• Giving a toy as a gift? Good idea? Scary horrible terrible idea?

    1300315132
    silverdrop [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 420
    • Joined: 18 Sep 2006

    I was raised in a rather conservative household, where everyone knew that masturbation was a sin. Obviously I've gotten over that by now. I also think that maybe the rest of the family has kind of gotten over it as well. And I just got the mad idea to give my mom and sister each one of the Shag Factory bullet vibes (the Love and Peace ones) and leave it up to them whether to use it personally or with their husbands.

    I think the worst that could happen is that they'd be horribly embarrassed, but get over it by mocking me mercilessly for the next ten years (not in a bullying way - just in the way families do), but maybe it would open up something fun and healthy for them. Or heck, maybe they've already discovered sex toys on their own and will laugh that I thought it was a big deal.

    I can honestly say I've never discussed sex toys and masturbation with anyone other than my partners and internet strangers. I kind of picture the three of us having one of our girl-talk sessions, when I pull out the cute little packets and hand them over and say "Here. I thought you would have some fun with these."

    Any opinions on this?

    I should also mention I'm totally high on headache medicine right now, so my 'good idea/bad idea' filter probably isn't working so well!

    1300315277
    menyanthe [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 499
    • Joined: 5 Feb 2011

    For a friend - yes, I would, but for family - hm... wouldn't even think about it... My mother is not using even tampons...

    1300315593
    Doug [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
    • Posts: 667
    • Joined: 4 Jun 2010

    friends, maybe (got encouraged to buy my first toy by a friend)

    family, well seeing as i found a bullet in my bros room i pointed him towards this site but normaly never. If i did it would be an annonoums package

    1300315691
    BigPoppa [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Colonel
    • Posts: 382
    • Joined: 24 Jan 2010

    I'm of the same mind. Unless someone has expressly brought it up in a conversation prior like ' I wonder what a vibrator is like' etc etc .

    Would love to be a fly on the wall if you do it!

    1300315805
    ghostgirl [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 869
    • Joined: 26 Sep 2010

    silverdrop wrote:

    I was raised in a rather conservative household, where everyone knew that masturbation was a sin. Obviously I've gotten over that by now. I also think that maybe the rest of the family has kind of gotten over it as well. And I just got the mad idea to give my mom and sister each one of the Shag Factory bullet vibes (the Love and Peace ones) and leave it up to them whether to use it personally or with their husbands.

    I think the worst that could happen is that they'd be horribly embarrassed, but get over it by mocking me mercilessly for the next ten years (not in a bullying way - just in the way families do), but maybe it would open up something fun and healthy for them. Or heck, maybe they've already discovered sex toys on their own and will laugh that I thought it was a big deal.

    I can honestly say I've never discussed sex toys and masturbation with anyone other than my partners and internet strangers. I kind of picture the three of us having one of our girl-talk sessions, when I pull out the cute little packets and hand them over and say "Here. I thought you would have some fun with these."

    Any opinions on this?

    I should also mention I'm totally high on headache medicine right now, so my 'good idea/bad idea' filter probably isn't working so well!

    Think this bit tells you all you need to know, really bad idea unless you can cope with the fallout. I know I wouldnt do it and I had that kind of upbringing where touching yourself was wrong/dirty/just not done. Reconsider when the pills have worn off!!

    xGGx

    1300316397
    StrawberryNymph <3 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Captain
    • Posts: 27
    • Joined: 10 Feb 2011

    What pail killer are you on? Maybe I should try them xD They seem to be great!

