1. "Like a plastic prosthetic prolapse" Sex Toys Review Round-Up

    Another week, another set of exceptional sex toy reviews. Product-wise, there have been some flops but there have also been some toys that are proving to be firm favourites. So good, in fact, that one Lovehoney reviewer states, "I can honestly say I am entirely happy to die right now".

    So what has been pleasuring, and paining, you this week?

    This week's sex toy review round up

    njoy Eleven

    It was love at first sight for sven when the njoy Eleven arrived on the doormat with a satisfying thud. "I can honestly say I am entirely happy to die right now after having experienced the njoy eleven work its magic on me". We hope it will serve you for many years to come!

    Pasante Female Condom

    "Like a plastic prosthetic prolapse…" touched for the very first, and very last, time? We can safely assume that mtunreal69 will not be using the Pasante Female Condom again. I've never seen anything so disgusting, like a wet binbag stuck inside me, or like I'd prolapsed and discovered my innards were plastic." I hope the giggle mtunreal69's account gave us all will go some way to make up for the emotional scarring. Sorry about that.

    SolarStim Vibrating Bullet

    For "the ultimate eco-gasm", yummybunny gave the SolarStim Vibrating Bullet a try. After all our assurances at Lovehoney that this was a totally powerful green giant, a real customer gives their verdict: "It definitely rivals the power of a vibe taking several batteries! Packs quite a punch! Gave me a wonderfully intense orgasm! PHEW!" Lovehoney insider tip: judge how good a toy is from the number of exclamations used in a review.

    Perfect Hole Realistic Pussy Masturbator

    And now for a unique insight into Londongeezer's experience with the Perfect Hole Realistic Pussy Masturbator. "I am lucky enough to get very hard very easily, but there are limits… the feel of the interior on your finger is all you're gonna get." Hmmm, would Londongeezer petition for it to be renamed the Perfect Hole Digit Diddler?

    Lelo Siri

    Finally, Starlight* has a lot to account for: mainly inducing intense feelings of lust and longing for the Lelo Siri. The pleasure object, "can cater for everybody's needs: for the girl who wants the slow, sensuous vibrations, or the woman who requires a stronger, more powerful thrill." And her final verdict? "It is something every female should have!" Want.

    If you've had a life-changing experience - for better or worse - then tell us about it by adding a new review.