Can women suffer from performance anxiety in the same way as men do?

Posted on: August 18, 2008 11:08 | Posted by: Tracey Cox

Of course women can suffer from performance anxiety - it doesn't just relate to sex, it applies to any situation. But it's not as obvious as it is for him.

Question:

I know men suffer from performance anxiety where they can't get an erection at the crucial moment, but can women suffer from the same thing? I get really turned on playing around in public but the second I'm somewhere where sex is definitely going to happen, I suddenly get scared.

Tracey Says:

Of course women can suffer from performance anxiety - it doesn't just relate to sex, it applies to any situation. Luckily for us though, it's not quite as obvious as it is for him.

We can 'fake' arousal simply by going to the loo and placing some lubricant high into the vagina with a finger, before foreplay. The heat and his fingers will draw it down.

I'm wondering though if this is really the problem. This sounds like sex with casual or short-term partners. It might simply be that you need to be in love or a committed relationship in order to relax. Take baby steps with sex and take things really slowly.

Wait until you trust the guy then tell him you're nervous and get frightened. I suspect once you're with the right guy - who makes you feel safe - the problem will right itself.

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