    Uhh, I would never give anyone in my family anything the least connected to sex... In my mind: I was delivered by the stork!... (childish yes)

    I can see your point in it being fun in a certain situation... but also if the other way around - should my mom/family ever buy me anything "naughty" - I'd NEVER use it (contaminated goods)

    Hmm if you want to give anything that slightly touches the subject, then what about a book? I got this "cute" book from my mom some years ago with sex quotes - was a little funny book, but she was VERY close to the line with what I wouldn't like to receive from her

    1300317873
    ronnie-baby [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 455
    • Joined: 6 Jan 2010

    I bought my best friend a bullet vibe, it was a sparkly purple one with diamontes on it. She absolutely loved it, and didn't think anything of it me buying it for her. I would buy for a family member, as I had the kind of upbringing where my family and parents especially where very liberal and open minded and freely talked about sex. I don't think there's anything wrong with it.

    rb

    x x

    1300318036
    Nymeria [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1236
    • Joined: 26 Mar 2010

    I don't think there's anything wrong with it. You could buy them the gifts and pose it off as some kinda freebie thing to some lingerie you ordered (if you have a special girl in your life).

    They shouldn't be too offended but it does depend on how they're like and what sort of family you are.. Also, you can make it out as mini massagers lol.

    1300318166
    WandA [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 7876
    • Joined: 28 Nov 2007

    If they consider a humble shifty a sin then perhaps not? The worst that might happen could be thatt they consider you'll burn in hell and they need to save your soul...

    Only you can really answer this question but it may be best to come back to it when you're not on meds!

    1300318526
    Divine69 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 212
    • Joined: 11 Nov 2010

    Hey, i kinda agree with what others have said - having said that I was fantastically nervous about giving my best friend a toy but we had a real good natter on the phone and I told her about LH and to have a look see. Then I got my grab bag and got a sophisticated looking clit ticlkler so sent that to her and PHEW! she's all fine about it :)

    My little sister (she's 28, not little but is to me u know?) said to me afew years ago about how jealous she was that I had no probs going into sex toy shops or buying online and that she'd never done that bfore so i mite get her something fun and gentle for her from Lh. BUT we are real close as sisters, more like best friends - the 2 youngest out of a big family so we always used to hang out together.

    The rest of the family I wouldn't even go there - EVER! My eldest sister freaked out when I mentioned the she-wee the other nite !! Bless I geuss....................!!

    1300318602
    Divine69 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 212
    • Joined: 11 Nov 2010

    i mean I guess!! (I'm on crazy painkillers too)!!

    1300323189
    YesChef [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Captain
    • Posts: 97
    • Joined: 3 Dec 2008

    Maybe a bullet vibe might be a bit too far, but you could maybe consider something like the I Rub My Duckie range - http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/s.cfm?term=duck. Still a lot of fun, but a little less embarrassing to unwrap in front of other people.

    1300323197

    [suspended user]

    suspended user
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2830
    • Joined: 30 Oct 2008

    giving one too a like minded friend no probs

    giving to a family member

    1300329245
    Booties [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 455
    • Joined: 9 Dec 2010

    I have given cock rings, lube, condoms, bullets and tenga eggs to friends a fair few times! I don't know about anything sexy though. I have given my mother lingerie but that's as far as I would go. Just a personal opinion, but as much as I think masturbation and sex are fine and normal and for everyone... I'd rather not imagine my family members in the act. =/

    I think if you pass them off as a novelty gift, it could be okay... Or if you've previously discussed it...Otherwise it sounds a little risky...

    1300329343
    Booties [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 455
    • Joined: 9 Dec 2010

    That should say

    "I don't know about giving my family anything sexy though."

    Must have cut it out by accident! Sorry! x

    1300332339
    silverdrop [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 420
    • Joined: 18 Sep 2006

    meds: co-codomal plus presciption headache medicine (and yes, the pharmacist says it's okay to take them at the same time, as long as I don't drive)

    family: very close, rather nutty, no longer church going but still have odd hangups in unexpected ways. Like being okay with gay marriage, but still believing in the literal version of the Adam and Eve story.

    Mom and sis: both are mothers (I'm not) and so often talk with surprising (to me) frankness about bodily things, usually with me going .... ewww TMI!

    Attitudes about sex: Sex before marriage is wrong, sex within marriage is to be encouraged. My mom and sis bought me lots of lingerie for me as a wedding present, then... gave the boxes to me to open in front of my dad and two brothers.

    The giving of presents: I'm a long way from hometown, and going to see them in a couple months, so have a good excuse for the giving of presents to everyone. Though if I do it, I'll at least give them somewhere away from any of the men or kids.

