Sometimes when you’re dating, there’s nothing worse than that, “What are we?” stage.
You find yourself thinking, “Are we dating? Are we seeing each other? Are we official?” and it can be a tough case to crack. Labelling your new relationship is something we all want (or need) to do but it comes as no surprise that a lot of the time, we don’t really know what we should be calling it.
Not only do we have that ever-so-helpful voice inside our heads telling us to get a wriggle on with it, we’re in the Facebook age now where the seriousness of our relationships is determined by the status we set on our social media profile.
However, if you’re not really sure what label you should be giving your new relationship in 2018, have a think about the stage you’re at first and take it from there. At first, it might seem clear as mud but once you’ve given it some thought, you’ll have it sussed.
Here are some helpful hints…
Lots of you wanted to know what the relationship between a Dominant and a submissive partner is really like, so we reached out to sex blogger and queen of kink, Cara Sutra, to tell us more.
The world of Dominance and submission holds a dark allure while remaining an enigmatic mystery to many. How does a Dom/sub relationship work? Can you just dip your toes into kink or do you have to become a permanent member of the BDSM scene?
Couples often experience surprising benefits to their relationship when sampling the world of Dominance and submission, and it’s not all kinky spankings and bondage cuffs. Full surrender of control, and acceptance of that control, can be a defining bonding experience for your relationship.
Exploring new kinky adventures together will be a sexy shared secret. Plus, the mutual trust required for such intensely erotic play may lead to a stronger attraction to your partner than ever before.
There's no need to feel daunted by the thought of trying out a Dom/sub relationship. Discover the beauty of a relationship which thrives on an exchange of power between partners.
If you're heading off to university for the first time this autumn, what should you know about uni sex? Florence and Reed from ComeCurious share their advice on the things they wish they'd known about intimacy at uni.
Sex at university can be fun, but it can also be awkward, confusing and uncomfortable. It’s hard to know exactly what to do when sex education at school left blanks on particular areas (essentially, everything fun).
We all have a lot of questions when it comes to sex: will it hurt the first time? Is it normal to masturbate? How do I perform well?
And it’s a hard topic to bring up with friends and family. Most of the time we learn the hard way, after awkward one night stands and experiments gone wrong. Although it’s great to learn from our experiences, it’s also great to go into these new situations having some good information.
Luckily, there are places where you can learn more, such as our YouTube channel ComeCurious and Lovehoney’s e-book UNISEX. Both are filled with tons of useful advice to make your university encounters are easier, more comfortable and most important of all, more pleasurable.
In this Head Board article, we’re getting to the – ahem – bottom of the question, “If I’m a man who likes anal play, does that mean I’m gay?”.
Here to offer answers is award-winning journalist and sex educator Alix Fox, co-host of BBC Radio 1’s real-life comedy sex stories show, Unexpected Fluids, and resident X-rated agony aunt on The Modern Mann podcast.
Alix is also a proud Ambassador for young people’s sexual health charity Brook, so when it comes to bums, you know she’s not talking out of her arse.
OK, my Puzzled-About-Posterior-Play Posse, let’s have a conversation about anal stimulation! I’m going to break this question down into easily digestible parts. Starting with…
Polyamory – the desire, practice or acceptance of maintaining more than one intimate relationship concurrently with the full knowledge and consent of everyone involved – is coming more and more into mainstream consciousness. Sex blogger, sex educator and adult product reviewer Amy Norton weighs in on how to talk to your partner about an open relationship.
So you think you might want to be polyamorous, but you're already in an existing relationship?
The hard truth is that the transition from monogamy to non-monogamy is often difficult and requires a lot of work from everyone involved.
The good news is that, with communication, commitment, compassion and a hefty dose of patience, it's entirely doable! If you're reading this, I assume it's because you want to know how to broach this potentially fraught subject with your partner.
Recently, we were asked the question: "How does one begin to feel sex positive when sex has not always been a positive experience?". So we reached out to therapist and coach Esther De La Ford for her advice on how to rediscover your sexual happiness.
If I could give anyone who has experienced sexual trauma only 2 pieces of advice, it would be these.
- Let yourself completely off the hook. Ditch expectations. Be open to the high possibility of tears, breakdowns, and your body and brain just not playing ball sometimes. Then love yourself anyway.
- Throw everything you've got at it and see what sticks. Don't only try one mindfulness technique, or go to a few sessions at a Rape and Sexual Abuse Clinic you're not really into, or read the first 3 chapters of a tantra book a mate suggested and then forget about it. Try EVERYTHING. This is your life, your body, your sexual wellbeing. It deserves everything you've got.
These are the two pieces of advice I would give if we were meeting in a pub toilet and didn't have very long to chat, but thankfully we have a bit more time here.
So here are my top tips for cultivating a healthy space to start enjoying sex again after sexual trauma.
"My partner is a wheelchair user and doesn't find missionary very comfortable. Can you recommend any positions that we can try?"
Disability Awareness Consultant and founder of DisabilityAfterDark, Andrew Gurza, shares his top sex positions for wheelchair users.
Andrew here! I received an interesting question in The Lovehoney Head Board inbox recently that dealt with disability, and it is among a category of questions that disabled people are asked when it comes to their sex lives.
Aside from people wanting to know if we can even have sex at all (which, by the way, is super offensive and ableist), the next common question is “How do you have sex?”
Well, we received the question above from someone who wants to know what positions, other than missionary, would work best for their partner who is a wheelchair user, so keep reading for my recommendations.
How does being attracted to a trans or non-binary person affect your definition of your sexuality? Our Head Board guest author, trans woman and plus size model Shay Neary, is here to share her words of wisdom on trans attraction and sexuality.
Because of a fundamental lack of understanding of gender structure and identity, we're sometimes mystified by the matters of attraction - especially when it's in regard to TNBGF* individuals.
Part of the problem is that we tend to look at gender as if it were like a single pair of shoes, in which you have only left or right, and nothing in between.
But gender identity is more like the entire shoe deparment, with an enormous array of individual styles for you to choose from based on what you feel most comfortable in and what most suits your individual tastes.
So how do you navigate the world of dating a trans person?
"My girlfriend's really shy about her body. I love the way she looks, but is there any lingerie I can buy her to help her feel sexier?"
When we asked you to send us your sex questions, tons of you wanted to know how to help your partner feel more confident in their own skin. So we asked body-positive blogger and Instagram sensation,CurvyGirlThin (aka Charli) to give us her finest tips for lingerie to make anyone feel fab.
Feeling sexy is definitely linked to being empowered. If a woman doesn’t feel empowered, then she’s unlikely to feel confident and sexy in her own body.
For me, empowerment definitely starts at the base - and that is lingerie. However, my mood really affects what lingerie is going to make me feel my sexiest.
Read more below to see Charli's top lingerie tips and choices.
Lots of you asked us, what is it that makes a man phenomenal in bed? Luckily, our Head Board sexpert and award-winning relationships blogger, is here to offer his take on the number one sex tip for men.
Sex from a male perspective can often be more complicated than it really has to be. It's very easy to overthink sex, to over-analyse you partner's expectations and your own ability (or inability) to perform.
It's important to remember that sex should be enjoyable for all parties. It's one of life's simplest yet greatest pleasures, but still we insist on stressing out about it.
One of the biggest challenges for men is remembering that not all partners like the same thing; of course they don't! With one partner you may be a stud, and with another, you could be the greatest anti-climax the act of sex has ever known.
There is, however, one trick that I firmly believe should work with just about any partner – and it's all about the build-up.