When you're picking out the perfect sex toy, what it looks like often plays a huge part in your selection process.
Sure, we may all long for a bulgingly-veined, intricately-detailed flesh-tone dildo with bulbous balls, or a velvety-soft vulva in a tube, but should you accidentally forget to close a drawer or have one of those snoopy roommates, they're not the most… discreet of items.
While we believe no one should be ashamed of masturbating or using sex toys (after all, as Jim's dad would say in American Pie, "It's a perfectly natural, normal thing"), we also appreciate that letting your freak flag quite so blatantly isn't always appropriate.
So, in the name of incognito intimate explorers everywhere, we've gathered this collection of sensational sex toys and accessories that look nothing like you (or anyone else) would expect them to.
Let's just say, if discretion is the better part of valour, then these sex toys are your erotic Knights of the Round Table.
Whether it’s your first-time toy or your fifteenth, sometimes the sheer world of choice out there can make picking the perfect sex toy a little intimidating. Regardless of gender, many people can be overwhelmed with the volume of choice out there, and knowing how to narrow your search down can be tricky.
However, before you slip your selection into your basket (as it were), there are a few things that you should consider so that you know you’re picking the perfect plaything.
Above: Whether you're buying for yourself or someone else, there are some things you need to know before you buy a sex toy. Watch this video guide with Jess Wilde to find out the 7 things you must know before you shop.
Incredibly popular in the 1980s and 1990s, teddies and bodysuits have recently seen a resurgence in popularity.
Fashion bloggers are tucking them into high-waisted shorts, celebs are flashing them on the red carpet, and tons of high-street stores are once again slipping them onto the shelves.
But whilst the fashion world is going crazy for teddies as outerwear, many of us are still reluctant to wear them as sexy lingerie - a fact that I found curious, as there are some truly stunning bedroom bodies out there.
So I took to the forums to ask our customers about their reservations when it comes to the all-in-one, and some of the answers I got may surprise you…
Read on below to see the most common teddy dilemmas, and my top tips for how to find the perfect body for your - well - body.
The big day is nearly here, and with Christmas delivery cut off dates fast approching it's time to make your final gift giving decisions. Dun dun dunnn!
That's all very well and good, but what if you're still torn between what to buy? Or maybe you literally have no idea what to get? Never fear, Jess is here!
To help you on your way to festive friskiness, I've selected my top sexy gifts for this Christmas and filmed myself telling you all about them in just 60 seconds whilst wearing a Santa hat. (Don't say I never do anything for you.)
So whether it's seasonal spanking, remote control romance or a merry massage you're after, watch me go against the clock to tell you why you should include one of these kinky couples gifts in your lover's stocking this year.
Still not sure which one is right for you? Take my Xmas Kinky Couples Quiz to find the ulitmate match for your loved one.
December 25th is sneaking up and you still haven't nailed that perfect gift for your man-friend. By day, you scour every conversational transcript, cherishing hopes of a gift-purchasing clue, by night, you endure night-terrors of your lover's teary face under the tree.
Well fret no more friend, as here I am in glorious Technicolor with a whole caboodle of stellar sex toy suggestions for your partner, to get his motor running and his frown upside-down.
Check out the videos below to see each of my 60-second summaries of the fabulous benefits of everything from performance masturbators to prostate massagers. Offering an in-depth look at each toy plus my personal take on what makes each one so special, get a swift and comprehensive overview of these choice picks in less time than it takes to eat an apple.
"The bodice accentuates each and every curve precisely the way a basque should; hugging here and caressing there, just like your lover will. The good thing about grouped sizing (i.e. small, medium, large) instead of tailored measurements is the slightly stretchy quality which allows for changes in size/weight as well as simple preference. This basque is also equipped with a triple row of eyelet fasteners for added adjustability." Read the full review.
Read on below to see if you were a runner up, and remember to submit your review now to be in the running next month.
The film follows two serial cheaters (who lost their virginity to each other years before) as they attempt to reel in their horny tendencies and prove that men and women can just be friends.
It's full to the brim with funny people like Jason Sugeikis (Horrible Bosses), Alison Brie (The Five-Year Engagement) and Natasha Lyonne (Orange is the New Black). Check out the trailer below!
Take our poll below and if you're really in the sharing mood, you can tell us about your ex sex story in the comment section for the chance to win a Lovehoney Mains Powered Deluxe Magic Wand Vibrator and two cinema tickets to go and see the film, courtesy of Icon (thanks guys!).