    Me insane? Almost certainly. But gosh,darn it, how the heck is the 'sex is shameful' culture going to end if we're scared of talking about it with the people we're closest to?

    1300352657
    Nymeria [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1236
    • Joined: 26 Mar 2010

    x X x wrote:

    I don't think there's anything wrong with it. You could buy them the gifts and pose it off as some kinda freebie thing to some lingerie you ordered (if you have a special girl in your life).

    They shouldn't be too offended but it does depend on how they're like and what sort of family you are.. Also, you can make it out as mini massagers lol.

    Oops.. why did I assume you were a guy. >.< Sorry!

    I think most girls are quite curious and love girly stuff like lingerie. I agree with the "sex is shameful" stigma but it tends to start at home depending how "traditional", religious or strict your parents are etc.

    If you're quite close to your family members I think you should just go for it. Only if you can pass it off as a joke though. I personally think it's a really cute idea.. only because the toys are really cute and good value!

    I think introducing the idea casually will be a winner. Since you've said sex within marriages is encouraged- if they're happily married it should be fine? A more inconspicuous vibe may work better though- as someone suggested, a rubber duck or a massager.

    Of course, I agree with the main consensus on you know best!

    1300358988
    Lovehoney - Numbers [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Captain
    • Posts: 130
    • Joined: 2 Aug 2010

    Last Christmas, I bought 3 of my friends a Tracey Cox Supersex Sensation Stroker each , which they all seemed to appreciate (not sure if theyve compared notes!)

    I also bought a straight coupled friends of mine a Lelo Massage Candle , which I thought was a nice introduction to it all :-)

    1300359681
    Lady Ness [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2450
    • Joined: 16 May 2010

    I'm happy to provide my sisters with toys, books, lube, condoms, etc all related to sex. They actually think it's cool. When ever I get a freebie it often goes to them.

    Friends have been use to me providing them with random sex related gifts for so many years now that even some of them ask for a new rabbit or lube for xmas or their birthday.

    I'm happy to give gifts like this to most people, and most people are aware it's part of being me as I've always done a lot of research on sex psychology, sexology, etc.

    I wouldn't give my mother a toy as a gift though. Even though she has a lot of erotic books and is an artist who makes/ paints erotic things I believe she is abl enough to pick and choose herself. I've considered buying her erotic novels before, but have came to the conclusion I don't want to incourager her imagination too much as she really does have this big idea a white knight will come and save her one day, trust me it's so big in her mind adding to this would be bad for us as(me and my siblings) her children to cope with it, lol.

    All I will say is that only you can tell if you will be able to give a sex related item to a relative.

    1300376566
    BigPoppa [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Colonel
    • Posts: 382
    • Joined: 24 Jan 2010

    The Nymphomaniac wrote:

    I'm happy to provide my sisters with toys, books, lube, condoms, etc all related to sex. They actually think it's cool. When ever I get a freebie it often goes to them.

    Friends have been use to me providing them with random sex related gifts for so many years now that even some of them ask for a new rabbit or lube for xmas or their birthday.

    I'm happy to give gifts like this to most people, and most people are aware it's part of being me as I've always done a lot of research on sex psychology, sexology, etc.

    I wouldn't give my mother a toy as a gift though. Even though she has a lot of erotic books and is an artist who makes/ paints erotic things I believe she is abl enough to pick and choose herself. I've considered buying her erotic novels before, but have came to the conclusion I don't want to incourager her imagination too much as she really does have this big idea a white knight will come and save her one day, trust me it's so big in her mind adding to this would be bad for us as(me and my siblings) her children to cope with it, lol.

    All I will say is that only you can tell if you will be able to give a sex related item to a relative.

    How did you get into this? Its something I'm interested in to but wonder if it might risk mixing academia and pleasure and so reduce my enjoyment. Any tips on a gentle introduction to these areas perhaps?

    Would really appreciate your advice

    Thread closed

    This thread is closed, so no new messages can be posted.