Top 10 Sexy Secret Santa Gifts

Top 10 Sexy Secret Santa Gifts

by Lovehoney

on 9 Oct 2017

  • 10 Best Secret Santa Gifts
  • Take the stress out of Secret Santa shopping and put a smile on their face with a sexy novelty gift.

    A cheeky prezzie from Lovehoney means you can give the gift of (sexual) happiness!

    £5 and under

  • 2. Penis Pasta 200g

    Penis Pasta

    100% durum wheat pasta shaped like silly willies. They look small to start with, but cook them in boiling water and they grow enough to be completely filling.

    Definite growers, not showers!

    • Tasty plain pasta for jazzing up your favourite meals
    • Easy to cook (everyone knows how to cook pasta, right?)
    • A fun way to get extra (vitamin) D in your diet
    Ideal for:
    • The King or Queen of Take-Aways
    What they say:

    "Me and my partner like to just mix it in with normal pasta when guests come over and wait to see the look on their face when they realise there's lots of little penises in their pasta."

  • 3. Candy G-String

    Candy G-String

    Stop the fighting about where to go for dinner, and opt to eat in (or out) with this oh-so-sweet candy thong. Made from the same tasty candy as retro edible necklaces, these novelty knickers are ideal for adding some delicious fun to foreplay.

    • A fun throwback to candy necklaces, but for grown ups
    • One size fits most
    • Also available: candy posing pouch, bra, nipple tassles and cock ring
    Ideal for:
    • The One with the Sweet Tooth (and Dirty Mind)
    What they say:

    "The candy panties are the most amazing tasting, and they come with instructions and tips - oh so fun! My boyfriend had a blast with these, and it was fun for him to eat them off me. He says they're very tasty, he couldn't get enough of them"

  • 4. Fever Hold Ups

    Fever Hold Ups with Red Bow

    From bedroom to fancy dress party and everywhere in-between, enchant all you meet in Fever's sheer white hold up stockings. These Mrs Claus-esque classic white hold ups feature a thick thigh band and are finished with cute red bows.

    • Festively fun and perfect for xmas dress up
    • One size fits most
    • Under £5 and not edible
    Ideal for:
    • The Christmas-Obsessed Fancy-Dresser
    What they say:

    "Fit well, both on my long legs and the wife's shorter chunkier legs. Haven't tried these without suspenders, but they are quite stretchy, so don't know how well they would hold up."

  • £10 and under

  • 5. Bondage Boutique Red Furry Handcuffs

    Bondage Boutique Red Furry Handcuffs

    Fluffy on the outside, hardcore on the inside. Just like Chuck Norris' beard these furry cuffs pack a punch. Within the soft faux fur exterior is a set of lockable metal handcuffs for reliable restraint with a cosy embrace and, in red, they're oh-so festive!

    • Metal handcuffs with faux fur covering
    • Safety catch and 2 keys
    • 4 colours to choose from: red, pink, purple and black
    Ideal for:
    • The Quiet One
    What they say:

    "For the size and price these are little fluffy miracles. You must buy them! They instantly add that little something to bedroom activities and were a turn on straight away for me and the Mr."

  • 6. Lovehoney Oh! Kama Sutra Playing Cards

    Lovehoney Oh! Kama Sutra Playing Cards

    When you're playing with these carnal cards, you'll struggle to keep a poker face whatever hand you're dealt. Taking inspiration from the original Kama Sutra, each card features a different position for you to explore, ensuring everyone comes up trumps.

    • Full 52-card deck with 2 joker cards
    • Each card features a different Kama Sutra position
    • Great for better sex, hilarious card games and x-rated magic tricks
    Ideal for:
    • The Gamer
    • The Yoga Pro
    What they say:

    "I bought these and a cheeky little stocking filler at Christmas, and boy am I glad. My BF and I love to play rummy and we have just started using these instead of the other cards. It's great fun!"

  • 7. Lovehoney Unwrap Me Men's Thong

    Lovehoney Unwrap Me Thong

    Presenting the perfect package, this provocative thong from the Unwrap Me collection is the gift of all gifts.

    Its daring opening to the front is tied with a soft satin bow that's easy to tug open with fingers, toes or teeth...

    • G-string with posing pouch for generous packages
    • Ribbon unties to reveal Santa's sack
    • One size fits most
    Ideal for:
    • The Show Off
    What they say:

    "I wore it Valentine's morning and then later when my girlfriend pulled off my jeans and saw it... her eyes lit up! Let's just say I haven't seen anyone so eager to grab something since the first time I went to Nando's!"

  • £20 and under

    8. Broad City Respect Your Dick Love Ring

    Broad City Respect Your Dick 10 Function Love Ring

    Attention, Broad City fans! This mini marvel for couples will heat things up between the sheets. With its vibrating multispeed bullet and twin rings it is the gift that keeps on giving. Put a ring (or two) on it this Christmas! You’re welcome.

    • Powerful vibrating cock ring
    • Removable bullet vibrator
    • Waterproof
    Ideal for:
    • Couples Who Like to Spice Things Up
    What they say:

    "I actually think that the vibrator works well with the love ring. I also love that it transforms my husband's dick into the best vibrator ever. You can't find a more realistic vibrator than that."

    • 9. Desire Luxury Orgasm Balm

      Desire Luxury Orgasm Balm 30g

      Get sleigh bells jingling and sexy bits tingling with our Desire luxury Orgasm Balm this Christmas. Dab a little bit of this thrilling menthol-infused concoction onto clitoris, nipples or penis and enjoy new pleasurable sensations.

      • Luxurious infused balm for sexy play
      • Increases sensitivity where you want them most
      • Discreet 30g pot ideal for travel
      Ideal for:
      • The Foreplay Lover
      What they say:

      "When I first put it on, straight away I felt the warm tingling sensation, it creates that tingle you get when you're horny. I'm being honest here, it's powerful stuff."

    • 10. Lovehoney Oh! Hot Knots Beginner's Bondage Game

      Lovehoney Oh! Hot Knots Beginner's Bondage Game (4 Piece)

      A great cheeky gift for a giggle and some inspiration for foreplay and sex, the Lovehoney Oh! Hot Knots Beginner's Bondage Game lets you explore each other in a variety of activities. You will both get your turn thanks to 'switch' cards that allow you to shift which player is in control.

      • Thrilling bondage-style card game
      • 4-piece set with cards, blindfold, satin ties and safety instructions
      • Great for spicing up game night
      Ideal for:
      • The Risk Taker
      What they say:

      "This game worked wonders and definitely spiced up an already active love life, it allowed us to try out things we haven't done before,, giving in to sensual temptations and most importantly have a lot of fun in the process."


    Written by Lovehoney. For collaborative posts between Lovehoney team members and guest authors
    Covering simply everything

    Originally published on 9 Oct 2017. Updated on 5 Aug 2020