Keep sexy food in a mini fridge next to the bed

Comments (4)

• paula: October 09, 2008 22:19

  i have an 8months old baby and since then till now my husband and i hardly have sex if we do it will be only like 2or 3 times in one month.and it dont be good he only last less than 10 minutes.what i should do i try all sort of sexy lundry and food moves and still it doesnt work.i dont feel sexy anymore or loved what i must do.is there anything else im very hurt and dissapointed in my self. im very sexy and i did loose all the weight,from the baby not all but 80%,when i was carring my baby i was 160 now im 130pounds.please i need some advice.hut

• Tina: December 31, 2008 03:54

  Babe, it is perfectly normal for this to be happening this soon after having a baby. It happens differently to a lot of women. But if the problem is on his part, and fro mthe impression you give it is, then it's less to do with your post pregnancy libido, and more to do with how ne sees you sexually, now you've had a baby. It shouldn;t ever be just about how you look, although looks are one of the first things a guy will notice in a girl. You don't fell attrected to those you trhink are ugly, do you?!

  Just try having a nice long talk to him about how he feels about you now, and how you look. If what you hear from him feels wrong or upsetting in any way, it may be time to re-evaluate your relationship. But he may just be experiencing confidence problems of his own, there are many reasons why the sex may change in a relationship. You've gotta have this talk soon, instead of trying a barrage of things that will probably fail too. Right now you're treating the symptom, not the cause.

  And remember, an average guy only takes a literal two minutes to reach climax, so if you're getting 10 minutes out of him, you're darn lucky! Also, cock rings work great, the litle vibrating ones. ;)

• eljay: March 21, 2009 20:44

  For a start I have just noticed this section of the love honey site. Speaking as a GRANNY, ok, I am not yet 50, but I can rememeber simelar situation to what you are going through when I had my first kido just over 26 years ago. I had the stitches and the sore bum and the sleepless nights, and still having to get up to do the feeds and the daytime lookng after etc etc, etc. Nothing changes. It has been the same for generations, women feel huge and grotesque after giving birth, it is in their genetic make-up to devote more time to their offspring than their mate. And the mate will feel rejected.

  However, and there has to be a however, self image and reality are often different. I still strive to keep slim and attractive for my husband but he always confesses to like me when I have a bit more 'meat' on me. ( I am no stick, I am a curvy size 16)

  Your other half might feel threatened by the baby - who must now be more than a year- taking his place in your life, after all you are the one who is nurturing this, his child. Encourage his paternal instincts and keep telling him you love him and, when the right time comes along tell him how much you want him to fuck you - be blatent, dont beat around the bush, tell him - take the initiative.

  Unfortunatly, you have to persevere with him, men are so .....stupid.

  I am lucky that I am married to a very undersatnding man who has always remained fithful to me even though I have not remained faithful to him (and I did tell him). One rule for him and another for me !!!

  I also have a jessica rabbit and that is probably the best advice I can give you.

  Sorry, had a few glasses of wine...hic.

• Tina: March 21, 2009 23:08

  I don't think this has got a lot to do with her not making a lot of effort for her man, I think he might well feel threatned about her baby, but she needs to have the talk with him that I suggested rather than talking dirty to him to try and get him to fuck er. If he isn't going near her as often as he used to, there's something a lot deeper going on than just not making enough of a physical effort. And it's important this is underlined, because problems on the surface are caused by deeper psychological issues.

  she's made it pretty clear in her post that she is the one who wants the sex and she makes every effort she can, so telling her to make more effort with him is not going to work out!

  I think, Paula, you need to have the heart to heart with your man I previously suggested, but don't focus so much on how much sex you're getting. Right now, you sound like you need to take the time out for YOU and sort out the feelings you're having in your own head about how you perceive yourself. It may well even be that becasue you feel so awful about yourself right now, he is picking up on this ans feeling less attracted as a result. After all, if you don't like you, you can't expect others to.

  I mean no disrespect to eljay, I just think it's important to stres that this is more a psychological issue that she needs to address rather than a physical one.