Tips for Writing Erotic Fiction

by Nina

on 17 Sep 2018

Tips for Writing Erotic Fiction

Have you ever thought about writing your own erotic stories? Or maybe memoirs? Then you're not alone.

Lots of people feel awkward about sharing their writing – understandably so, if you've ever read a comment section anywhere on the internet.

It's scary to put yourself out there. But it can also be a huge turn-on, and ultimately rewarding.

Even if your audience is just yourself and a lover, erotic writing is a great way to explore fantasies. Writing can relieve stress, and when you're doing it for fun, it can be a welcome break from academic assignments.

If you've ever thought about putting pen to paper, or fingers to keyboard as it's now more often known (though it does sound slightly less romantic), here are some small steps to get you started.

Have fun

Writing, like other tasks you give yourself to do, can cause undue pressure on yourself. Not sexy.

The first step is acceptance; nobody is expecting you to write the next Fifty Shades.

Remind yourself you are writing for you. Grammar, structure, narrative... pffft, get your ideas down and you can fine tune later.

If it stops being fun, stop writing.


Much like bedroom activities, there is no right way to write.

Try journaling, blogging, poetry, lists, recording your voice, writing the same paragraph in eight different ways, expressive dance... Express yourself the way that feels best for you.

Your voice is unique, so you need to learn to embrace it in all its glory.


OK. So you know what you want to write about. You've pictured the steamy details in your mind. What next?

Starting a story can be tough. A good way to begin is to start from the section you want to write about, and you can fill in the details later.

Or ask yourself, how did my character get to this point? What were they doing half an hour ago? This morning? Were they looking forward to a sexual rendezvous? Or were they preoccupied by some mundane task?

Start with what you know and want, then fill in the blanks.


Creating a character is another tricky part of storytelling, but do you know what's hot? If you or your lover are the character(s).

Remember you're not writing a newspaper article, you are not required to be accurate or cite correctly.

If anything, use yourself or someone you know as a character base and elaborate. If you like your feet being tickled, your character might like to be tickled.

If you're stuck for ideas, how about imagining your character is lounging on the sofa waiting for inspiration on a hot summer night, when they hear the familiar sound of their lover's bicycle stopping outside their window, making them excited in anticipation?

Make your experience part of your character's experience.


if you're planning on sharing or publishing your story, get consent from your lover if you want to write a story about them where the character is obviously them and readers would be able to identify them.

If you are worried about your writing falling into the wrong hands, or you just don't want to be associated with your writing, change identifying features such as names and locations.

Using people you know as character bases should be for establishing character traits and behaviours only. You don't want to write an exposé about other people.


One of the fun things about writing is it gives you a good excuse to read other erotica for research purposes.

Take a look at stories such as Pleasure Bound by Lexy Lenox, Earth Angel by Lacey Cummings and They Get Lonely Too by Deacon Redwood for ideas, or browse through Lovehoney's erotic fiction-related blog posts and forums.


Do you have people in your life who are wordy and/or imaginative? Maybe you can work together on a story.

Share drafts, give feedback and became an erotic fiction writing badass team.


Sometimes reading back over your writing is like hearing your voice on an answerphone message.

We all get a little self-conscious and that's fine. You may think your writing is too graphic, too flowery or just too boring. It's not.

It's your voice; if you want to metaphors and symbolism – that's cool. If you want to use profanities, f**king well go for it.

Is this OK?

Do you have a kink, fetish or fantasy you think might be a little too weird?

Firstly, read this blog post, and secondly, remember you are writing fiction rather than your last confession.

Writing is a good place to explore your own desires, with control and reflection.

Finishing off

Not sure where to finish off? That's a fun aspect of erotic fiction.

Unlike an essay, you don't need a conclusion and evaluation. End on a cliffhanger to tease your audience and have them wanting more.

If you've written erotic fiction, or love reading it, we'd love to hear your thoughts below.

Nina is a postgraduate art student in Brighton. Which means she can make origami genitals and pass it off as work. She likes thinking about gender, consent and body positivity.

Download UNISEX Student Lovehoney E-Book

You may also like:


Written by Nina.

Originally published on 17 Sep 2018. Updated on 5 Aug 2020