• Ladies, does your bloke know how much you use your toys or play alone?

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    Cuddly Hubby [sign in to see picture]
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    hornyfish wrote:

    I used one infront of him once and we had a race to see who could make themself come first which was amazing...

    My wife and I sometimes do the opposite -- see who can hold on for longer. It's a good game because it encourages each of us to be more vocal in order to encourage the other along. In the event of any cheating (e.g. sneakily stopping one's own stimulation), then the other player wins by default and gets to control the stimulation to the cheating player for as long as they see fit.

    I seem to win most times and I'm wondering whether there might be a flaw in these rules.

    1409317273
    cherie [sign in to see picture]
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    Nope and sad thing is I am begining to like my toys more than him !!

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    Ame [sign in to see picture]
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    Well it was in fact my boyfriend that offered me my first sex toys... At the time I was still living in my father's home and our relationship was a long distance one, only seeing each other on the weekends or so.

    I always was satisfied using my hands but sometimes some fun was missing, but I admit I have been postponing the purchase of vibes for two years more or less, because in my country the majority of sex shops, even online, are very, very cringe worthy. And at the time there was no guarantee of a discreet packaging, which was mandatory for me as I have always received my mail in my grandparent's home. It was only when I actually discovered Lovehoney that I considered buying toys and my boyfriend offered me the first ones.

    Nowadays I end up buying more toys that can be used as a couple, like buttplugs and such, but I always use them when I'm alone or when I feel like it. Even sometimes the OH uses them on me, before intercourse or just sometimes. He knows I use them when he is not there as I know he sometimes masturbates without me. We don't think this is a reflection of our level of satisfaction with each other, it's just natural and sometimes it can't be avoided! We rather like the idea of each having their private moment sometimes.

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    LibraLover [sign in to see picture]
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    My boyfriend also bought me my first vibrator, and knows about all the ones since (although he says I have enough now lol). He knows most times I use them because he likes me to text him about it. We also use them together. We don't live together, but I do sometimes use them alone when we stay over at each other's houses because I like to use them in the morning and he sleeps in late!

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    Young and fun95 [sign in to see picture]
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    We only use our toys together, and I very rarely mastubate. He says he doesn't mastubate but I don't know, I do have a much higher sex drive than him though so I don't see why he would mastubate when I'm always ready to go

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    Petrichor [sign in to see picture]
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    Mm my boyfriend knows about all my toys (I think he thinks I have a problem! :p ) but I'm not sure he knows how much I use them. It's something I'm actually a little worried about because we're moving intogether in a month or two, and I don't know how it's going to work with using them on my own! Especially since I take such a long time he's bound to notice... I would rather have sex with him (with or without toys) but I haven't had a partnered orgasm in over 3 months now - I'd be going crazy if I wasn't having them by myself either!

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    kittencub [sign in to see picture]
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    Everything I do is solo no he doesn't know if I want satisfaction after watching or fantasies about PC then I'll see to my self he's not interested in sex now so I do as I please.

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    SlinkyRat [sign in to see picture]
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    I'm single at the moment so my toys are just for me. I've never used toys with a partner really, for some reason they feel completely separate for me. Toys are not better than a man, they're different, and the sensations and emotions I get from playing solo versus sex are like night and day. I would be open to trying toys with a new partner but somehow I don't think it would work, toys feel like playing while real sex with a real partner is so much more.

    1409403239
    Gentle giant [sign in to see picture]
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    We have a little pact , in our busy lives and limited special time together. We don't masterbate and only orgasm together. It can be very tough for me as my sex drive is higher. My wife is very clever and uses my sex drive to mentally edge me. It works for us.

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    wildflower [sign in to see picture]
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    My husband is fully aware of all my toys and how often I use them, he says its not a problem for him. Sometime we use them together.
    I certainly don't prefer toys over my husband but they do give a quick orgasm when I feel the need.

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    SR36 [sign in to see picture]
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    In a (very) long distance thing right now so I only use my toys alone. I'm getting very into experimenting and have decided to buy one new one a month. I love to write to my guy and tell him what I'm thinking of getting, especially when I get an email back that details how he'd use it on me! We're both very open about experimenting and I just cannot wait until I get to actually use them with him :)

    1409406661
    pinkanimal [sign in to see picture]
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    I sometimes lie there while he's asleep really horny, not wanting to wake him and not wanting to masturbate in case he wakes up lol
    I'm a very private masturbater lol

    1409406809
    SR36 [sign in to see picture]
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    pinkanimal wrote:

    I sometimes lie there while he's asleep really horny, not wanting to wake him and not wanting to masturbate in case he wakes up lol
    I'm a very private masturbater lol

    I used to do this with my ex! I actually found myself holding my breath not to wake him or going for a "quickie" when I was supposed to be having a shower. Hahaha, makes me laugh just thinking about it (but our sex life was rubbish- hence "ex").

    1409407274
    kittencub [sign in to see picture]
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    pinkanimal wrote:

    I sometimes lie there while he's asleep really horny, not wanting to wake him and not wanting to masturbate in case he wakes up lol
    I'm a very private masturbater lol

    Just lately my drive has gone through the roof, if I want a quickie I have wether he's there or not, as much as I love hubby he is no longer part of my sex life no point in wishing for something you can no longer have ,so I've made my sex life sole based on me and my crushes.

