Our sex life has become boring since having kids. Is anal sex the answer?
It's not quite as simple as getting your wife to let you try anal sex. I think the answer here is to look at the bigger picture.
How can I get my wife to let us try anal sex, please? I want her to let me play with her during sex a lot more as our sex life at the moment is so boring. We used to have so much fun making love, but since we had two kids, her sex drive just went. Please help as I am tired of using my hand.
I don’t think it’s quite as simple as getting your wife to let you try anal sex. It’s very common for a woman’s sex drive to dwindle with the responsibilities of young children to look after - plus the output of energy required - and you need to be sensitive to that. Rather than focusing on letting you try anal sex - or anything else specific that you may be craving - I think the answer here is to look at the bigger picture.
In order to rediscover some of the fun that you had making love, then start by creating some time for the two of you to just enjoy some general fun together. It’s easy to get so caught up in the business of being parents, that you forget the two individuals that you were - and still are! With the help of friends, family or babysitters, you can work out regular opportunities for the two of you to go off and enjoy an evening together - or even stay in and enjoy one, with the children looked after somewhere else.
Don’t be surprised if it takes a bit of getting used to, being alone together, but focus on just having fun, making each other laugh, enjoying a film, a walk, a drink or a meal. As you start to enjoy each other’s company again - with these short breaks from your responsibilities as parents - you will begin to feel closer, and the lines of communication should open up, allowing you in time to discuss your sex life, along with everything else.
And when you do eventually talk about sex, and her feelings about anal etc., make sure that you don’t pile the pressure on - none of us respond well to that. Be sensitive, and make sure she knows how much you love, fancy and appreciate her - something else that can get neglected when we’re busy putting so much into our families. And make it an exchange rather than something one-sided - it’s very likely there are things she’s been missing, too.
Refreshingly frank and funny, actress and presenter Julie Peasgood delivers practical information to transform your sex life. The Greatest Sex Tips in the World explores the world of eroticism, revealing secrets and techniques that will energise and enhance your enjoyment.