13 Toys for the Most Common Sexual Fantasies
on 2 Oct 2020
Sexual fantasies are imagined scenarios that arouse us, and almost all of us (a whopping 95%) have had one. Plus, a lucky 50% of us have one every single day!
We have them most commonly when we're daydreaming, masturbating and when having sex. And the best bit – lots of us are fantasising about the same or very similar things.
Most of us fantasise about things that fall into three main genres: group sex, novelty, and power/control.
Having sexy fantasies enhances our masturbation and sexual experiences and they're a fantastic and healthy tool to rehearse, anticipate or explore future or past experiences.
Almost every single one of us has had a fantasy about sex with more than one other person at the same time.
Most of us like to fantasise about a specific number of people, like the golden number 3. The idea of multiple people admiring, desiring and pleasuring us (or our sexual partners) all at the same time can be thrilling. While lots of people have this fantasy, it's statistically most popular in people aged 40 and up!
Some sex toys that might feel like you've got some extra company in the bedroom include:
Novelty, or trying something new, is the next big genre of fantasy. This one is mainly all about the anticipation, excitement and nervousness of trying something for the first time.
The 'I've never done this before' feeling – it's exhilarating. Some things that fall into this category are fantasising about having sex in a new place (like publicly) or trying out sex toys. Popular fantasised public sex places are: in a park, on a plane, in a car, in a public toilet and at work.
Obviously, the "I've never done this before" feeling is subject to each person and each couple, but here are some things to try if you haven't already:
Power and control
The third common genre of fantasy is power and control. One route into this kind of fantasy is through BDSM. Lots of us have at some point fantasised about bondage (being restrained or restraining another), discipline (giving or taking orders) or inflicting/receiving pain (popular fantasies are through biting and spanking).
Some toys that can accessorise any BDSM play are:
Erotic fantasies are normal, healthy and helpful. They can increase our interest arousal, sexual satisfaction and sexual functioning.
Remember, having fantasies doesn't necessarily mean that you want to enact your fantasy. There might be multiple things out in the real-life sex world that logistically prevent it from ever happening. But, the amazing thing about fantasy is that you're in full control of the scenario as it plays out in your head.
This is also why many people choose not to play out their fantasy, as it remains 'perfect' and in their control while in the mind. Happy dreaming!
Eleni is a health communications student from Sydney. Her favourite topics to communicate are sexual health, gender and sexuality; she spends her time smashing taboo topics everywhere she goes.