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  1. A lot of people didn't think we were serious when we said we were going to collect sex toys for recycling as part of our Rabbit Amnesty scheme.

    But we were and here's the proof!

    How Your Sex Toys are Recycled

    When it comes to melding technology and sex, there aren't many people more in the know than Kyle Machulis of sex-tech site Slashdong. Kyle has several reports from the recent Arse Electronika "conference about pr0nnovation", including this clip where he says really nice things about iBuzz Two (after demonstrating a moaning femmebot).

    You can see more of Kyle's Arse Electronika photos on Flickr.

    Durex Play Sensations Personal Lubricant Sachets<br />

    After my sleepless night last night pondering "America's Favorite" lube, I've had lubes on the brain all day. Which is not un-distracting at work, though it does make for some amusing conversations with your officemates when you ponder which lube would best make for coffee mug sliding races on the desk. (We thought it would be a heavy silicone based lube, if you were curious - though you should feel free to try it out for yourselves)

    While I may still not know what "America's Favorite" is, or even how that is defined, I do know some good lubes that serve their own purposes. It is always a sound idea to match the lube to the job, so I present to you:

    Five Lubes for Five Jobs

    It's the second of our videos from the Venus Sex Show, in which my johnson gets a treat from a masturbation machine.

    At the end of day two of the Venus Berlin Sex Show, a dump from the camera's memory reveals some random weirdness - most of it willy-shaped.

    Penis salami - looks like a penis! Have you ever noticed when you're at at deli counter in Sainbsbury's that the salami (titter) looks just like a (titter) penis (titter).

    Well, somebody else has too, so they've taken sausage-tittering to the logical extreme and produced a salami THAT REALLY DOES LOOK LIKE A PENIS! And they called it Mr Salami.

    One slice or two?

    Male masturbators from SOM Japan More good news from the Venus Berlin Sex Show for the world's lazy onanists, this time from Japan. And no, we don't mean the pretty Japanese girl in the bunny outfit, rather the SOM Series of electrical masturbators that she's representing.

    Much more clinical in appearance than many fucking machines - a polite way of saying they don't look like they've been made in a shed - the SOM Series is a range of masturbators, two for men and one for women.

    Here's a question for you: how lazy does a man have to be not to wank himself off? Pretty lazy and pretty wealthy, if the prices of the male masturbation machines on display at Venus are anything to go by.

    Once upon a time, a bloke would lie on his left arm for half an hour before bashing the bishop and that was enough to make it feel like someone else was doing it. Now, though, some of the finest (or perviest) minds in engineering are trying to perfect the perfect wank for the laziest men alive.

    A behind-the-scenes glimpse into the trade hall at the Venus Sex Show in Berlin. Penis bean bags, porn DVD vending machines, and a guy with a hands-free masturbator await. Oh, and not to mention the crazy fucking machine at the end…

    Birthing Balls At first glance they look like birthing balls - the giant extra-strong beach balls that are used for exercise by pregnant women and (probably) people who don't pronounce "pilates" to rhyme with "pirates".

    But take a second look, there's most evidently something amiss. Or in addition. The brains behind the Sexcerciseball have taken the common or garden (and inoffensive) birthing ball and turned it into something all the more exciting - and they're claiming a world first in the process.

    "Proceed with caution" is the mantra of the day when it comes to a visit to Venus, Europe's (if not the West's) biggest sex show. The vast majority of exhibitors are here to show off off their XXX-rated pornographic wares, so you're rarely more than 6 feet away from a 40-inch plasma screen showing, well, 40 inches of rutting, sucking and fu… You can guess the rest.

    So, with caution in mind, our first despatch from the show floor is relatively tame, focusing on a couple or three products that wouldn't look out of place in your living room - that is, if your living room happens to be in a brothel…

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