Sex toys are emotionally charged gifts, conveying how intimately you know your lover’s tastes and desires, and thus sex toy gifts at Christmas can be a tricky business.
Get it right and you’ll be showered with praise, compassion, and most of all, sex, while a moment’s misjudgement can cause embarrassment or even offence.
Never ones to stand idly by while their fellow humans suffer solo, we’ve created this helpful quiz to help you come up trumps with the perfect toy for your lady.
Seven questions will expertly steer you through the choppy storms of confusion to the beachy inlet of understanding, with a perfect pleasure purchase revealed at the end.
There are eight products that could be potentially turned up by our diagnostic algorithm.
Each one is a top-ranking best-seller on the Lovehoney site, minimising the likelihood of a poor pick. Just make sure your lover doesn’t already have one and you’re a shoo-in.
Buying sexy underwear for your wife or girlfriend can seem like a totally daunting task. From bustiers, to basques, bras to bodystockings, it can be incredibly difficult to determine not only what your partner would like, but what would suit them, and what they would feel most comfortable wearing.
Luckily, we've created a simple and stress-free way to determine what kind of lingerie your lady woud love for this festive season: a quiz!
Containing seven questions (and not an algebraic formula in sight) that will determine your lover's likes and dislikes, this Christmas questionnaire will do all the hard work for you, and offer the perfect present from our lingerie collection based on your answers.
All you need to find out before you take the quiz is your partner's bra and dress size (which you can do by having a quick snoop at the labels in her underwear drawer), and pick one of the multiple choice answers for each question to reveal your sexy solution.
As you can probably imagine, working for an online sex toy retailer (and the biggest in the UK, I might add) comes with some pretty interesting job responsibilities.
Between practicing orgasm faces with colleagues, deciding whether something is actually NSFW for other workplaces and writing 'To Do' lists that would make even Masters & Johnson blush, we still have a little time left for other fun (totally work related) things.
You may have noticed that Bondage Boutique has recently undergone a makeover and is now speckled with lots of lovely new images and a pair of brand spanking new models - literally!
Most of the the time, when you see photos of bondage gear it's a shot of the product on its own, which can make it hard to visualise the kit actually being used.
Alternatively, when bondage product images involve a model, they very often end up super pornographic. *Sigh*
So we were given the challenge to re-shoot our top-selling Bondage Boutique products on models without making it look like Lovehoney were branching out into 'adult DVDs', and with nothing to go on except our own (brilliant!) ideas.
The shoot lasted 3 days and, as Lovehoney's resident bondage expert, I was on hand to make sure each product was photographed in its best light, accurately, and that the models felt comfortable and safe.
To give you a little insight into my job and the general goings on at LHHQ, I've compiled some of my favourite behind the scenes outtakes for you to enjoy…
Sex toy brand names are a broad-ranging bunch. For every Belladonna’s Bitch Fist or Anal Fantasy Ass-gasm, there is the milder Starlight Gems or Pearl Shine.
In fact, some feature terms so mild that many of your friends and co-workers could be repeatedly referencing sex toys without even knowing it. What a fan-flipping-tastic opportunity for a game of Sex Toy Bingo.
If you’re having a slow week at work, now’s your chance to pally up with a colleague for a head to head battle of the sexy-terms.
Alternatively, if you don't feel like risking your career and reputation you can also get your game on with a partner or housemate while watching the new series of The Apprentice.
Print out these two bingo sheets, pass one along to your friend, and prepare to listen like you’ve never listened before.
Ever wondered why you and your partner want sex at different times? It's not just them being awkward, it's biology.
According to our survey of 2,300 people, men and women's peak times for horniness occur 15 hours apart… Nightmare.
A whopping 78% of men and 69% of women admitted they desire sex most at different times of the day to their partner.
