How can I impress my older girlfriend by showing I really understand women?

Posted on: September 08, 2008 09:09 | Posted by: Tracey Cox

To make sex better for both of you, change your focus to make it less orgasm focused. Don't have sex that has a typical beginning, middle and end.

Question:

My new girlfriend is older and I suspect a lot more experienced than me.

I want to impress her by showing I really understand women. Can you give me a hint on how to do this?

Tracey Says:

Most men make love to women in the same sequence - they'll start with kissing, move onto the breasts, then stimulate her vaginally with their fingers, throw in some oral sex, then move onto 'the main event' which is (for men) intercourse.

This suits you nicely because as a guy, your arousal tends to build in a nice, steady, predictable fashion. A bit like climbing stairs with orgasm happening on the top one.

Research suggests female desire works differently. It moves in a circular fashion. Men are you usually aroused before they even begin having sex. Women often become aroused and feel desire once the action starts, moving in a more erratic pattern toward climax.

To make sex better for both of you, change your focus to make it less orgasm focused. Instead of following the pattern of your typical sex session, which I described above, try something like this: cuddling/kissing - intercourse (you orgasm) - tie up game with manual genital stimulation for her - kissing - oral sex (she orgasms) - intercourse (though not to orgasm for either) - oral sex for him (you orgasm) - intercourse - and so on.

In other words, don't have sex that has a typical beginning, middle and end.

The Sex Doctor is a fantastic compilation of libido-lifting tips, tricks and techniques, all written in Tracey's inimitable, no-nonsense style.

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