Belgrade - "A Serbian man needed emergency surgery after sticking a pencil inside his penis to keep it stiff during sex.Zeljko Tupic, from Belgrade, told doctors he had experienced erectile difficulties in the past.So as he prepared for a night with his new lover, he decided to insert a thin pencil into his penis.Tupic had to cut his sex session short when the pencil shifted and became lodged in his bladder, forcing him to call an ambulance, the Kurir newspaper reported." Ananova [Read the full story]
Apparently poor Mr Tupic had never heard of VigRX penis enhancement pills…
Ms Lovehoney hopes you had a cracking Valentines Day! Whatever you got up to, it's got to be better than what the poor women in Japan have to go through - instead of getting chocolate, they have to give it away. Sick and wrong!
Reuters has the full story: "Japanese women are fed up with a longstanding Valentine's Day custom requiring them to give chocolates to men without getting any in return. According to an Internet survey, 70 percent of working women said they would be happy if there was no tradition of giving "obligatory chocolates" to their boyfriends or colleagues. Nearly 60 percent said they felt unhappy as Valentine's Day approached, citing the cost and time it takes to shop for the gifts, which are finely calculated to express just the right emotions towards a boss, a colleague or a true boyfriend. The custom has grown into a sweet 50 billion yen (245 million pound) market for Japan's chocolate makers, some of whom rake in 20 to 30 percent of annual profits in a few short weeks." [Read the full story]
Sky News: Lovers in the Big Apple will soon be able to prove how much they love the Apple in their eye - while showing their fondness for New York at the same time. The city is bringing out New York-branded condoms. The contraceptives will feature city landmarks, such as the Empire State Building, and other city related designs, the New York Post reported. They are expected to be available in four to six months."
Not to be outdone, who's going to be first to make London condoms featuring Big Ben then? We'd put them in our condom shop like a shot.
Reuters: "Call it a sexual revolution of the virtual kind -- young Canadians are practising a new style of safe sex and the only touching required involves a keyboard.
Of more than 2,500 university and college students polled across Canada, 87 percent of them are having sex over instant messenger, webcams or the telephone, according to results of a national survey released on Monday.
"It's now extended within their sexual world, whether it be as a social lubricant as a means to then engage in something that's more real, in more real time, or if it's just a means in itself of pleasuring here and there," said Noah Gurza, a founder of Toronto-based CampusKiss.com, an online dating community for students, which commissioned the first annual Canadian CampusKiss & Tell Survey." [Read the full story]
Blimey. Quite a lot of the virtual whoopee going on there then. We always knew there was something behind the popularity of Instant Messager. We've got a deeply cool Wireless Remote Control Egg if you want to tease your partner from afar - not quite virtual, but possibly more fun.
Now, we're all for pampering, but Je Joue is a whole new level of bling when it comes to self-pleasure. The ultimate in personal gratification, the Je Joue massager is the most creative and satisfying sex toy ever designed. It quivers, glides and swirls over your most sensitive areas in patterns of infinitely variable thrilling vibrations.
The Je Joue handset is supplied with three changeable pleasure pads that deliver different thrilling sensations.
The pleasure pad can slide, swirl, tease, tantalise and shake, with the movements controlled by the PleasureWare software supplied - program your own pleasure patterns!
Je Joue connects to your computer (PC or Mac) with PleasureWare software so you can design your own Pleasure Grooves. Download them to the handset with the USB cable supplied and prepare for bliss.
This could well be the ultimate Valentine's present - either from a boy who really cares (because the £200+ price tag will take some definite commitment) or, of course, just to yourself. Because, as they say, you're worth it.
If Je Joue is out of your budget range, you can still get your pleasure grooves with the iBuzz
If you've been enjoying the Channel 4 comedy series The IT Crowd, you'll know all about the perils of dating geeks. Shy and nervous they may be, but give them a bit of self confidence and they become unstoppable love machines - and they'll be forever grateful to you for it too. Sex Tips For Geeks is an exhaustive guide for geeky men to finally understand what women want - and give it to them! So if there's a geek you've developed a crush on but know he'll be too diffident to do anything, print this out, leave it on his desk and affix your email on a post-it note…
We talked about what you'd do with 100 dildos before, but what would you do with 25 million condoms? The Brazilians know - they have a carnival! The enlightened Brazilian government are distributing 25 million condoms completely free during the country's famous Carnival holidays, which will see the entire country go party crazy. As Reuters reports: "Carnival kicks off across the nation on February 25, heralding several days of parades, parties, revelry and, for some people, sexual abandon. The Rio de Janeiro carnival is the best known worldwide but every big city has its own celebrations."
Ladies! If you're fond of giving love bites but your partner finds you a bit too tiger-like sometimes, tell them to ponder the mating rituals of giant squid and consider themselves lucky.
"New Zealand based marine biologist Steve O'Shea says giant squid have some bizarre mating methods.
He says the creatures do not mean to eat each other but the females accidentally bite bits off of the males during mating.
"It's not intentional cannibalism, it's certainly inadvertent," he said." [Read the full story at UnderwaterTimes.com]
We have, naturally, a whole bunch of edible sex items - like the Edible Bra, Edible Thong and Edible Undies, plus Erotic Edible Body Powder and lots of other Rude Food. That should stop you acting like an overly-large horny cephalopod.
Ananova: "Roseanne Barr says George Clooney does impressions of Groucho Marx - with his penis.
She told Attitude magazine: "One night we were all drunk, John Goodman took a picture of George naked with Groucho Marx glasses over his private area and we used to have that on the fridge on the Roseanne show with a magnet on top of it."
"But someone stole it. I always check to see if it's on eBay, all of us do, but somebody must have just thrown it away because it's never shown up." [Read the full story] [via Gloria Brame]