Anal sex toys - a beginner's guide
Posted on: June 11, 2008 13:06 | Posted by: Bonny
Anal sex is the one sexual subject that's guaranteed to put the 'oooh' into 'taboo'. Want to have a go with your partner but don't know how to start? Try this for size...
Anal sex hit mainstream paydirt when Bridget Jones did it with Hugh Grant in that posh hotel. A million proto-Bridgets watched the movie and thought: if Hugh does it, it's fine by me. We are never one to miss a cultural phenomenon, and what with the rise and rise of J-Lo and Kylie's bottoms we reckon there's been no hotter time for taking the alterna-route to penetrative pleasure.
But doesn't it hurt?
That depends on what you do. Anal intercourse is just one kind of anal sexual play. The sphincter muscle ring is rich in nerve endings and welcomes gentle stimulation by fingers, tongues or toys like the gently rounded tip of a vibrating Ass Shaker or one or two Pleasure Beads and plenty of Aquaglide Anal Lubricant. Do as much or as little as you like, and you'll soon see why one of the last great sexual taboos is enjoyed by around a third of western couples, gay and straight.
How do I bring up the subject?
Good sex is all about communication, so discuss your anal fantasies before ploughing ahead. Take your partner by surprise and he may take flight – anal sex isn't necessarily every man's ultimate sexual ambition. Back off if he's not keen, but if he is – and we'll bet he'd love to give it a go – some fun toys are a good way to start.
How do I use them?
Anal beads are more newbie-friendly than larger insertable toys like butt plugs and Power Rods, so give them a try – and there's no rule stating you have to insert all the beads your first time. Again, remember to lube up well. Start slowly with some gentle stroking and fingering before introducing the beads. If you tense up, stop for a while until you're more relaxed. It's not a good idea to use the same fingers or toys to play around the vagina and the anus during the same session, unless they're covered in a condom – bacteria and other nasties can breed like welly down there.I'm not enjoying this...
If it's not for you, it's not for you. Men do tend to find anal penetration more satisfying because it stimulates their prostate – often dubbed the male G-spot, and with good reason. If you're with a partner who won't take no for an answer, Honey thinks you're with the wrong partner.Heck, I love that. What's the next step?
If you enjoy your initial anal play and want to take it further, then keep that lube coming and never be afraid to say when you want to stop. When you try inserting a toy like the soft jelly SpectraGel Smooth Tool or the cute Tantus Big Flirt Silicone Butt Plug, cover it with a condom and take deep breaths, only allowing your partner to push anything in when your sphincter is completely relaxed. When the tip of your toy has been inserted, get him to move it gently in a circular motion so that it stimulates the two rims of your sphincter. Feel good? Oh yes!
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