And what are these magical times that bring each of the sexes to life with lust? Well, if you're a man, it's all about the morning glory. Men prefer to wake and shake between 6am and 9am with 7.53am being the optimal time for horizontal refreshment. For women, it appears that nocturnal nooky is the favourite. The hours between 11pm and 2am are most popular for females with 11.21pm being the most moist minute.
I guess it's true what they say: men are from Mars and women are from Venus and the two planets appear to operate in different timezones.
It's not something you hear everyday, but felt craft just got a whole lot sexier.
Introducing Madame Roxy's Erotic Emporium - the Soho sex shop made entirely of felt - brought to you by artist Lucy Sparrow.
The art installation, which will be open to the public until 17th October, took six months to create and every single sex toy, condom and bondage item on the shelves (around 5,000 in total) was stitched by Lucy's nimble fingers.
Queen of felt Lucy hopes that the erotic exhibit will challenge society's 'Victorian attitudes' towards sex, particularly the commercialisation of London's provocative Soho area.
She explained: "While London's Soho undergoes sterilisation with strip clubs and sex shops being swept away in favour of trendy wine bars and hipster coffee shops, so Britain's laws on pornography are also being cleansed."
See if you can spot some of your most-loved Lovehoney products in the snaps below.
SPOILER ALERT: Do not read this if you haven't seen episode four of Humans.
If you were one of the five million people who saw that sex scene on Channel 4's Humans a few weeks ago, then you'll have no trouble imagining a human having sex with a robot. The scene caused a lot of stir on the internet and for many, it all seemed a bit too close for comfort.
Bumping uglies with synthetic humans is no new phenomenon, with thousands of sex dolls on the market offering varying levels of authenticity. They're closer to the physical experience of having sex than handheld masturbators or sex toys and are something that many people are keen to 'explore'.
Those lucky enough to own a high-end doll, such as a Teddy Babe, may even find that they are much more than a means for sexual fulfilment. For many, these dolls evolve into so much more than a large male masturbator - offering companionship, passion and in some cases, romance.
While many of us love driving, comparatively fewer choose to actively pleasure ourselves in the driver's seat, as attested by the UK's poor sales figures of automatic cars.
Recently, however, a lady in her thirties - identified only as "pretty fit" by the Daily Mail's baroque-tongued source - found her way into print for just that after crashing her car into the back of a fish delivery van while using her vibrator in traffic.
Apparently overcome with amour as she sat at the wheel of her Mini Cooper, the frisky multitasker was spotted on camera swiftly buttoning up her trousers after the collision, and presumably hoping no one would try and shake hands.
In view of this, we felt that a quick recap of some 'when and where' sex toy dos and don'ts would be timely, helping to prevent more vibrator-related accidents and subsequent embarrassing stories in national newspapers.
Those of you that are really on the ball will know that we recently conducted a poll to find out whether the nation's penises have names (or not).
We had a staggering response and can now reveal that 60% of todgers were given names by their proud owners.
So now it's time for the girls! We want to know: Do your boobs have names too?
Whether you've named them, your partner has named them or they remain nameless, take the poll below.
If you're really in the sharing mood, write your boobies' names in the comment section for your chance to win a Tracey Cox Supersex Bullet Vibrator worth £12.99.
Don't worry, you can still enter even if you don't have boobs or if your boobs don't have a name. Just leave a comment.
The winner will be picked at random and notified by email on Monday 20th July.
Long Dong Silver, The Pleasure Pump or maybe even Thor. All guys have a name for their… little friend? Right?
It's okay guys, you can admit it. Even super-cool Channing Tatum owned up to calling his man-pole Gilbert this week.
So if you or your partner have ever had a pet name for your trouser snake, we want to know.
Take the poll and, if you feel like sharing, write your willy's name in the comment section below*.
We will pick a name at random to receive a Lovehoney Bionic Bullet Vibrating Cock Ring worth £14.99.
You owe it to your penis really.
*Dont worry, you can still enter even if you don't have a penis or if your penis doesn't have a name. Just leave a comment.
The winner will be notified by email on Friday 19th June.