    • Joined: 22 Oct 2017

    Hi

    it sounds like a safer option can I ask the purpose of having friends on here if you can't actually message them just wondered what it was for ?

    1510010576
    AsYouWish! [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1645
    • Joined: 9 Oct 2012

    A warm cosy feeling inside, that's all.

    1510038741
    NatandTom [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 6745
    • Joined: 6 Jun 2015

    Saucy Sarah, we use the friend function so we can easily find the profiles of those who post reviews that we find helpful etc :)

    1510048798
    ToGildALily [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major
    • Posts: 162
    • Joined: 24 May 2016

    I like that we have no PM facility. It is bad enough doing internet dating to get your assortment of creeps there let alone on a site which primarily concerns sex. I wouldn't put a picture of myself on my profile in a LH product if I knew I'd get hassle for one thing. I come here to sometimes chat, ask questions or get advice. It is nice there is that judgement and bother free space here and to me it matches the spirit of the site in making sex less of the shameful and dirty thing people still view it as.

    1510178450
    Saucy Sarah [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant
    • Posts: 40
    • Joined: 22 Oct 2017

    Thanks for the explaination Nat and Tom

    1510259387
    JessicaRabbit34D [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Captain
    • Posts: 29
    • Joined: 27 Nov 2016

    Hello,

    Going off topic on this but is there a way to change profile name as i dont like the 1 i got!

    Shame no Inbox services also it is a safer way to not have it aswell!

    Thanks x

    1510328080
    KinkyMinxMoo [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 3390
    • Joined: 20 Nov 2013

    JessicaRabbit34D wrote:

    Hello,

    Going off topic on this but is there a way to change profile name as i dont like the 1 i got

    Thanks x

    In case no one sees your comment, I have copied this from a different thread; it is the response from someone asking the same thing.

    Lovehoney - Leanne wrote:

    We don't really do that, sorry.

    We only ever change names in extreme situations.

    It does state at the time of making the username it cannot be changed. It causes issues for us, especially for active members if we do and is not as simple as people may think.

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