    1409407460
    Dota [sign in to see picture]
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    My OH seen all my toys. We use them together as well as i use them solo. Once he asked about my dildos and vibes- do i still need them and if they're better than him. That was funny. I told they're not better nor worse, they're just different, they spice up our sex life and no toy will ever replace him. And then i asked him- what should i do when i have my needs and he's not home?!
    Every solution is in talking. :)

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    RubyDarling [sign in to see picture]
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    I have no toys yet (no job at the moment, therefore no money...) but I masturbate daily and my man doesn't know. That's my little private world. We never talk about solo play and it's fine.

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    VirginAngel [sign in to see picture]
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    Honestly, my partner does not know i own sex toys, and from the very brief conversation we had about them after his mum left one out, i know he thinks they are weird, and he's not a fan. He'd never want one for himself, and i don't think he would like the thought i use any. To be fair, there are only 2 reasons i do use them. The first is because i am a virgin, and he is rather large. The use of toys is to hopefully losen things up a little bit, since until 5 months ago i had never masturbated, or even used a tampon, and am a little concerned about the pain and possible tearing issue. Reason 2, Ive had a lot of issues of genophobia because of OCD and the fears of losing continence during any kind of physical or sexual activity. I wanted to experiment a bit (always in the shower just incase) just to reassure myself i wasn't going to spontaneously wee and get used to the different feelings to gain a bit more confidence that it isn't leading to something bad. (obviously i avoid G-spot stimulation since it is often described as causing a need to pee feeling, i would panic about that) Our relationship is currently long distance due to health and financial reasons but these are improving, and honestly i don't intend to keep any of the toys once we are capable of visiting eachother. The only reason i bought them in the first place was never to do with pleasure, although knowing what i respond to has helped more with the confidence to communicate what i want/like to improve the experience for us both.

    I do find though, i need to urinate a lot sooner after the times i masturbate than the times i don't, even if my bladder is not particularly full, and this is rather annoying, and as such is a reason why it isn't a regular activity.

    1409434531
    capricorn13 [sign in to see picture]
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    My husband knows all about my toys. We use them together as part of foreplay. If he is away overnight he always asks if I've had the toys out and he gets an honest answer!

    1409434856
    Young and fun95 [sign in to see picture]
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    VirginAngel wrote:

    Honestly, my partner does not know i own sex toys, and from the very brief conversation we had about them after his mum left one out, i know he thinks they are weird, and he's not a fan. He'd never want one for himself, and i don't think he would like the thought i use any. To be fair, there are only 2 reasons i do use them. The first is because i am a virgin, and he is rather large. The use of toys is to hopefully losen things up a little bit, since until 5 months ago i had never masturbated, or even used a tampon, and am a little concerned about the pain and possible tearing issue. Reason 2, Ive had a lot of issues of genophobia because of OCD and the fears of losing continence during any kind of physical or sexual activity. I wanted to experiment a bit (always in the shower just incase) just to reassure myself i wasn't going to spontaneously wee and get used to the different feelings to gain a bit more confidence that it isn't leading to something bad. (obviously i avoid G-spot stimulation since it is often described as causing a need to pee feeling, i would panic about that) Our relationship is currently long distance due to health and financial reasons but these are improving, and honestly i don't intend to keep any of the toys once we are capable of visiting eachother. The only reason i bought them in the first place was never to do with pleasure, although knowing what i respond to has helped more with the confidence to communicate what i want/like to improve the experience for us both.

    I do find though, i need to urinate a lot sooner after the times i masturbate than the times i don't, even if my bladder is not particularly full, and this is rather annoying, and as such is a reason why it isn't a regular activity.

    I have a similar problem with fear of peeing, as I had problems in the past and still do sometimes. I wee before sex which helps with the fear and after because even though I know there's nothing there, I just went! I'm scared of peeing the bed because I get the feeling of needing a pee. I actually wet the bed once while sleeping with the Oh, I felt awful and he just told me loads of storied of his own problems with wee and it's neighbour lol he was totally understanding. Hope that helps a little

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    VirginAngel [sign in to see picture]
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    It's the contamination factor for me, young and fun, i'm OCD and majorly germphobic, and had issues using the toilet since i was old enough to remember, tons of tests as a kid, never found anything wrong with me, but it's like the natural instinct of how to go for a wee just isn't there in my brain, there's been times i've spent upto 6 hours at a time on the toilet just becasue i never feel like i've finished and i have to get my bladder totally empty before i can move. It's awful, my worst day ever i spent 19 hours straight in the bathroom, in a one bathroom house, because i get the feeling of needing to urinate when standing even when my bladder has nothing more than a thimble full in it, but i was at the point where even the time it took to shower after the toilet (i have to every time, germ phobia thing) that i had to jump out the shower and on to the toilet or i was about to wet myself even though there was virtually nothing in there, no doctor can tell me what it is that causes it, if it's physical or neurological, its kept me a prisoner in my home for the last 10 years as im too scared to go anywhere incase i need the toilet a i can only use the one at home and have to jump straight in the shower after, it's exhausting.

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