How to Spice Up Your Sex Life in a Long Term Relationship
Keeping sex fresh, exciting and spontaneous is quite a task - even for the most adventurous couples as your relationship begins to feel as comfortable as a pair of old trackie bottoms.
Avoid the seven-year itch by making some minor changes to your sexual repertoire and keep the lust alive for years to come with these easy tricks and tips.
1. Shake Up Your Routine
One of the biggest passion killers is your day-to-day routine, especially if you’re cohabiting with your partner. Couples who spend their lives outside of work living in one another’s pockets tend to subconsciously schedule their sex lives, making sex a predictable event…
If you’re only getting frisky before you go to sleep and/or when you wake up in the morning, you may get a little bored and stop having the urge to indulge. If sex feels like just another part of your daily ritual, it’s time to re-evaluate.
Place a ban on routine sex and find alternative times to be intimate with your partner. Get frisky on the sofa while watching your favourite shows and let hands wander under the table when you’re out to dinner. Instigating sex at different times in different places will help keep things fresh, especially if you’re both committed to initiating the action.
2. Dress to Undress
His boxers have holes in and your underwear hardly ever matches. Sound familiar?! Once we’ve snared our partners it’s easy to get a little too relaxed with our appearance. One bout of 'flu too many and you become at ease with your partner seeing you at your worst.
It’s wonderful to feel more comfortable with your partner but you’re doing yourself a disservice if you’re failing to make any effort at all. Dressing up in sexy underwear makes you feel more sexy, which give you a greater desire to have sex. We’re our most outgoing and sexually excitable when we feel that we look good, so making an effort with your undies is a great place to start if passion is wilting.
Try trading your t-shirt bra and cartoon pants for a saucy basque and matching thong and ditch those wooly tights for a pair of sexy stockings. You don’t have to dress up every day, in fact it has more impact if you’re spontaneous with your lingerie choices.
By making an extra effort once or twice a week you’ll feel sexier and he’ll find you sexier. If he insists on flaunting the same sorry pants, replace them with some sexy men's underwear instead. It goes both ways, after all.
3. Vary Your Seduction Style
I used to date a guy who always initiated sex by stroking his fingers up and down my body for five minutes before going in for a grope. Although this can be pretty hot, it becomes annoying the tenth time in a row. Initiating sex in varied ways keeps things interesting for both of you and ensures that you’re not getting predictable.
Try sexting, flirty emails and saucy phone calls to plant naughty thoughts in his mind before you both get home from work. Passionate just-through-the-door sex isn’t only for new relationships. Erotic massage, offering to share a bath, stripping at opportune moments or just turning a kiss on the lips into something more shows your partner that you want them passionately. Remember how it was when you were first together and put the same effort into seducing them as you did the first time around.
If you find yourselves doing the same things in the bedroom time and time again, playing a sexy board game could add some new moves to your repertoire.
Monogamy: A Hot Affair Game boasts an amazing 400 different action cards to put a stop to predictable sex, culminating with one of fifty fantasies you and your partner will act out.
Sex games lift creative responsibility from both of your shoulders, allowing you to enjoy one another without slipping back into comfortable and familiar habits.
5. Experiment with Different Sex Toys
Vibrators for women are fairly commonplace in the bedroom but there are plenty of other sex toys aimed at couples to share. We-Vibe 4 Plus Remote Control Couples Vibrator is a vibrator you can enjoy together completely hands free. It slips up against her G-spot, curving out of the body and against the clitoris. The G-spot stimulator is slimline enough for him to penetrate her while she’s wearing it, transforming sexual pleasure for both partners. And best of all, you can control it with your smartphone!
If you’re a little unsure about shared sex toys but know what you enjoy, spend some time making a Lovehoney wishlist of all the sex toys you’d like to try and ask your partner to do the same. Take it in turns to buy each other gifts and you’ll have something new and exciting to experiment with together.
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