My husband is verbally and physically abusive and I just don't know what to do. Please help
He might be a good dad but it’s definitely not good for your children to witness his emotional, and now physical, abuse.
I’ve been married for twelve years and have two kids aged six and four. For the past couple of years my husband has been verbally abusive and he’s now started shoving me around and slapping me if I say something stupid.
He repeatedly tells me I’m fat and useless in bed, and that I’m lucky to have him as no-one else would want me. I have zero self-esteem and I’m starting to believe him, but I don’t want to leave as the kids are so little and he’s a good dad. I just don’t know what to do. Please help.
He might be a good dad but it’s definitely not good for your children to witness his emotional, and now physical, abuse. And don’t underestimate the damage it’s doing you.
I’m tempted to advise you to get out now, before things get any worse, but if you don’t feel able to do that, then you need a plan of action to protect you. You don’t have to deal with this alone - there are many agencies such as Refuge (freephone 0808 2000 247) that offer confidential help and support - or is there a friend or family member you can trust and confide in?
Start making a private record of events, and in case the situation does deteriorate, it’s a good idea to keep a bag with some money, keys, a list of emergency numbers and a set of clothes for all of you, in a safe place. Domestic violence is a crime - you are not to blame for his behaviour, he’s choosing to control you by intimidation. But remember you also have a choice in how you respond.