The Sex Blogger's Christmas Blogging Survival Guide
Christmas is an occasion for spending time with the family, eating lots of food, drinking lots of booze and not to mention, the glorious exchange of gifts.
But its also a huge stress and always leaves me feeling like I've just ran a hundred marathons in one go.
So to all my fellow sex bloggers out there, I thought I'd lend you a hand this Christmas by giving you my top 5 tips for sex blogging this festive season.
Number 1 - HNT Christmas style
There are 4 hot naked Thursday's before Christmas, so why not make each one super sexy with a yuletide twist? Men, why not be a bit silly and wear a Santa hat on your head and one on your, err… other head! Or tie a little bow around your penis and photograph yourself giving it to someone special. And ladies, there are so many yuletide HNT opportunities for you that I could write a blog as long as Santa's naughty list! You could do anything from dressing up as a sexy Mrs Clause, to hanging Christmas decorations off your nipples! Ooh, the possibilities are endless.
Number 2 - Preparation
We all know that the more organised we are around Christmas, the more prepared we'll be for when it all kicks off. But I'm not talking about making sure you have all your presents wrapped, a turkey the size of a baby elephant prepped and ready and enough Valium to last the holiday with your in-laws. No no no. You need to be prepared for the spontaneous sex that could happen at any time. So make sure you have plenty of condoms, lube and batteries to keep you going throughout the mayhem, especially when Christmas arrives and all shopping comes to an abrupt stop. And make sure you skimp on the post-sex cuddles - I just want to read all about how you just got ding dong merrily on high on top of a load of tinsel and wrapping paper!
Number 3 - The office Christmas party
The office Christmas party is a gold mine of potential blog posts. There's an endless amount of booze on offer and suddenly that really shy co-worker that works in accounts/finance/marketing (you know, the one you've never paid any attention to before) has just become a shameless tease. As well as that, for some reason unknown to you but which can only be blamed on the 12 vodka jelly shots you've just necked, they've just become really attractive and before you know it, you're in the stationery cupboard with your hands down each others pants. All the while, someone else is sitting their bare buttocks on the photocopier 'for a laugh' and your boss is getting off with the receptionist. An office Christmas party is never without excitement, a serious hangover and a memory so blurred you can't even remember your own birthday, but it all makes for some great reading for your blog followers!
Number 4 - TLC
Make sure you set aside some time to give your blog readers some TLC. I follow quite a few blogs and I look forward to my daily dose of sexy news, gossip and stories. Why not treat your followers to some outrageous erotic literature, and make it as cliched as you can for the festive holiday? I'm thinking a thick blanket of pure white snow, a snowball fight that leads to getting all wet and cold and the inevitable dash to the warm little cottage, followed by rampant sex in front of the roaring fire. It doesn't get anymore cliched than that at Christmas.
Number 5 - Relax
Take some time out and indulge in a little you time. Christmas is the time for giving, so why not give yourself something special, such as the Sqweel Oral Sex Simulator for you ladies or the Tenga Black Flip Hole Masurbator for you men (I've said it before, but I wish I had a penis to put in one of these!). Taking some time out to indulge will give you more than just the one happy ending, if you get my drift. It'll leave you feeling unwound, calm and ready to face the rest of Christmas. Plus it'll give you some great material for a review, which will hopefully lead to more people indulging in some self-giving of their very own, that will ultimately result in a world of peace and love. Isn't that what Jesus would have wanted?!