Damaged by Disembodied Arse - Why Working At Lovehoney Isn't All Fun and Games
You may think that working for the UK's biggest and best online sex toy retailer is a laugh a minute but it's actually a very serious job fraught with danger.
From getting lube in your eye to getting trapped under an avalanche of cock, if you're not on your guard all these things can catch you out and lead to serious injury or in some extreme cases a trip to the first aid box.
Today, there was such an incident. An incident so traumatic and horrifying, that it hurts to speak of it even now.
Late in the afternoon, as part of my 'measure all the orifices in the building' project, I had to retrieve the Adam and Eve Carmen Luvana Doggy Style CyberSkin Pussy and Ass from one of the top shelves in the warehouse.
Weighing in at over 4 kilos, Carmen Luvana's arse is exceptionally heavy and instantly slipped from my hands when I went to pick it up. Being a total hero; I went to grab it before it hit the ground and mortally wounded myself in the process.
Carmen Luvana's arse sheared a layer of skin off my thumb and required emergency plaster-based surgery.
As you can see from the photos, it was pretty bad.